Wrong usage of being a mother

August 04, 2022

It's been raining cats and dogs ever since earlier and I can't go out so I am just here in the building's hallway trying to write something while staring at the droplets on the parked cars and on the guardhouse in the village.

I was scrolling Tiktok when I happen to come across this Pastor telling the sad truth about some mothers whom are using their role as the Mother in wrong ways.

I, for one, am a mother of one and I also have siblings whom I am living with together with my family.

What the pastor said about some mothers is partly true as it's a very common kind of thing.

We all have complaints about our mothers , let's accept that and our mothers were not perfect either for they also tend to make mistakes as they're also mere human and not robots. The pastor then point out certain mother behaviors that I often saw and hear a lot these days.

Some mothers tend to:

Let's you save you siblings asses from their own mess

• One particular situation is when your brother/sister are having trouble with her finances as they tend to be gamblers and they we're stuck with their debts and your mother ask you to help them

• When the your sister got pregnant or when your brother made his girlfriend pregnant and your mother ask you to help them shoulder the hospital finances even though you are not of help when their having s3x.

• When your mother would ask you for cash to help your unemployed siblings instead of helping them get a grip and start finding ways to earn

Boast on raising their kids even though she is of no help along the way

• Some mothers just gamble all day and lets their children help themselves in their education else they'll just starve and she can't help them with that but when their children made it and achieve their dream she be telling people that she's the reason why her children became successful.
  ( I had a classmate before and his mother always gamble and even though he's hungry and can't even come to school as he has no food nor allowance but he still come and study, he dreamed of escaping the hell from his mother's grip and luckily through his perseverance he is now a registered nurse working overseas. His mother kept on telling their neighbor about his success although they already know that she's of no help with my classmates success in life)

Always cover up the mistakes of their children even though they are in the wrong

• Not in dramas but in reality, sadly most mothers would go beyond measures just to protect her precious child. Even though the truth is her child's the on doing the wrong deed.

• Instead of disciplining the child, she would find ways to turn the tables and make it so that her child is the victim.

Lastly, playing a victim all the time and point out that you don't know how to give back to the ones who raise you.

• Mother's sometimes would say that it's time for you to take care of them instead as they were the ones who nurture you up until you are capable of living yourself alone but let's your siblings together with their family be included in the package.
  I know some of us here are in a situation where you need to feed your mother and also your in-laws and the kids.

• Saying she sacrificed her youth and mid years just to raise you.
  Well, it's not the child fault that they came to the world earlier that expected, it's because some mothers were careless and only think about lustful activities without minding the consequences and now blaming the child for a sin they didn't commit.

There really are a lot when it comes to behaviors of our mother and we are no different for we also tend to misunderstand their actions or their purpose on doing it.

I am not saying that all mothers are like that still and didn't change. My Mum is not perfect too, she have lapses and we often bicker but we both know that we are still in process of learning on how to get through life. Learning to know your mistakes and to ask for forgiveness is a good practice too.

A mother should be the confidante of the child and not their mortal enemy.

(All stated above are just my mere opinion, any criticism and judgement are well accepted in the comment section)

Thank you for reading!
@mommykim