Regret is a feeling of guilt and sometimes dejection that follows a wrong action, or an action that should have been taken but was not taken or an action that was not taken on time. Whatever you want to define regrets as, it is a good thing and but what happens when we get into the abyss of deep and depressive regret? Yes I believe such a thing exist. Sometimes we get overwhelmed when we find out that we have done something terribly wrong, and we get to a stage where we start to question our conscience, that too is a good thing but when it gets to a stage wherecwe get so involved and absorbed in regret that we fail to move forward and carry on with life, that's when there's a big problem.
We often hear people after them emptying the contents of their hearts to us, meaning the deep regrets they carry on their hearts and then they say, "that's something I will have to love with for the rest of my life". No bro! THAT IS NOT SOMETHING THAT YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! But of course we don't just tell them that to their face. We acknowledge the situation and appreciate their confiding in us by telling us what it is they have deep regrets about. You know what it does? You know what happens when you decide to live with a past hurt or regret for the rest of your life? It blocks clarity. You get triggered by situations that shouldn't trigger you because they have something to do or are somehow related to that past regret you've refused to deal with. Regrets would never solve anything, it only helps you acknowledge your mistakes but after that, dwelling more in regrets and situations of "... Had I known earlier I should have..." only creates wishful thinking in your heart, making you wish you can time travel and turn things around, which is in fact a foolish fantasy because things like that do not happen in real life.
I have seem situations where the person offended had already forgiven the offender and moved on with his life but the offender still feels regrets and it starts affecting his life. It makes me wonder, "is this regret really as a result of mistakes? Wasn't it done intentionally and the guilty conscience is slowly eating the person alive?" because I believe that as a human who recognise that it is only human for us to make mistakes, one needn't dwell on past mistakes and past hurt except or course it wasn't a mistake in the first place, unless it was done intentionally after we realize that what we did only hurt us in the long run and we can't just live with ourselves anymore even if the person we offended has already forgiven us(which sometimes result in deeper regret because we realise we hurt a good person who meant us no harm).
Regrets are very good. In fact it is the first step towards changing our (bad) behaviors. If we feel regret and are really sorry for the wrong we did to someone it makes it much easier or us to change and get things right back on track. But just like all things, feelings and actions, there should be a limit. Positive or negative emotions should always be kept in moderation. That is where everything is right. That is the only place where all things are right. That is the place we ought to stay in for the rest of our lives.
Self-love is one of the steps and probably the most important step towards acceptance. When we love ourselves and are aware and wary of things that go on within us which can be potentially harmful to our well-being when given the attention it seeks, then we can help keep things in check within our inner environment, balancing it with what's going on in our external environment. Acceptance of what's wrong or the wrong we have done to others as well as the wrong others have done to us is an aspect of self-love. So beautiful soul, love yourseld more, love others more and never stop letting go..
Thanks for reading.