Marriage Has Become Expensive

31 Article of my journey|22-5-2022

Lead image Unsplash.com (Edited)

Is marriage expensive in your country? Actually I didn't want to write this article but my conscience forced me to write on reality. Sometimes some scenes help the writer to find ideas. I'm trying to put my feelings into words. And maybe I don't think it's a sin to tell the truth. I know it's not easy to be a writer because sometimes the words that come to mind burn the heart. I'm starting to write even though I have to suffer...

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I went to my aunt's house a few days ago. I go to my aunt's house every week her house is not far away but i can't go every day maybe i am lazy. But this week, when I arrived at my aunt's house, I was sad to see the condition there. I didn't know they were in that situation.I could hear my aunt's voice before I opened the door of the house but after I entered that voice disappeared. Maybe she had heard the sound of opening the door (The iron door always makes a sound when opened and closed).

When I entered the room, my aunt, her husband and my aunt's three daughters were sitting holding their heads. They looked at me with very quiet and strange faces. I was also upset to see this because I had never seen them in such a condition before. Every time I entered their house I saw smiles on their faces. But that smile was gone that day.

I greeted everyone as usual and sat down on the corner of the bed. This time in response to the greetings, their voices were muted. I asked my aunt why there is silence in the house today. Instead of answering, they asked me about my health (As you know, I got sick a few days ago). I reassured my aunt about my health.

My aunt's youngest daughter is my age. She winked and told me to go to another room. My cousin and I actually play computer games. When I go to my aunt's house. I got out of bed and went to another room with my cousin because I preferred not to know the reason for the silence from my aunt. Maybe it was appropriate for me to do so because I did not come to disturb them. And I don't think it's right for us to be repeatedly questioned by an elder.

When I asked my cousin the reason for the silence, he told me the whole story. I sat still like an idol for two minutes after hearing my cousin's words. I felt as if I had punished myself knowing the incident. I tried my best to hold back my tears but I failed because I am weak. My innocent cousin's eyes were drowning in a sea of ​​tears that I never wanted.

Those words still ring in my ears

"The parents had arranged the elder sister's engagement in a rich family two years ago. Dad sells vegetables on the wheelbarrow all day and Mom runs the sewing machine day and night. My parents saved money and bought a dowry for my sister. But the other day the boy's family informed my father by phone that if you do not give your daughter four Tola of gold (One Tola is equal to 11.7g) in dowry then we will cancel the marriage. But we have two Tola of gold that my mother got in dowry (Today the price of a Tola in our country is over one hundred and thirty eight thousand). Parents have already bought the rest of the dowry but how can we fulfill their word because now there is nothing in our house that we can sell and buy the rest of the gold.If we don't buy the rest of the gold soon, they will break the engagement. What no parent wants... That is why we are all worried and no one is willing to lend us money".

She was trying to hide the pain but I could hear the faint sound of her broken heart. Even though she was stronger than me.

She added that if my sister's marriage was canceled, she would probably not be able to cope. Then suddenly my aunt's face appeared in the room and we both became speechless. Aunty asked what is being spied on each other. I shook my head in denial. Aunty smiled when she saw this (I know it was a painful smile).

Now I ask you what you would do if you were in my cousin's place? Wouldn't it hurt? Of course you are helpless because you had no other choice. Sometimes life tests us, which we are not expecting. Sometimes every breath of life hurts that makes us feel guilty.

I was wondering how we can be cruel. How long will this oppression continue in our society? How long will the lives of others be played in the name of dowry? This evil tradition has finally thrown the innocent people who have grown up in our society into the well of darkness. Even in our religion Islam dowry has been declared haraam. There is no problem if one gives wealth to one's daughter willingly. But forcing dowry is a very unpleasant act.

I see that the demand for dowry is increasing day by day which has forced the daughters of the poor to be kept under house arrest. Sometimes some customs make the society oppressive which results in burying the lower class alive. If this oppression continues like this, then perhaps the daughters of the poor will begin to feel guilty at home.

A humble message

If you are a boy's parent, don't ask for dowry because some poor people will be heartbroken. It is not our right to ruin a family life. It is our responsibility to protect everyone because we are all created by the same God. There is nothing more precious when they are giving you their daughter. Stay away from bad traditions as they make any society a criminal. Try to follow the Sunnah of the beloved Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) so that you can escape the path of oppression.

Try to follow the right traditions so that our society is safe from future disgrace. Never be greedy because greed kills one's morals. Prefer to be a better person and be a unique character. Every step you take reflects the society because every step taken by the people in the society has significance and impact.

When I asked my aunt what your next step would be, she said softly, "Son, marriage has become expensive". These four words made me hollow inside. I told myself in my heart that marriage has really become expensive. Although marriage is a bond of love which has been replaced by wealth. Dowry really made marriage expensive. Tradition took away the honor of the daughters of the poor. I feel sad because I did not know that marriage has become expensive for the poor. I wish it weren't so...

DISCLAIMER

All the written words are mine. I have written this article based on my personal experience. The purpose of this article is to spread awareness among the people.