At the same time as the door closed, my tears began to fall.

I am sad, I am demotivated and I am really sad the whole day and I don't like this feeling, but I can't stop my emotion as well.

I am certainly sure that I am missing him already!

Hello everyone it's me again, how was your Friday so far? I wanna apologize if I haven't read your articles today, as the whole day I am literally feeling demotivated and down. I wasn't in the mood to read any articles, so I just spent my time in noisecash to divert my attention. However my loneliness is very strong that even in noisecash I can't pretend that I am okay. In my comment I type Hahaha, but the truth is I am not even smiling. It's really hard to hide my true feelings, so tonight I really spent some time to cry to feel better. Luckily it works as I am here now typing this blog.

Today is the last day that my son and I can be with his father, that is why I am really sad. My partner already left home tonight, and that was the reason for my loneliness.

So this morning when my partner wake up, we went to the grocery store to buy some toiletries for him, so when he arrives at his work place he already have some stocks.

Since we only need to buy those necessary toiletries, I just invited him to have a walk so our son can exercise as well.

This is what I am saying 😃.

You really can't stop him from running. Every time he went outside he won't walk, as he would run instead. 😅

I was left behind as I let my partner to chase his son, so he would understand that chasing is also tiring 🤣. I also took the opportunity to take a photo of them while walking as they walk almost the same 😅. Like father like son, indeed.

Watching them walking hand in hand makes me emotional. Well it was because my son here is very happy. It's not that I don't want him to be happy, but because today he enjoyed his walk because his Papa is with him. It's me who always accompany him everytime he go out for a walk and so today he was really happy that he was walking with his Papa.

Normally if they go outside together they always ride our motorcycle, but today is quite different as they go out walking. It really makes me sad as he didn't know that his Papa is leaving. I don't know how he gonna react if starting tomorrow he can only see his Papa from the screen.

Furthermore, after we bought his toiletries, he went to the barber shop to have his haircut. Then after his haircut done, we went home as he still need to finalize his stuff. He double check if he already have everything that he needs so he won't left any import things at home. The rest of the morning was being spent on packing up his stuff. Then in the afternoon while my partner and my son was sleeping I actually tried to write an article but I found it hard to finish. Writer's block keeps on attacking me and so I eventually leave the unfinished article in my draft.

My sadness really affect my focus today. Even I tried to divert my attention to some of my chores, I still feel so down. I really feel so sad the whole day.

Since I can't focus on my writing I decided to go outside to buy our viand. I have to cook early, as my partner will gonna eat his dinner first before leaving home tonight.

Honestly, while I am cooking I was also sad, as tomorrow I can no longer prepare food for him. He was already away from me, and it will took two years before I can be able prepare his favourite food for him again. I'm gonna miss it as well.

The rest of the day, our home was filled with silence. I can sense and I can saw from my partner's face his sadness but he keeps on trying to hide it from me. I know he was sad and he don't wanna be away from us as well. Even if he didn't say anything his expression say it all, but because both of us don't wanna filled this house with tear's, we just choose to remain silent.

So tonight at around 7:30 he already left home. Right after I closed our door, my tear's began to fell. I suddenly felt that the house went empty as it was covered with silence. My son didn't cry as his Papa trick him. He saw me crying and he remains silent. But it seems like he felt my sadness, as he suddenly hug me. I know he still don't understand what's happening, but he tried to comfort me and that makes me more emotional 🥺.

But anyway I'll be alright soon, for sure. Two years is already too soon this time, as time quickly pass by.

This is all for today, and I'm sorry for this nonsensical blog again. I just wanna express myself here. So I will end up here as I will read your articles until I fall asleep.

Thank you for reading ❤️.

All photos from this blog are all mine or else stated otherwise.

Lead image was edited using Canva.