March 12, 2021, 6:25 pm
As I'm writing this article, I am sitting in a trunk that I found here at the seashore where there is a phone signal. I think this trunk was put here for the sake of those people, like me, who want to spend some time on the Internet. Since I got here, having no Internet connection is quite a struggle, especially that I have to attend my online classes and check our MVLE.
March 07, 2021
The day when my friends and I went to Blue Lagoon beach to celebrate the birthday of our dearest friend, Rhea Mae. We had so many things to talk about because it took almost 9 months for us to have a get-together. Perhaps, it was because of the lockdown and pandemic.
That same day, when I got home, my mother received a phone call from her sister telling her that their father died. I saw my mom break down into tears and I couldn't do anything to ease her pain.
Immediately, we went to Mabubua, which I call an island, where our grandfather lives and where I am now. We got here at around 8 in the evening.
When we came here, a cold body of an old man welcomed us. My mother cried so much and I can't help but cry too.
Then I remember my last encounter with my grandfather. If I remember it right, it was just two weeks ago when he came to our house. He was going to Saud to visit his friend who lives there and go fishing. He asked for 200 pesos for his fare. He also asked for some rice because he said, he has nothing to eat anymore.
Every time I remember our last encounter, I couldn't help but be lonely. I wish I could have given more that time.
Many speculations are made. Some are saying he died because of drunkenness. But my mother and aunts are doubting that because he wasn't drunk at that time. Many believed that he was killed. But the truth will come out in time.
Ever since my 'tatang' died, I have seen my parents quarrel all the time to the point where one of them would say: "You're probably happy now that my father is dead."
Hearing these words thrown out just shatters me.
I'm not as strong as I appear to be. I am a weak soul. I may look tough, but deep inside I'm dying of pain. I wanted to ask for help and support, but I did not because it doesn't run in my blood. I wanted people to show sympathy not because I asked them to but because they care. This week has been so terrifying. I have seen how a loved one's death can unite us all. But I also witnessed how a living person wants to take advantage of the dead. I am sick- physically, mentally, emotionally. But despite it all, I still tell myself that everything will be alright in the end. That the world will not stop revolving until I'm ready. That's how life works. It is never fair.
March 15, 2021, will be the day of his burial. Until then, I think I won't be very active on read and noise for a while.
There are so many things to be fixed.
As I end this life update, the surroundings are already dark. And so I am heading to my grandfather's house.
Condolence po. Keep strong po.