Dear diary,
I noticed that my mom was acting so strange lately. I mean shes not acting like she used to. She was easily irritated on simple things that we did and I always heard her shouting when my cousin was so hard to please. I know shes been tired of everything in the house. I know shes tired of taking care of me and my cousin. I know shes tired of cleaning our messy house over and over again. I know shes tired when I saw her sitting and wiping her sweat after she finished cooking our lunch. I know shes tired of looking on her cellphone and I always heard on her the word article and publish. I know I didn’t know that thing yet but all I know is that she was happy every night when she heard the sound of a fallen coin like ting! and she told my father than she earned decent amount that night. I also saw her every time she opened her laptop and visit the sunflowers and the sapling and seeing if theres a monster who landed on the land. They called it uwak but I called it monster because that creature has a big eyes and it scares me that’s why I always told my mom to remove those monster who landed on the saplings.
One day I heard them fighting. It was my mom and my dad who making an argument and I heard my mom shouted at my father while crying. I saw my father walked away and didn’t mind my mom that’s why my mom go inside the room and crying. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to make her stop from crying. I am hungry that time and I want some breastmilk so I grab my mom’s boobie. She was still crying while she was nursing me and after I am full I hug her tight. My mom was crying and she hugged me too. She said thank you to me and kiss me on my forehead that’s why I kissed her too and I told her I love you.
Yesterday , my moms seems not okay again. I know shes not okay because I heard her talking to my father. She was worried on us because the rain pour when we were on the way home and she was worried that we might get sick but it ended up shes the one who got sicked.
Shes sick but she still taking good care of us. Shes sick but she still clean the house. Shes sick but she still holding her phone and opening her laptop. She was lying in our bed and told us that shes sick and she please us not to be makulit and just stay on one side. She gave her phone to my cousin and she gave her phone to me so that she can rest.
When dad was arrived , my mom was still not okay. He told my mom to rest and he will be the one who will take good care of us. We leave the bedroom and went to the sala so that my mom can rest in the room. Dad is also the one who clean me and dress me sleep wear. Hes also the one who prepared for our dinner. She bought my mom a medicine and my mom drink that medicine after dinner.
I am already sleepy that time and every night I want my mom on my side for me to sleep but that night my mom was not beside me and dad was the one who sang a lullaby to me. I saw my mom holding her phone and she told me father that she will going to publish an article before she get sleep.
This morning I woke up without my dad on my side. I asked my mom where is he and she said my dad went t the hospital and I asked her if my father is sicked. My mom told me that the eyes of my father is not okay and then I told her she was sick too. She smiled at me and then she greeted me good morning. I hugged her, kissed her and say I love you to her and good morning also.
Like our usual routine, even if shes a little bit sick earlier shes still manage to stand up and prepared for her coffee while facing the laptop while me was eating my cereal. She seems more okay earlier than yesterday but shes not totally okay because I saw it on her face.
Good evening guys. I am not feeling well. I just thought of this topic earlier and thinking if my son already understand that Im not okay and Im sick. That Im stress and I want peace of mind.
take a rest ate yen, hope you'll feel better soon :)