This is a continuation of the Unfinished Prose I published two days ago. You might be confused with what will happen here, so I urge you to read the first part. I will wait for you here.
Are you done? Now, read on to know what's gonna happen next. Enjoy!
My feet were fixed into the ground. My eyes are fixed on his usual, smirking face. His hands are in his pocket, and I am sure he scoffed a bit. Damn, I don't know what to do!
I immediately looked away and went inside to turn all the lights off. This isn't real. Maybe I was dreaming. Right. Maybe I was sleepwalking. I will sleep again. Right.
I covered myself with the blanket and tried to brush off all suffocating thoughts. This is a nightmare, yeah. It will be over tomorrow. Just as I could breathe a little bit more stable, I heard the main door opening. Sht! Did he just..
"You do realize you still haven't changed the password, right?" his calm voice echoed the house.
I had no choice but to get up again. It must be two minutes of me just walking around my bedroom while taking deep breaths, before going out to face him.
He stood there comfortably, his hands now crossed over his chest. He gave me a look as if he really lives here. What a jerk.
"Won't you at least give me some water?" he spoke.
"Why are you here?"
"Oh, just a cup of coffee will do. I am not planning to sleep tonight."
"Ralph," I sighed, "You should go."
He sat down on the sofa, exactly there in his favorite spot.
"At least serve me some noodles.."
"Why the heck won't you—" I stopped because my voice suddenly rose, and took a deep breath again, "Why won't you listen? Just.. just please go."
"Pushing people away must be your specialty."
"What?"
"Look at you, driving a visitor away."
"You are not a visitor! You broke in!"
"I did not! You know this is my home, too, Lara! You know that!"
I was speechless at his sudden rise of voice. And because he's right. No matter how I try to deny it, he's part of this place too. He was. Or maybe he still is.
"This is my home now. I have already cleared it, Ralph. What were you thinking? It's so late, what made you come here?"
"You never changed."
"What do you mean?"
"You are still pushing me away. Like you've always been."
"Because I should!"
"Then why in the world should you?!"
I could see his eyes getting wet and I found it harder to control my emotions. But I kept being strong. I held it in with all my might.
"Why do you ask? Ralph, It's been four fcking years—"
"Yeah! Four damn years that I am still clueless why! I still wonder what I did wrong, for you to suddenly break up with me! What have I done, tell me! Because it has been four years, and I am going insane every single day thinking of that darned reason you won't even tell me!"
"I.. I'm sorry.."
"There.. there you go again with that never ending stupid word. You are apologizing again for no fixed reason. I don't need your apology, Lara.. I need your reason!"
That's it. All his pleading words pierced right into my heart, and tears started to pour like there's no tomorrow. In my blurry vision, I could see him covering his scornful face while weeping.
It hurts me so much to see him crying like this. I am always sorry, and I freakin' hate myself because I still hurt him. I am sorry, my love.
"Please.. please give me an explanation. I am dying to know.."
"Nothing's going to change, Ralph. I am already fine. And so are you.. Go home now.. Let's not make this more complicated as it is." I looked down and clenched my fist to make my self stop crying.
"Who are you to decide that?"
I could only look up to his face full of resentment and listen to his pleas.
"You think I am fine now? You think just marrying a woman I barely know would make everything fine?"
"I don't deserve you. Bea was more—"
"What? Bea was rich? She was prettier? So you convinced me to marry her? Well you must be happy now, I married her, because you told me so."
"You were already angaged anyway. I was just a third party.. I should not have been in the story, anyway.. I.."
"You were absolutely aware that it was not in my power to decide that engagement! Lara, you know very well that you are the one I 'd definitely choose.."
My lips almost bled with my futile attempt to not break down again.
"Both of your families were merging that time.. It would benefit your—"
"That did not matter to me! You know I would not care about that..." He looked up and took a deep breath, even I could still hear his voice shaking.
"I was just waiting for you to open up to me. How did you feel? I was just waiting for you tell me to call off the engagement. When you just said it, you know I would do it without even thinking twice."
But what I did was to break up with him. To encourage him to get married with the girl I thought would be more suited for him than I was. I chose to heed to the fear of what the future would have in store for us if ever I held on to him, with the powerless hand that I am.
I was a poor girl with no power to fight against the rich. I was a young, stupid girl who only loved, just to be slapped by the harsh reality of the rich.
I took all the strength I have left, and calmed myself down. I made sure I maintained my composure to speak in a way he will understand.
"I could not do anything.." I started.
He looked up and his eyes met mine. I saw him coming towards me, placing his hands on my shoulders, with those eyes ever so expectant. I did not have any energy to shive his hands away.
"What do you mean you could not do anything?" he asked.
"I will ruin you if I stayed. Your dad's going to cut off all his ties with you. He is willing to destroy you if you continued to rebel against him.. I could not.." I tried to hold back my tears.. but I failed miserably. "I would not live properly knowing I destroyed your life." I looked down as I attempted to wipe all the fresh tears from my face, and started weeping.
"Lara, you know I don't care about it.. I could take care of myself. Why.. why didn't you tell me anything? You should have let me know.."
"How could I?!" I lifted my head up enough to meet his eyes again.
"His men were always watching you! And me! If I made a move, he'll also have my mom hurt! You know, mom is the only one I have.. I wanted to be selfish for once.. I wanted to choose you.. but choosing myself will hurt everyone.."
I felt his warm embrace enclosing my weakened body. This is how it feels like, to finally exhale all this suffocating truth inside for years. For shutting up, and living as quiet as possible..
I have lived as if I am a ghost. His family are all in the States now, but I still fear about everything. I am even scared of hearing myself breathing. It took me lots of months before getting a job that is not in anyway affected by his dad's connection. Somehow, I was blacklisted in these specific companies, just because I fell inlove with his son. Just as things can't get any worse, my sickly mom died a year after our break up. I was left all alone.
Loving Ralph was a bliss, but it took away lots from me. It was so stupid of a poor girl like me to love someone as high as him. We weren't on the same ground, but he made us work. He did not give up on me, and so did I. Never did I know that choosing to do so, would ruin me. And him.
"I am sorry.. I am sorry you had to go all of this alone.." he said.
All I could do was cry and cry. It was almost five minutes before I finally calmed down, and stopped crying. I notice his hug slowly getting loosened until he's in front of me again.
"Let's start again, Lara. It's not too late.."
"Are you crazy? You are married now!"
"That marriage is the least of my concern now, so you can stop thinking about it. Let's—"
"It's been four years now. So much has changed.. And I.. I have already moved on." I lied, again.
I am used to hiding how I really feel, so let's keep this masochist side of mine going.
"Make me understand. Because it's not what I see in your eyes."
I looked away and immediately went to the kitchen to get some water.
"Stop playing with me. Go back to your wife because she might be looking for you now. Have this before you go." I said, as I handed him some water and bread.
I had no words. I just saw him sitting in his favorite spot again, and started munching the bread I just gave him.
"Ralph, what the fck are you doing?!"
"You gave me my favorite type of bread. You still live in this place were we used to stay. You still frequent our favorite cafe.. Do you think I won't notice these at all?"
"W-what.. You saw me earlier?"
"Mmm.Hmm. I could guess you were busy with poems, probably."
"S-stop the nonsense, And just go!"
With all I can, I dragged him outside, only to be in awe with his next words.
"This is my home now. If not, I will drag you to my place."
"Do you realize what you're doing? What do you think will Bea say if she knows this?!" my patience is at its bare minimum now.
This guy must have forgotten that we just had a heavy discussion earlier and he's being suddenly so goofy now.
"Bea is not my wife anymore. Since four years ago. Excuse me.." he said and was able to get inside again because I stopped moving right after hearing his answer.
"What? How in the... What did Bea say? What about your father.. Bea's with you earlier.. I definitely saw you together—"
"Calm down and listen to me carefully."
"How could you smile at this confusing situation?!"
"Here's my say. Let me stay here for the night, because I am not definitely staying with Bea.. And I will explain everything."
"Okay, fine! I give up! You better answer all my questions or else I will call the police!" I said, not really meaning the last sentence, because how could I.
It was a long night. I admit, as hours went by, the night went deeper, the atmosphere gradually got lighter. I could count in my fingers the moments we laughed, because he has a hobby of joking while telling a story, that's how he is.
Ralph and Bea were only married in paper, and only lasted for three weeks. They had a divorce unknown to both if their fathers, and had more of a brother and sister relationship. For almost four years, they planned on bringing down Ralph's father by secretly gathering evidences of his wrong-doings. Bea's dad eventually knew their plans, and fortunately aided them in their mission.
This year, they successfully brought his case to the court and they won. Ralph said that his father has been serving in prison for a few months now, and is definitely staying there for good. Bea went along with Ralph to this country, to fix all business-related processes, including managing what Ralph's father has left.
Those four years were tough for both of us. I am thinking about him that long, while living in regret for letting him go. He continued to fight a silent battle against his own father, while still thinking about me, who pushed him away.
For only two months, I already gave up on avoiding him. He courted me again like how he did four years ago. He made me laugh a lot, and made me more confident again. This year, my poems are now a regular publication in the magazine produced by the company I am working in. Moreover, I have gained a good position in the publishing department.
It feels so free without his cruel father in the story. In a few more months, we are getting married, and I can't be any happier.
I've always thought I'll be lonely forever. I had done lots of things I truly did regret, and lots of hardships that impacted me badly. Somehow, thinking of this guy made life bearable. Even thinking about a guy whom I mistakenly thought as a married one, made some assistance of making me sane, I guess. I don't know how to explain it. I did not expect I could be with Ralph again, after four long years. But now, he's with me. What more could I wish for?
I wonder if I insisted to push him away that night. Will we get back together like this again? Probably not. And that's another thing I'd regret again, this time, for the rest if my life.
Oh, and if you're curious. Yeah, the passcode of the door is the date we first met.
End
I am sorry, I took this long!
I really have no idea what got into me that I started this story without even thinking of what'd happen next. This is indeed difficult, to try creating a story continuation out of that first part, which is even unplanned as well. LOL Please bear with me, because I have this habit of starting something without even planning properly how it would go. Only in writing though.
I hope you still liked it. Did you? Don't forget to share your thoughts below. I accept feedbacks, just make it constructive. Hehe.
It has been so long, so I'll cut my nonsense here. Thanks for being here, and until next time!
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hi, I never did read the first part and I'm sure I won't. It will only make me cry( kidding). as I was writing my comment I had a heavy heart on what I just read despite the happy ending. by the way I really like your story,