One of my favorite thing to do during my leisure time is to look for more interesting things that can help me in Pinterest. For those who are not familiar with Pinterest, then this is an app in which you can see the photos and videos of many subjects; if you want educational, cooking recipe, memes, guide for art and more. But then one that catch my attention while scrolling earlier is a photo asking, "How are you, really?"

As I've read "How are you", I immediately said "I'm fine", but when the question "really?" added, I pause for a moment asking, "wait? Am I really okay or just it's the easiest answer I can say?"

It's been so long the last time I ask myself, although I know how important self-care and self-reflection is. But have you asked yourself is you're really okay? In physical, social, mental, emotional and spiritual?

It is true that it's easy for us to say "I'm okay", than saying what we really feel, and to be honest it's rear to have someone who will care on how we are. Just recently when I've watched a video in Tiktok about a mother who is crying while sharing what happened to her son. That according to her, she so busy at work that she don't give enough time to ask if her son is okay, she just let her son use mobile phone, for the reason that it's pandemic and he only need to stay at home. Not until now, that she observed that her son cannot see clearly, they went to the doctor and discover that her son in now having problem with his eye sight. Good thing that she consult the doctor early, because there's a big tendency for the child to be blind. In this case, we can see that the main problem is the child's habit of using phone too much, but if we look deeper, the child won't be in this situation if the parents give him a quality time, asking what he wants, asking if he is still okay. I know that the mother loves her son so much, I can feel that she felf guilty and sad about what happened, but to give a reminders for all the parents to ask your kids if they are really fine.

Asking "How are you?" is the same as "Are you okay?"

Have you tried that no matter how hardly you hide the sadness, still it comes out? Just like my bestfriend, we are having fun, but I know to myself that she's not fully okay as her boyfriend broke up with her, but I never ask how's her condition because we are surrounded with our other friends, and she's not yet comfortable to share the status of her relationship. But in just for a moment, when one of my friend, notice that there's something wrong with her, he immediately hold her hand and ask "Are you okay?", after hearing those words, she immediately cry so hard, that we don't know how to make her stop.

As I've said, it's rear to find someone who will ask our condition. Same as those who are experiencing anxiety or depression. There are two types of faces that you can see, the one who's problem can be seen in her face, and the one who look happy and fun but hiding the pain inside. In most cases, those who looks happy end up negatively, because no one sees the real feelings and situation that they are fighting for.

What we need to do is to embrace how valuable and uniquely beautiful we are. In reality, the only person who care and always be there is just yourself. Better to make a pause and ask yourself; Am I really okay?

Help yourself to be the better version of your being. Listen to yourself as you cannot lie to yourself. If you're not fully okay then help yourself to be fine, no matter how we try our best to make everything around us fine, if we to ourself is not, then everything will turns out negatively, still. So be okay, be fine.

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August 8, 2022

-Ling01