Looking at my wife earlier today as she dances vigorously while leading the praise song in church, and my two boys playing the drums and the keyboard apiece I sigh with great relief and satisfaction. It's been a fruitful marital journey all these years and am fortunate to be one of the luckiest men who married early.
Joyce and I will be celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary in two weeks and looking back to those 15 years and how we have come along seem pleasurable memory to never forget. I was 25 while Joyce was 22 when we got married. I was in the middle of getting my bachelor's degree in a 6 years course while Joyce was just starting up as an undergraduate. We lived in a small single apartment, worked together at the shop as call vendors and selling airtime, and shared both a bike and a pile of student debt. I wouldn’t have had it any other way — it’s been an incredible fifteen years. Looking back to those years and considering the young age at which I got married makes me sometimes feel an anomaly these days. I remember when the mom of one of my wife's friends found out we were getting hitched before graduating, she horribly looked at us, and asked, “Why?”
It’s a cultural norm and tradition in my land that you should put off marriage so you can focus on your education and career first. While getting married young isn’t the best for everyone, there are some great benefits to doing so, and that's is what I want to share with you today.
The benefits of marrying young
Everyone desires to have a happy marriage and when it comes to getting happiness in marriage getting hitched between the ages of 22 and 25 seems to be the best time according to research. That might not be for everyone of course, but the benefits outlined below are really mind-blowing.
1. Marrying early means you are likely going to marry as virgins
This is a crucial matter as it relates to marriage. You and your spouse will have no baggage to carry. You might likely have no experience of breakup or heartbreak, and no lingering feelings for past partners. Since both of you are the first in your lives you are likely to go into a marriage as virgins without any sexual experiences, this gives you more pleasure to explore yourselves sexually. Waiting to get to your thirties is only waiting to carry more baggage as you will be carrying more than a decade’s worth of break-ups, lingering feelings for past partners, trust issues, and disappointments with you. Everyone you date also in the past has got a bunch of baggage. When you marry young you and your wife have fewer comparisons and retroactive jealousy of each other past relationships to deal with. No question of exes, it's between you and her in lasting romance forever.
2. Marrying young gives you the chance to marry someone highly compatible with you.
When you marry young you're likely going to marry someone with whom you are highly compatible. Someone who truly shares your interest and has a lot of things in common, a true peer. My wife and I met at the university while studying the same course. We shared similar interests and dreams and came from a similar background, this makes her the yin to my yang in everything. We club party and run extracurricular activities together in school. We are in and out of each other playing like children up till these days.
I find it very sickening to see a lot of young men and women put off marriage so they can shop around longer, thinking that the more they look, the better chance they’ll have of finding someone who’s just the right match for them. Chances are the longer you wait to get married the more ideal potential partners are taken away from the market.
3. Assurance of more and better sex
There's no better place to have more and better sex than in marriage and when you marry young you have the assurance of more and better sex even years after marriage. This may seem like an aberration yet it's the truth. Married men have better sex time than singles. There's pressure nor tension, you aren't going to be forcing a woman to come over to your place, you got your Mrs to go home to. You got more years to spend together enjoying healthy sex than those who got married in the 40s. Thanks to youthful energy.
4. Your financial life will definitely improve
This may seem like a joke, how can marrying early improve a person's financial status? A lot of people today put off marrying for the sake of financial instability or because they are not yet financially sound. This may never come to be as the way of money is getting harder and harder to achieve. The financial issue is important in marriage and if it's handled with maturity there's every likelihood that a young couples' financial status will definitely improve. married men work harder and smarter. Marriage also allows spouses to pool their resources together and encourages accountability and fiscal responsibility
Earlier on, we started with a small business and go with a plan of saving 70% of our income. We didn't have a need for many costly things, jewelry and sophisticated clothing were not our likings. With children not yet around, we were able to save enough to establish a good business that has to pay for my fees in school for three years and my wife training after I have completed mine. That business has survived for many years and still growing today. If I was waiting till I finish school and get a job before marriage, I guess I might still be single now and searching for money.
5. The best time to have kids is to marry young
This is a fact, women find it easier to get pregnant and deliver safely at the age of 20 to 30. Besides being easier to conceive, it’s also just plain easier to raise your kids. Before I became a father, I always hear people complaining about how hard and tiring it is raising children. But I am glad I started early in my 20s when I had a little more energy to spare. With my first and second kids now 14 and 13 years respectively and the eldest going into final year in high school, I know I wouldn't be a grandpa at70s.
Having kids early also brings additional hands of support for the family. My kids are adding support to the family in any way they can. The house chores are easily shared among them giving us the parents to sort out more important things. The eldest learned how to repair mobile phones and get money from them to support his education and also help the siblings when needed. All together we are a team and a working force moving in one direction.
Wait! Am I in any way suggesting that you get married today?
That will be your decision to make, am only sharing from my experience and the benefits I derived from marrying early.
If you have any counter reasons why it will not be good to marry early feel free to drop them in the comments section. Anyway, it's my wedding anniversary in two weeks.
Cheers!!
Image source; Unsplash
You're a good example of early marriage, but things don't always work that way. Getting married at an early age increases your chances of having children and seeing your child grow up to go to school, start a business, and even get married. I think early marriage is pretty attractive just the way it is, but the problems, the problems, the problems. I hope your life continues with the same beauty.