@Princessbusayo
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His Ego ruined it all.
*“When the ego is with you then your heart becomes like sick.”* Quote Source https://www.statusb4u.com/2020/09/ego-status-quotes.html?m=1 Many things are happening in this life and it's good to pay attention to those things so we can learn from them and be able to apply them in our lives and eliminate the bad ones we don't want. Marriage is fragile, just like women which should be handled with wisdom and care and also to know the right thing to do and not to do. Marriage is sweet but with the right person, even though there's no guarantee that there will always be a happy moment, challenges would suffice but being with the right partner wouldn't call for divorce or abuse of any sort but both partners would come together to solve it without the third party or fifth columnist. I read @HappyBoy article about "Happy Ever After?" The part I read which reminds me of a movie I watched and would love to narrate to you was where he mentioned Men's Ego. He attended a program and learnt that some men wouldn't even want their wives to work or earn more than they do. https://read.cash/@HappyBoy/happy-ever-after-87292bdc Some men want to be superior and do not want their wives to progress more than them because they believe or assume if they do, they will be treated lowly by their wives. This is not so with all women, especially if it is a woman who loves and humbles her husband. There is no crime with your wife earning more than you, it's all about unity and love. If you love each other, both of you wouldn't have any cause to hate another of his or her progress as long as you guys are in agreement. This man promised to sponsor his wife to be for her Masters once they get married. This lady insisted on going for her Masters before getting married and making sure to achieve all her dreams, but the man's promise to her made her trust him. The love grew and flourished even while dating which made the woman believe he would fulfill her dreams and not become a full house wife. After they got married, the man stopped her from working, he didn't fulfill his promise of sending her to do her Masters. He believed he was capable of taking care of her being a full house wife. This lady would beg her husband to allow her work so she doesn't have to keep requesting for money from him but he declined. He would always go on business trips and most times wouldn't come home for months and he never bothered sending money to her. He was intentional in his plans for her by not giving her money and was selfish to even calculate foodstuffs and give her the actual money for them. He didn't allow her to take care of herself other than the only daughter they had. He was happy doing this and it always made her sad. Still, she never stopped respecting and loving him. She was ridiculed by her friends and this made her get angrier but despite that, she never stopped showing respect and care. She was always submissive. There was a day the man traveled as usual and didn't drop any money for her, believing the foodstuffs in the house would be enough for her and the daughter till he returns. One night, thieves came to rob them and when they didn't find any money, they shot the wife. The guy came back from his business trip and went to the hospital. The lady lamented how he was not there for her. How he shattered her dreams and didn't fulfill his promise of sending her to do her Masters. She became the object of ridicule among her friends. As she was saying all these, the man was crying and promised to change and allow her further her education but it was too late as she gave up the ghost. I felt for the lady because it is what is happening in the world. Some men think they are in control and are afraid of allowing their wives do better than them. Why wouldn't you be happy your wife is doing fine? If both of you really come together to understand things, there wouldn't be hatred among each other. Your happiness should be to see your partner doing well and always pray for their success and not shattering their dreams because you **assume** they would act superior over you. Though some women are at fault too but why wouldn't you be submissive? The Bible says that husbands should love their wives, wives should be submissive to their husbands. These are part of the ingredients of a successful marriage. Love and Submission between both partners. When there is love, every other thing wouldn't be difficult because you will find yourself enjoying your life. If you love, would you want to see others falling down? If you love, would you want to kill another fellow? If you love, would you want to have bad thoughts against another? Love is the greatest of all things in this life because when you love, there is no length to the sacrifice you will make for another and the good part is that you will always be happy at each other's progress. Marriage should be all about love and unity. Marriage should involve understanding each other. Talk about things together and solve the issues amicably. Drop your ego and focus on doing the right thing. Learn to appreciate each other's success especially as husband and wife. Thanks for reading Thank you @foryoubtc09 for renewing your sponsorship. I really appreciate it. Image by Tom on Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/T5lmpSYxnSU [May 03, 2022] (No 123 article for the year)
33 comments
I agree with you princess Busayo marriage should be with love and unity . I also goes with you with what you said" some men don't want they women to be more successful than them " . marriage is a union the best thing to achieve a peaceful marriage is to achieve success together
Yes, there is nothing bad in achieving success together and make your marriage sweet and lovely.
This is really a heart-rending story. I guess the man would never be able to forgive himself again. Knowing that his wife was not happy with her m before death
Exactly. He can never forgive himself because it's something he will keep regretting.
A lot of men have been brought up to see women as their subordinates. When they pay the bride price, they see the woman as a their 'property', so they can do with as they see fit.
That's total shit my friend. Bride price doesn't mean you should start maltreating your woman the way you want. It's uncalled for.
Hopefully, they understand that.
This is indeed an issue nowadays Princess. For that men who are afraid of alpha women should not date any woman at all. A man should support his partner or leave her alone. There are only two choices. Same goes for men.
Exactly. If men are thinking of such, it is better not to marry any woman at all. We all have choices. Either to marry and stop those false belief or support your partner so nothing would happen. Thank you 😊
This what is really happening in most marriage in our world today most husband are afriad to marry a wife who are more advance than them both academically and financially, I had a very good mature man saying that he can never married a woman who has money more than him and or a woman who is more expose in education more than him, that if he marries such woman that he will not be the one controlling her that she will be the one trying to control him because of her money and the exposure she has in education. But to me it's not everything they say that is true because i have seen so many women that have money and yet they're very submissive to their husband.
We cannot judge all women because there are still the good ones who are submissive even when they are more advanced than the man. It's all about trust, love and understanding. Thank you for your contribution.
Alright, you are welcome friend.
The ego breaks everything, from the moment you do everything to satisfy an unscrupulous part of yourself for the benefit of the suffering of others, it already means that the ego is not a good way to do things.
The ego will destroy such a person someday if he or she isn't careful to change. Thank you 😊
Doing courtship we men love promising heaven and earth. I've seen a similar case to this. The woman was young with just o'level but her husband promised that he will sponsor her to the Uni immediately after marriage, even before they start having kids. The man didn't do as he promised and even call the lady illiterate , Lazy fool and other names. They've separated now with the two going with a kid but the woman is now hustling selling different things, her dream of going to school is now dead and buried.
Can you see? That is so unfair of men who don't keep to their promise. Do you know I watched something similar to it yesterday where the lady owns a big mansion and also a doctor. The guy lied he had a mansion too but got burnt. He hastened her for them to get married quickly. Immediately they got married, he started unleasing his habit of drinking and smoking in the lady's house and even had the gut to bring in another wife. So wicked of him. He already ruined her life because she committed murder and was imprisoned.
Though i'm a guy, i'm sometimes ashamed of the things my Gender do.
The Bible says that two can not work together without having one mine,a man who truly love her wife supposed not to be angry about her wife progress, one of my friend,her wife is a medical doctor and the husband is a Keke Rider,both of them love each other,no quarrel at all, they leave like brother and sister, when husband and wife loves their self, such attitude will not take place.
You are right. When true love exist among them, what would make them hate another and not want to progress? I love the couple you narrated of. That means there is love and understanding between them. Thank you for stopping by.
If a man decide that the woman should not work and he's capable for providing for the need of the family, there's nothin wrong with it... I've seen such home and only in movies though 🥱. But to be sincere, it's still somehow to me to pin a wife at home and not doing anything. It's just someone
Abi oo, na movies we dey watch but they happen in reality too 😁😁 No one can tie me down oo 😅
Ego and pride are destructive human factors. We should be humble but nice in attitude. Without good life partner, we human are incomplete. So we should be humble to our partner by sacrifice of our ego and pride.
Oh my friend! Been a while I have seen you around. How are you doing? Thank you for coming around my post.
I was kinda busy in routine life. Just I found holidays for good interaction here as a blessing. Thank you too for asking.
As I have commented there, it's not about money. It's not a competition. A relationship is about understanding and keeping it. Working in unison and doing what it takes to make it work and not competing with each other.
That is it, Article! It is all about understanding and being committed and not about competing with one another. As long as you guys are joined together, you are one. I hope they understand. Thank you so much.
Exactly! Love and submission should be the key ingredients of a happy marriage. I felt sorry for the wife and that particular situation is happening in real life. I hope and pray that God will give me such a loving and humble man in the near future🙏
Amen my friend. May God give us an understanding and loving man who wouldn't shatter our dreams. Thank you
Many females of the society lost their economical life because of their man aren't support them because they don't have women empowerment mindset
Yes, it's everywhere and also sad because men aren't helping their women gain freedom in that aspect.
Thank you for sharing it Princess and good morning. This is true - more often than not, men tend to focus on the "submit to your spouse" mindset only thus become demanding and controlling to their wives. They forget the part wherein they should love their wives as they love themselves. Not sure if how everything goes - but during marriage preparation seminars it is deeply discussed and informed by the minister about everything in life and the role of everyone in the marriage. Everyone wins if they follow it thoroughly. In our case with my wife, currently she is the one taking care of the household. It was a mutual decision as we have a daughter who is turning 1 year old this 1st of June. She is not working thus financial responsibility is on me. BUT her workload is way harder than mine, and we talked about it over and over again and she said that it is okay not to pursue her career for now as she wants to enjoy motherhood and see all the milestones that our child would have. I guess proper communication will be a deal breaker to the ego.
This is interesting. Firstly, I love how you took the time to make this comment. Secondly, you are very right with all you said which sums up to having proper and smooth communication between both partners because this will make peace reign and understanding would be grounded. I wish your baby a happy one year birthday in advance 😎
Thank you for those compliments, I enjoyed writing that comment though I felt that it was quite lengthy haha. That is something that we noticed as a husband and wife in some of marriages that crumbled down that we are aware of. We are not saying that ours is a perfect one and we also have our days as such. But we try to be always level-headed with each other. I guess since we are so familiar on how each of us navigates each emotion it was quite easy for us in transitioning.