My Childhood Trauma Got Triggered

I am writing this at midnight, March 11, 2022. After I published my article It's Getting Bad, I promised myself not to stay up late at night and to try my best to fix my sleeping routine. I'm about to sleep and then suddenly my cat jumped through the window and entered my room with a rat in her mouth. But before that, I heard a rat squeak. I never thought that Bambi would enter my room through the window with a rat.

I am traumatized while I am typing this on Google docs. I am paranoid by the fact that what if there's a rat that would enter my room? I might just cry if that happens.

Bambi went straight under my bed. I tried shooing her but she was aggressive. I think It's her instinct. I don't know. But the fact that she was under my bed scared me. I can't help not to think that there was a tendency that she would go straight to my bed and devour the rat.

A few minutes later, she left and went under my brother's study table. I got shocked and I almost screamed the heck out of me. At this time, I was already telling myself not to scream because for sure my Mom will get awakened and she will scold me really bad. I was too scared to even look at Bambi. I literally saw the rat's face. She tried leaving the room through the window again but she wasn't able to. The rat was just too big that she couldn't jump on the table. I opened up the door and she walked under my brother's bed and went straight to the door.

I am still scared as of now, shaking and I can't explain my face. It's literally a "mukhang hindi maipinta". But before the incident happened, I went to the bathroom. The lights are turned off since it's already late at night. I haven't even reached the bathroom's door and I stepped onto something. I opened up my phone's flashlight and I saw that I stepped on a shrew. It was a type of rodent. Bambi's kittens were playing with the dead shrew. My foot touched the shrew. It also happened last night, Bambi also killed a shrew and the same incident happened to me.

This incident has triggered my childhood trauma. I'm going to tell you about it since I've already told you what happened earlier. My neighborhood is so clean. Literally clean not until our new neighbors arrived. They are vegetable vendors. Since then, rats have existed in our neighborhood and their population wasn't controlled by cats. I can't blame the rats since veggies are an easy meal for them. But what's worse is that they are also entering our house. Back then our house was not still that good, and rats can easily have an entrance going in our home.

So here's the actual story, I was sitting on the throne (toilet bowl). And then suddenly, a rat fell on me. I was not even a teenager at that time. I was just trying to poop. I screameeeed. I can't even remember the times I shouted Lola and Mama. Since the bathroom door was closed, the rat doesn't have a way out. I kept throwing water at it while I was shouting. I cried and after that, I got a fever. Maybe because of how I was at that moment.

And that's how I started to be afraid of any rodent. Up until now, I didn't have the courage to touch a hamster or a guinea pig. I still have the chills of what happened before.

It's too funny right? But I am not invalidating my fears. There are traumas that we get to carry even until we are already old. We may not like that it happened to us, but it already is.

What's your funny story about rats or can you share a weird traumatizing experience?

Author's Note:

This wasn't supposed to be the one that I will publish today but my adrenaline rush gave me the energy to write about it. Kudos also to my friend Gab for comforting me when I chatted with him right away. Anyways, thank you for reading this!

Check out my other blogs:

• It's Getting Bad

• It's Not Always Glory Days With Readcash

• How My Week Turned Out

• Living With Grief

• How was February to me? A recap.