Light in the dark

June 6, 2020

At school, we always listen to a story out of the Bible first. It's a different Bible from ours at home. This one had pictures. I like to listen to stories but the Bible at home is difficult. I don't understand the words and I do not like my mother's voice it sounds sharp and she is not a good reader. My father's voice is better. The teacher knows how to tell stories. Perhaps she likes to tell them? We all have to sit at our desk and listen. It doesn't take long, just a few minutes. After that, we sing a song and the lessons start. If the lessons start the teacher's voice is sharp too. I am happy if she doesn't ask me anything. I am not a smart kid, not like Wim and Caroline. Today Wim cried. It was the first time he did not get an A+. I wonder why he cries about it. He is still good. His dad is a farmer. He can be a farmer too. His dad can teach him how to do it and he can count.

The teacher of Sunday school is kind.

Perhaps she doesn't like me I still like her. She is a friendly person and never shouts. She tells stories too and we she teaches us new songs. Songs about what Jesus says and candles in the dark. She says you have to be your own light and it doesn't matter how small your light is or how dark your corner of the world. I am not afraid of the dark. I like it because it's much safer in the dark. I know the way. It's better not to make some light. Her book is different too but it has pictures also.

June 7, 2020

I polished the shoes and did my best but my mother kept screaming at me. Her voice hurts my ears and she threw her shoes at me. The housekeeper says nothing although she is a grown-up. My mother hit me with a shoe with high heels. She wants to hurt me that is why she uses her shoe, a whip, or the dog's leash and never her hands. My father uses his slippers. I hate them. I am not a good Christian. My mother told me I am bad. I am evil. If I am evil God doesn't love me. I know now but I already knew. Why should I pray, shiver for the cold to someone who does not exist? I like the stories in the fairy tale book more. I don't think God is a fair and honest person. He kills and people still say he is good. Perhaps I am good if they write a book about me too and I kill some people. God kills, Cain kills, they all lie and Jesus likes the liars, cheaters, and killers too. He even calls them his friend.

My body hurts but it doesn't matter I just want to sleep now.

Auntie

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