"Wait for me." "Wait for me."
Your silence is what I always remember. You and grandma would go about your day in silence most of the time, a comfortable silence. I remember sleeping in between you two when I was a kid. Early to bed and early to rise. You gave me freedom but also reminded me of things I should not do. We didn't have a lot. You don't shower me with gifts. You are not materialistic but I have always felt rich and blessed with the freedom you give me, better than any material things.
You could have reprimanded me but I can't remember. For sure, you have never raised your voice to me or spanked me. You never got angry with me. You are so patient and kind. I saw once how you got angry with my aunt, your youngest. I saw your fury and how you have spanked her. For whatever reason, I can't remember what caused it. For that I have respected you, not feared, but it made me understand the love you have for me. I am not your only grandson but whenever I spend times with you, I feel special.
What I remember most are the times you would cut my hair with blunt scissors, the only scissors sharp enough to cut hair. I have a lot of nips and permanent scars on my head due to that. Hairs would be pinned every now and then in between the scissors which would then be plucked as you continue what you are doing. The scissors would loosen and you have to tighten again and again. I was at your mercy but I bravely went through all the ordeal. I feel proud to have my hair cut by you. I wear these scars like badge of honor. Of course I was ashamed as I grew older for others would tease me for it but I have grown to love it. I consider myself lucky for having a grandfather cutting my hair.
Over the years, as I have grown old, you have become shorter physically as you are bent over by age and I have been stretched by time and age. I used to look up to you but now I have to sit down to level with you and see you eye to eye.
As you age and grew weaker, it's getting harder and harder to accept that a once strong person you are seems so frail and fragile.
You said to my sister, "wait for me!" while gripping her hand tight. You said it twice to the consternation of my sister. When asked what you meant by that, you just shook your head.
It was frustrating and traumatic to watch you online as my sister tried to revive you. We felt helpless who are watching as the events unfold. We all kept holding back our tears. Whenever I think of that time, I shiver and tears come to my eyes. I hope you have bade us goodbye peacefully without having had to suffer in your sleep.
No more pain. No more suffering. Thank you, lolo, for the memories. I already miss you.
Our condolences kabsat...