Marriage (does not) suffer when a woman earns more than her husband ?

Joe and his wife used to travel frequently on business, however, when they had children, one of them needed to stay home longer. Since his travels took longer, they decided it would be him.
"It was the beginning of a big change," Joe said. who works as an engineer in Oklahoma. "This change meant that I would primarily take care of the children, take them to and from school, take them to check-ups, trainings and the like, while my wife's job will remain a priority in her schedule. She earns almost twice as much as I do at the moment. "

Although this distribution proved to be great for the family, they found condemnation from the environment, which did not react best to the change in traditionally set roles."

I would be dishonest to say that I don't think about it sometimes," he said. "The problem did not arise because of such a difference in earnings, but it is a socially sensitive topic."

Although the number of families where the mother is the main breadwinner is still quite small, this is an ever-growing trend: in 1980, only 13 percent of married women earned the same or the same as their husbands, and that number almost doubled by 2000 and increased at 25 percent. Since then, the growth has slowed down a bit, but in 2017, about 28% of families still had this distribution of family roles.

Previous studies have often linked this trend to negative consequences for marital status. Women who earn more than their male partners, even just $ 5,000 higher annually, are more likely to divorce, according to research conducted at the University of Chicago in 2015.

Another study conducted at Cornell University confirms that husbands whose wives earn more have a greater tendency to cheat and care less about the household.

"In this case, we're talking about identity and a sense of power," says clinical and forensic psychologist Kate Balestrieri. "Men are often assigned the role of the person who should take care of the family, which in most cases means that they should contribute financially."

If a man feels this way, he may begin to think that his manhood is diminishing. Such men often feel shame, and shame can turn into anger and passive aggressive behavior.

Some research, however, presents this topic in a different way, and that is that the link between the fact that women are increasingly earning more for the family and the number of divorces is weaker, and that the most common reason for divorce is in fact a lack of general equality. respect in marriage.

Psychologists believe that the way we are raised affects our perception of marriage and bonding much more than we thought. If a man grew up in a home where his mother did not work, and his wife now earns a lot of money, he may feel uncomfortable and unhappy without even being aware of where such emotions come from.

If a man's self-confidence is low, a good idea might be to visit a therapist, who can help him reconnect with his vitality and masculinity. So they can also learn how to trust themselves more and create a partnership based on equality.