The Heavy Burden Of Every First Born Filipino Child

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Avatar for Sydney2
2 years ago

Philippines is known for being a family-oriented country where the whole family loves to live and stay in the same house together. We always put the family at the core of everything. One must not leave the other one struggling. All must stick together through the good times and the bad times.

One thing that the world doesn't even know about is that it is very difficult when you are the first born child of a Filipino family because you are destined for something. Eldest children are born with responsibility laid in their hands. They are the ones who sacrifice for the whole family without any complain.

They are the sole breadwinner of the family

Almost all of the Filipino first born child are breadwinner. They are the one who work to support the family. Sometimes they have to work far away especially overseas in order to totally support the whole family. They are the one who provide financial support to their family. Especially to the education of the siblings, it is the role of the first born child to support the education of the whole family. There are so many first born child who have supported their whole siblings to graduate in college. This is very heart-warming. If the parents failed to support their children's education, the first born child didn't.

The success of the family lies in their hands

If you are a first born Filipino Child, you cannot avoid being pressured because your family relies in you. If you do not strive harder in life, you cannot lift your whole family up however, if you work harder and become successful, your family will also be successful because you are capable to support them in different ways. If you will not strive harder, your family will also lose its way. Think about a lamp post, without it the street will be so dark. This is how the success of the family relies in the first born child. You are the light in the midst of the darkness.

They are the most responsible child

Most of the first born Filipino child are responsible. They are the most hardworking people you'll ever meet and they tend to focus more in working rather than giving themselves some time because they know their family's future lies in their hands. They need to be strong because their family are waiting. They need to be brave because their family really need them. They need to be the most responsible person in this world. They are the hero of the family.

They give everything that they can even it means nothing left for themselves

If you are the first born child in the family, you need to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of your family. Even it means giving all your hard earned money for the needs of the family and nothing is left for your personal needs. This is the reality for every first born child. They have learned to be patient and understanding all the time. They prioritize family over anything else.

Should the parent let their first child shoulder the world?

Sadly, this is the mindset for many Filipino parents. For them, it is necessary for the first born child to work and support the whole family. If you chose to live on your own without helping your family, you will be called selfish for prioritizing yourself first before your siblings. There's really nothing helping your family but it is so wrong when the parents responsibility are transferred to the first child. I hope every Filipino parents will realize that their eldest child is not the worker of the family.

It is the sad reality here in Philippines. When you are the first born child, it seems like you are carrying the whole world in your shoulder. You have to study very well and work harder because your family 's fate and success are on your hands. If only this mentality will end, there are no first born that will suffer from this kind of fate. I believe it's not bad to help your family but putting the responsibilities in your side is what I can say unrighteous. Every first born child also deserves to enjoy and be happy in life without thinking that they have the biggest responsibility laid in this world. I hope the present generation will break this chain.

August 04, 2022

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Avatar for Sydney2
2 years ago

Comments

This is sad, sometimes I feel sorry to those who are "forced" to do so and set aside their own dreams. What is maddening is when their own families abuse them and just rely on them even when they are healthy and able enough to work and do something too. I'm thankful though that in my family, such is not the case. Siguro depende sa kinagisnan din...

$ 0.00
2 years ago

You are very lucky to grow in a family na hindi makaluma at sarado yung pag-iisip. I believe everything happens for a reason din, dahil sa kasipagan ng mga breadwinner naging successful sila sa buhay.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Thank you Sydney, we owe everything from our parents who did their best :) Pero nakakaawa din talaga yung mga panganay na sa kanila lahat....

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Such an excellent content, Sydney! Totoo 'to and sad to say, this is the reality. Some parents passing their responsibilities to their child, and most of the time is the 'panganay'. Kaya 'yung ate ko kapag dumating na 'ko sa college and pag-aaralin n'ya 'ko, ayoko. As long as kaya kong tulungan sarili ko, gagawin ko. Ayoko na mag suffer siya sa burden na dapat ang magulang namin ang may responsibilidad. Anyway, to all 'panganay' out there at the ' tumatayong panganay', i'm sending warm hugs to each of you with consent! May your burden turn into achievements. I would like to thank to all of you, thank you so much and cheer up!

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ako pangalawa ako sa aming magkakapatid, yung kuya ko ang panganay at breadwinner namin siya. Thankful ako na may public college kasi kung wala, ayaw ko isipin na dagdag pabigat sa responsibilidad ng kuya ko. Alam mo yung kuya nasa abroad nagtatrabaho para mapaayos bahay namin, halos mag-iisang taon na yung bahay namin di pa rin tapos. Nakakaawa lang na kailangan niya kumayod ng todo para mapagawa bahay namin.

Yung mga 90s parents, ganyan talaga mga mindset nila na dapat yung anak yung mag-aahon sa buong pamilya. Ang mga millennial parents ngayon, di na ganyan mag-isip. They plan their child and gusto na nila putulin yang mindset na "child is an investment." Ang mahalaga naeeducate na ang mga new generations today about parenthood. I am positive na mapuputol na tong sumpa.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

yess. hindi na talaga mababago 'yung mga paniniwala ng mga 90's gen. they're an actually stuck up na doon sa paniniwalang gano'n. mga millennials nalang 'yung may malaking chance na putulin 'tong ancient beliefs. ang toxic talaga, hoping na after decades ay maraming nag grow at naputol na 'yung such toxic culture ng mga Filipino. Anyways, loved your content! Thanku for this!

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Maraming salamat sa pag appreciate sis! Yung mga 90s parent kasi sarado yung utak saka mostly sa kanila di nakapagtapos at maagang nagpamilya kaya may kakulangan talaga sa kanilang parental development. Halos lahat ng millennials ngayon educated at sila pa yung open yung utak sa mga ideas at suggestion. May future yung bansa natin trust it ✨🙌

$ 0.00
2 years ago

totoo, open-minded na mostly of millennials right now bcs of modernization and technology. madali rin ma-educate and ma-enlighten, minsan pa nga kami pa 'tong lumalapit para ma-educate and ma-enlighten. it's just a reflection of kabataan ang pag-asa ng bayan.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Tama. Mas maganda yung mindset ng mga kabataan, realtalk to kaya nga sa election, mas madaming alam yung mga kabataan kesa sa mga nakakatanda. Ang kabataan ang pag-asa ng Bayan. 🙌

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Whilst we appreciate and give our sympathy to those first born child, we also should appreciate and give our sympathy to those child who may not be the first born, but acts and stands as one. There are also some first born children who do not behave in a homologous way. It's so brilliant of you for opening this up! For sure, a lot of people can really relate to this article of yours.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Yes that's true. I also salute to those people that even they're not the first-born child, they chose to carry the responsibilities and they are the most responsible daughter/son.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I'm not the eldest, pero parang ako na yung tumayong panganay. Maaga nag-asawa mga older siblings ko kaya lahat ng responsibilities ako na ang sumalo. Nkakapressure, minsan parang bawal magpahinga, at bawal magreklamo. Nakakpagod pero masaya sa pakiramdam kapag naibibigay mo lahat ng needs nila, kahit ubos na ubos ka na :(

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Wow I'm so proud of you Teacher Lyn, saludo ako sa inyo. Napakabuti mong anak dahil di mo iniisip na pabigat yung pamilya mo.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Totoo nga yan Sydney ang hirap pag panganay ka kasi parang hawak mo lahat ng responsibilities. Breadwinner ka. Minsan may napipressure dahil may parents din talaga na ipinapadama sa mga anak na i-pressure sa mga responsibilities which is hindi talaga maganda.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Kaya nakakalungkot na ganito yung culture sa bansa natin. Di naman masama ang tumulong pero yung ilipat ang lahat ng responsibilidad sa anak, parang di na yan fair.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Yan yung di maganda sa IBANG pamilya ginagawa bilang retirement plan mga anak nila mas lalo na yung panganay. I'm the second child yet I feel the burden from my brother feel ko yung hirap nya most especially working student siya nag aaral sa umaga tapos sa gabi nagtatrabaho.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Kaya sana baguhin na ng mga pilipino yung mentality na dapat yung anak ang bubuhay sa buong pamilya balang araw. Ako pangalawa din ako and alam ko magiging breadwinner din ako madami akong bunsong kapatid pa.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

You'll feel the burden upon seeing your older siblings in these kind of situations. But you won't totally feel how it really is kung 'di ka panganay or breadwinner, that's one of the facts.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Yes totoo yan but even though I'm not the first child, I still feel that I will become a breadwinner one day dahil marami pa akong nakababatang kapatid.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I think that's a sad truth about Filipino's first child. It hurts to think it and practice it the same way

$ 0.00
2 years ago

True. Parang naging culture na sa bansa natin na kapag panganay ka, dapat ikaw yung bubuhay sa buong pamilya one day.

$ 0.00
2 years ago