Unwritten rules

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2 years ago

PUBLISHED:27/09/2021

PUBLISHER:JUMPER01

Have you ever heard of the word girls code or boys code. These are some essential rules that males and females live by that aren’t really rules because there isn’t a specialized body set-up to enforce them, also they aren’t taught or given to you by a person it is assumed you just know them by existing. The demerit of these rule is if broken you would suffer the consequences, and who would be make you suffer the consequences? you might ask .. well THE SOCIETY.

Hi it’s jumper here again, I hope everyone is doing great today, it’s been a very wonderful week and I am so ecstatic to bring you another write up. For new and old subscribers please do check out my sponsors 👇🏻 they mean the world to me.

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Without wasting much of your reading time let’s dive into the conversation..

Many a person would argue that women and men are the same in all rights and ramifications which .. might be or not be true, be that as it may nobody can argue with the fact that both genders handle situations differently. I would try to be careful with this part of the article so as not to spark up controversy ; having in mind that this is not my main point. You see men and women are built alike but the different when it comes to certain issues that concern the society. let me explain.

I read an article the other day by @HappyBoy where he talked about some certain topics like having a best friend from the opposite gender even though you have a spouse . He went further to ask ; can I lady be polygamous?that question caught my attention. I would leave a link at the end of this article so you can check it out too; after reading that article I felt the need to write on this topic..

“Things you shouldn’t do as a man”…

Image source: unsplash

Notice I used a quote; well as men we aren’t expected to show emotions no matter how much or how strongly we feel it. Emotions like heartbreak or pain. You see 90% of times a man shows pains or cries they are generally perceived as weaker men. This is because men are built to be physically stronger compared to the female gender so showing emotions like the opposite gender is a No-No.

Finance..

As a man your wife or spouse is not allowed to have more wealth or receive a higher pay than you do . Even though this might be true in certain relationships when there is lack of structure and because the male-figure is generally viewed as the provider, I have never seen a rule book that states that this isn’t allowed in relationships. I think it just depends on the structure, trust , love and respect on which the relationship is built.

Can a man be polygamous?

Well, a lot of people would argue and say men are polygamous by nature maybe we are maybe we are not I feel it all boils down to choice. From a very younger age most male children are encouraged by their uncles or dads to go for any girl they fancy, might be two, three or fours. In-fact a male who is able to woo 3 to 4 girls at a time is considered a very smart man. Our community celebrate these kinds of things. That is why in certain traditions and religions a man is allowed to marry more than one wife.

Can a woman be polygamous?

Most women would say they are “sexually liberated” which is fine by the way I am all for that, it’s just can a lady really make it public that she is with a lot of men ?

let’s do a little social experiment;

say your boy child comes home and tells you he just had his first s*x with a girl, some parents would be like “ oh wow 🤩 how was it ? Hope you were protected ? And hope you got her flowers afterward ?” Now backup.

your girl child comes home and tells you “ hey dad I just lost my virginity”😹😹😹 think of how you would react. I think I have been able to drive home my point.

Even though most people would argue a woman can not really be polygamous. This is why society has thought us… like I said unwritten rules. No one would want to be with a woman that has been with a lot of men in the past but you sure can’t say that for a man. It is a different ball game entirely in fact most women would tell you they want a man who is already taken.
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Another aspect …

Should your spouse have a bestie of the opposite gender ?

In the generation we live in today the word “bestie” can means an entirely different thing so it boils down to why ? And what kind of relationship they have. Personally I am a very jealous lover so if I was presented with this question my answer would be “Noooooooo” because I want to be the friend, lover and every other thing in between but most people are not like me they allow it. Anyways if you find yourself in such situations there are several rules that guide it

  1. Make sure you are friends and even best friends with this other person this will give them a lesser chance to betray you seeing that they would see you as a friend or might feel guilt if they try to make passes at your spouse.

    I know I know I am good 🤩🤩..

  2. Make sure you set boundaries and lines to their relationship: you could talk to your spouse about it and have him or her tell the other person in a calm manner.

  3. Do not show signs of insecurity it can be very disadvantageous and can begin to put ideas in their head if they don’t have those ideas before.

  4. This is the best rule be like me say “ no to besties of the opposite gender”😹😹.

There are actually a lot of rules concerning our society today which I want to address on this article but right now I am having a bit of writer’s block . So let’s see maybe I would make a part 2.

This is @HappyBoy ‘ article I talked about earlier here. Do visit.

Thank you as always for your support and time

Peace and joy ❤️

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2 years ago

Comments

Polygamy in women actually do exist in some cultures in India, they call it polyandry. But is it normal? I guess we will call it abnormal because it's something we aren't used to

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Yes and because our society would frown at it in this part of the world.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I'm a jealous lover and can't give a chance for my spouse to key into bestie. Not me!

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2 years ago

Maybe I will work with friend and not bestie that word though too intimate....but better understanding should do the trick, we live in a world where too much of everything is bad so there is this feeling towards such act.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I know right thanks for your contribution odogwu

$ 0.00
2 years ago

It's a No-No for me as well on the bestie part. And luckily, my husband don't have that as well. His bestfriends are all boys.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Yeah exactly if I got married my wife’s besties would be all female

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2 years ago

yeah..I am not in favor of a wife or a husband having besties of their opposite gender

$ 0.00
2 years ago

hehe, this kind of topic can cause problems but I am glad you mellowed it down. Nice one!! There is a reason we are of different gender but we shouldn't say one is better than the other. We need both genders to survive!!

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Exactly I tried as much a possible to keep it of controversy 😹😹 it is a very sensitive one thank you for reading .

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2 years ago

My wife can never have a bestie of the opposite gender or else we will have to divorce because I know how guys nowadays can behave. Moreover, bestie of opposite side when you are married, why do you still have to keep that after marriage. I am a jealous type and will never allow that. My wife can have more money than I do but it is base on our understanding and love though.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Exactly a man like me 🎉cheers

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Cheers 🍻🍻

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2 years ago

The example of the son and daughter still got me thinking.

Anyways we all have our lives to live and it a choice for everyone to make.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Thanks for the mention and reference bro, the analogy you gave made me laugh. Also, i don't see anything bad in it when the woman earns more than the man . It shouldn't be a big deal at all.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

It shouldn’t but let face the fact in our society today a lot of men wouldn’t like for their wives to have more money than they have 💀😹😹

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2 years ago

I hate the fact that men practicing polygyny are praised while women practicing polyandry are shamed, double standards right there

$ 0.02
2 years ago

It’s the way the society is structured dear.. that is why it is an unwritten rule

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2 years ago