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Regrets..

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Written by   171
3 months ago

Regret is a feeling of guilt and sometimes dejection that follows a wrong action, or an action that should have been taken but was not taken or an action that was not taken on time. Whatever you want to define regrets as, it is a good thing and but what happens when we get into the abyss of deep and depressive regret? Yes I believe such a thing exist. Sometimes we get overwhelmed when we find out that we have done something terribly wrong, and we get to a stage where we start to question our conscience, that too is a good thing but when it gets to a stage wherecwe get so involved and absorbed in regret that we fail to move forward and carry on with life, that's when there's a big problem.

We often hear people after them emptying the contents of their hearts to us, meaning the deep regrets they carry on their hearts and then they say, "that's something I will have to love with for the rest of my life". No bro! THAT IS NOT SOMETHING THAT YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! But of course we don't just tell them that to their face. We acknowledge the situation and appreciate their confiding in us by telling us what it is they have deep regrets about. You know what it does? You know what happens when you decide to live with a past hurt or regret for the rest of your life? It blocks clarity. You get triggered by situations that shouldn't trigger you because they have something to do or are somehow related to that past regret you've refused to deal with. Regrets would never solve anything, it only helps you acknowledge your mistakes but after that, dwelling more in regrets and situations of "... Had I known earlier I should have..." only creates wishful thinking in your heart, making you wish you can time travel and turn things around, which is in fact a foolish fantasy because things like that do not happen in real life.

I have seem situations where the person offended had already forgiven the offender and moved on with his life but the offender still feels regrets and it starts affecting his life. It makes me wonder, "is this regret really as a result of mistakes? Wasn't it done intentionally and the guilty conscience is slowly eating the person alive?" because I believe that as a human who recognise that it is only human for us to make mistakes, one needn't dwell on past mistakes and past hurt except or course it wasn't a mistake in the first place, unless it was done intentionally after we realize that what we did only hurt us in the long run and we can't just live with ourselves anymore even if the person we offended has already forgiven us(which sometimes result in deeper regret because we realise we hurt a good person who meant us no harm).

Regrets are very good. In fact it is the first step towards changing our (bad) behaviors. If we feel regret and are really sorry for the wrong we did to someone it makes it much easier or us to change and get things right back on track. But just like all things, feelings and actions, there should be a limit. Positive or negative emotions should always be kept in moderation. That is where everything is right. That is the only place where all things are right. That is the place we ought to stay in for the rest of our lives.

Self-love

Self-love is one of the steps and probably the most important step towards acceptance. When we love ourselves and are aware and wary of things that go on within us which can be potentially harmful to our well-being when given the attention it seeks, then we can help keep things in check within our inner environment, balancing it with what's going on in our external environment. Acceptance of what's wrong or the wrong we have done to others as well as the wrong others have done to us is an aspect of self-love. So beautiful soul, love yourseld more, love others more and never stop letting go..

Thanks for reading.

Yours Layly,

❤❤❤

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Written by   171
3 months ago
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Comments

Acknowledging our mistakes and regretting are both good things. What we have to remember is to not dwell on our past and on our mistakes. We should learn to forgive ourselves too and not be too hard on ourselves. In that way we can easily move on.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

Dwelling on them makes us overthink too much and we get absorbed in our mistakes instead of moving on.

$ 0.00
3 months ago

We all may have regrets but its more important that we move on. We should focus on making the next hour or day worth it.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

We made mistakes, we regretted it, but never ever be stuck into the past because the past doesn't define ourselves. Yes, we were at fault and we can't take it back, but we can make it right. We continuously learn from our mistake and there's always a room for growth and improvement.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

Always move on regardless

$ 0.00
3 months ago

Feeling remorseful after doing something wrong shows that one has a good behaviour and that maybe it wasn't intentional

$ 0.01
3 months ago

I think regret is normal. Feeling regret reminds us to think carefully about our decisions and helps us not to make the same mistakes again. Regrets are also how we learn about ourselves, and know what it is we really want. In feeling regret, we have clarity about what outcome and things we truly want for ourselves.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

In fact what you just described is the reason I wrote this article. Thanks greatly.

$ 0.00
3 months ago

My layly, thanks For the morning tonic. That’s just life for us. At times we live out of regrets of our past actions. But the best of regrets is to regret not doing more of good work.

$ 0.00
3 months ago

That's it Yusuf. Thanks for the input.

$ 0.00
3 months ago

Regrets are inevitable.. But we should always move on and just learn the lessons from them.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

I agree. What we should strive for is to always move regardless.

$ 0.00
3 months ago

Self love is need to be prioritized first. There is no such thing by loving ourselves.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

It is really wonderful journey while going through your words. Specially about self love. We need to respect our existence at first.

$ 0.00
3 months ago