False Positivity.

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Avatar for MissJo
Written by
2 years ago

Hello beautiful people!

I hope you all are doing fine amidst of the shortcomings and uncertainties we may feel day by day. Always remember that a positive life is a happy life. ✨


“When we push aside difficult emotions in order to embrace false positivity, we lose our capacity to develop deep skills to help us deal with the world as it is, not as we wish it to be.” Susan David, Ph.D, Mindful


"Wag ka ng umiyak. Okay lang yan."

"Parang yun lang. Be positive."

"Tara alis tayo para mawala yung lungkot."

"Wag kang magmukmok diyan, di yan makakatulong."

Most of the times, these are the usual phrases we hear from our close friends, family, or anyone who we ask for advice if we are going through something. May it be a heartache, failure on exams and jobs, and sometimes just the feeling of emptiness. We tend to ask for advice, for what things we can do to outdo this sad feeling.

Personally, I do not listen to anyone who says such things I mentioned above. I appreciate them for staying by my side and listen to my rants. But the more they tell me to just stay positive and be happy and just do not think about it will actually worsen my situation. I used to embrace the pain until it hurts no more. Then I'll get healed.

Maybe we have a different ways on dwelling with pain, but I really believe that we really need to let out we really feel. Cry if we really need to. And ask for a companion if necessary. The more we act okay even if we are not, the more the pain will pain us.

We can always acknowledge that human as we are, we have feelings which means we can get hurt and its okay. Be hurt. But always make sure to not drown into the pain. Be hurt. But always look for ways to get out of the pain. Be hurt. But always think that it is not painful forever.

And as what Susan David, the more we hide what we truly feel the more we can't learn how to deal with pain. With that said, we can't be able to fight for more painful things and we will be instilled with these false positivities that will hurt us more.

Life has never been perfect. We really can feel pain, disappointment, tears, and all. We will lose someone and something. We will feel that we are being played. Honour such experiences as it will make us stronger. Again life has never been perfect, but its imperfection makes it wonderful. Its imperfection makes it more exciting. And its imperfections makes life worth living.


That's all for today beautiful people. If you have any thoughts about this, feel free to leave it in the comment section below. Let's interact. Stay safe always! Xoxo ✨☺️

- MissJo 💜

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Written by
2 years ago

Comments

Letting go of any toxic friendship and crying when you're in pain is what I'm learning this year because I've noticed it is okay to cry, it doesn't make you a weak person. It only makes you stronger for what's to come next

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2 years ago

Kapoy nasad bayag hilak usahay bii. Maghilum hilum nalang jud ko ani haha kay kapoy na pero laban ra gihapon.

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2 years ago

Kapoy kaayo gyud mii, pero mas ma heal gyud ko if makahilak ko haha

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2 years ago

Unsa man imo gihilakan previously deay bii?

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2 years ago

Wala man mii. Kadtong mga before pa na hilak haha

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2 years ago

Aw abi ko haha

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2 years ago

I just process all the hurt and pain and I will be fine. Minsan din nagiisip ako ng ikakalungkot ko hehe. Hindi ko rin maiwasan kasi. Pero gayun pa man e, let us not be devoured by these thoughts.

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2 years ago

Same tayo. I feel the pain until it hurst no more talaga ako eh. Tas nakakahelp talaga siya sakin.

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2 years ago

That's why mandin if I'm in pain tas di ako mapaiyak, sinasaktan ko self ko by imagining things na makakapag palala ng feelings ko. It helps a lot coz maya maya lang iiyak na ako nyan then mas magiging okay na ako. Ung iba hindi iniiyak, ako mas pinapaiyak ko pa ang sarili ko to let it all out. Kasi if diko gagawin, baka namaj mabuang ako.

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2 years ago

Sameeee ate. Mas okay kasi yung napapalabas talaga natin eh. The more kinikimkim, the more na masakit talaga.

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2 years ago

Kaya minsan, i prefer to stay quiet and say no words. Lalo na if wala naman akong magandang sasabihin or i aadvice. I'll just stay by their sides and cry with them. Never invalidate your feelings. Embrace the paim until it hurts no more.

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2 years ago

Yeees! Agree ko ani beb! All feeling are valid baya gyud.

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2 years ago

Imperfection makes us all perfect! I don't know what I am saying but this is the case, we all have imperfections and no one is perfect, we are just perfect for someone who appreciates us. If you are happy, be happy and sometimes pretending will hurt us more.

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2 years ago

Yes! Agree. Pretending to be happy will hurt us more. Why not get hurt and get over it. It is way much better.

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2 years ago

I agree with you sis! Thats what also my side whenever I feel sad. I dont need others opinion I just feel the pain inside of me. Naiintindihan kita na minsan d sya pwdeng sabihin na okay lng yan, positive, fighting it was a common words always. Ung feeling na d sya pwd ganun nlng eh kailangn mo dn damdamin kng gaano un kasakit. Hahah humuhugot pro totoo yan!

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2 years ago

Diba, it is better gyud to feel the pain until it hurts no more.

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2 years ago

I guess people just say that because they don't really know what to say to comfort you. And maybe they just want to let you sort it out by yourself and not be confused with different advices from them. But then again, in the end....only we can make ourselves heal and feel better.

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2 years ago

Agreed. The decision to heal is really on us.

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2 years ago