Marrying Late An Issue

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2 years ago

I will marry you when I grew up and we will end up together in future. Aww, such sweet words I may have said this to someone I can't remember about her though, lol.

What triggered me to write about this topic is that yesterday I got a wedding card from one of my uncles who is now an adult of 35-38 years of age, I can't confirm it. He is like a bro to me irrespective of the age.

We usually get wedding cards like this.

He works in the medical department as a sort of Assistant in the Pathology Lab and was earning from the year 2012 to 2013 back when I was in my school days. We played cricket with each together as we grew up.

He was given lots of proposals of marriage at a young adult age as he got the job very early but he didn't accept any, the reason is unknown.

So I and my friends decided to congratulate him and we called him in a field nearby to talk and congratulate him. We pulled lots of teasing and jokes, and all of us including him were enjoying each other's company. And out of curiosity, I asked him, why didn't you marry earlier, you had everything? A question which anyone would hate. But since he was an adult already and he knew my motive was to learn something. As I will never push others' buttons, lol if I don't see them as brothers or sisters.

The smiling face turned into a saddening face. He said in a serious tone, listen guys I need to tell you an important life lesson and mistake which you shouldn't do.

He said - I didn't marry early so that I can enjoy my life and save enough money for my family but after hitting the age of 30, not many suitors were accepting his request due to the age gap. Mostly in India majority of people do arrange marriage and he was like a family guy, even if he has some close friends he never thought of them that way.

He said it was a mistake for him to marry late, as now he calculated that he will reach the age of 50 when his children would cross the age of 18. And you know today's people life living in cities isn't more than 60-70 years. He said his sugar level is also in the danger zone. Another thing he mentioned his father is very old now and probably not in the condition to even attend the marriage. His father is in the age of 61. His grandparents won't be able to take care of his children in future as they are already weak and old.

He said he was thinking of living a single life because it's better that way but after the age of 30, his thoughts and mindset changed as if what to do with all this saved up money, he was feeling lonely. He said he was determined earlier but the situations and conditions totally changed his way to live in future.

Final Thoughts

This post isn't pushing you to do marriage, lol. Just sharing with you some words that with time a person's situation and thoughts can change and depending on the situation it can be either bad or good.

To me, the ideal age should be 25-30 for both men and women. But I know unemployed ones can't even dream of it, haha. Because it will become a heavy liability and responsibility if you try to make a family without any daily income.

Living single is peaceful if you have a lively company. Otherwise one may fall into loneliness.

At present we may prefer the single life but we may not enjoy it for longer period in future just like what happened with my friend or uncle, heh-e. So choose your future wisely. Early, late everyone has different choices. This post isn't justifying anything. As in many cases both early and late couples live their best lives.

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2 years ago

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It is false to make conslusion on seeing one man lives my friend. Yeah whether you marry early or late both have pros and cons. So, I believe we must understand each other partnership , we must accept the reality and live on.

In marriage , we can't always search benefits, we need to compromise in some aspects too my dear.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ah yes, I have already said this post is just mere change of thoughts of one's life. I'm not justifying anything on the marriage topic.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Where I come from people merry for love, they don't arrange it, and you can't force love. Someone get married at age of 18, someone at age of 60. There is no rule no we can chose certain things in life, such as when we will die or when we will find perfect person to marry. You can get married at age of 25, have kids and die before your 40. Or you can get married in your 40s and live pass your 80. You can't predict that. That's life. But beside all this, getting married and when and how and will you do it is a PERSONAL choice, there is no rule to follow nor other people opinion is important. I will marry when I want to marry and I don't judge anyone else getting marry when they want. It's frustrating for me to see people thinking they have saying in other peoples personal life, in any way.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ah, what to say. India has a history of practicing arrange marriage and love marriage isn't respected by many people here as people see it an act of foolishness though in recent years people are accepting. I think the reason is as the level of education people get is low. Todays youth is with the love marriage but their father and mother are against it. It's like engraved in people of minds like history and will take time to remove this bug from their mind.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I am aware of arranged marriages there, just never understand it. It's foolish to be with someone you love and be happy? I would be devastated if my parents would like anything less then that for me. I understand there are cultural differences in many countries and I know many, and that's all normal, but arranged marriages I never could. Simply makes no sense to me. But again, if someone likes and wants it, that's their choice and I support it. Otherwise no one should be in position to force you to do anything, let alone such huge life event.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Marriage is a personal decision to make. I have seen so many get into marriage because their friends did, but at the end of it they get into serious problems that developed into filling for a divorce.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I agree. It's common here as well, people get married young and divorce and re-marry. And if I have to say, my opinion is better not to rush it then to regret it, and have children suffer through divorce.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

That's just it. You don't get into what you will not be able to last longer in.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

In m country, a lot of responsible men between that age bracket are willing and ready to get married, but the economic conditions, are not favourable. It's only someone that doesn't have shame that would go ahead and raise up a family he can't carvide for or have any idea of how to support them.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

My question for you is are you married? lol I got married when I was unemployed, and only have faith that God will provide a way of sustenance for us, we are very grateful now that we live better when we are married.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

For some marriage works as a better solution, haha. Maybe in next 7-10 years, before 28 I have planned let's see, what future holds.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Well to me, there's no big deal with marrying late because it's not like it's some kind of achievement. You can even decide not to marry at all, it is your life. Anyways, it's nice meeting you

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Hmm.. I don't have much to say, I once wrote an article title, the right age to get married. To me, my opinion is that, there is no right age to get married, but there are condition to meet to get married, mental, financial, maturity, family and many more, if all this are settled, then one can go into marriage... Like you said, an unemployed people will only be a liability in a marriage..

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I get married at 28, I won't say late as it was in my plan, in my goal plan lol!. Though my bf asked me to marry him at when I was 25 I didn't accept as I am not ready financially. I am still sending my sister in college. She is my priority. I came from not a well off family, so I promise myself not to have children until I am sure I could provide for them, I don't want my future kids to experience what I had experienced. Yet, it was in my plan to have a baby at 30. I have two years right? Sadly God didn't blessed me😬. Now at 32, I was thinking how I wish I got married at 25,lol!

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Sometimes our calculations and situations doesn't go like excepted. Everything will fine, keep on trying.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Hmmm. I actually disagree with you a bit. Marrying late could be an issue depending on how you look at it. Same with marrying at an early age.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Absolutely, it's completely individual and personal thing, and it's no issue no matter when it happens.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Ah, no I do mean it that way. It's just words of different person. Obviously we should prefer the correct and mid age not early not late.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Not a problem friend. I understood the message you were trying to pass across completely

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Basically, I cannot advise anybody to marry early of lat. It depends on you. Are you mentally and financially capable? If yes, you can go for it I hope we all party the right person

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I think getting married at an early age is a good decision because when responsibilities hit hard humans automatically focus on earning money more than anything to give their family a better life

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I have seen some bunch of alcoholic and drugged people turning into a complete Saint after marriage, haha.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I am in favor of early marriage as late wedding make you old also. I mean young can enjoy the wedding time while old with many diseases can't. Don't take it joke brother. But I shall married to handsome Guy next year. I agreed to your Uncle" words he shared his whole experience.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Sometime when you decide to get marriage early is beneficial some times you enjoy all the moment of life.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I'm already 26 now, and for some, maybe this could be the ideal age to settle down and get married, but for a certain reasons, and as for me as a breadwinner of the family, I'd rather choose to be more stable first to get married, and the fact that having a family is a big responsibility, so everyone must be ready about it.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Personally, I wish to marry as early as I can so I can fend for my family in my youthful age. But financial security is also important too.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Early marriage is the best, my view though. A lot of demerits are attached to late marriage, thanks for sharing this with us

$ 0.00
2 years ago

A person never gets satisfies from his life, either he does marriage in early age like us, or do it it later. We as a couple thinking that we should get stable more before marriage but we did it already. We are married now and are in financial crises these days.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

For some it really became an issue to get marry late but a person should marry when he is ready to take responsibilities

$ 0.01
2 years ago