RANT: Thesis Gone Wrong

030502022

Who's at fault here?

Yesterday was our final thesis defense, as I have shared with you guys. I invested my time, money, and effort into our thesis paper just to finish everything and present it to the panelists all done. 

But then everything crumpled to pieces. It felt like we were being betrayed by them. We can't help but feel played around by them. It's unfair, totally unfair. 

I was hesitant to publish this, but I don't have someone to let my rant out. This is the only platform that I can express all my emotions. The only platform that understands what I feel. You're the only people that I feel comfortable sharing my rants with. I'm comfortable because there will be no judgment. Well, I guess there is, but at least we're all strangers here, so it's totally fine with me since you guys don't know me personally. 

So here it is. This is what happened yesterday that literally worsened my depression. 

Two consecutive weeks of sleepless nights, where the maximum amount of sleep that I got was only 5 hours of sleep. I gave all of my efforts and time to our thesis. I even sacrificed my meal just to give more focus on our thesis. 

We were informed five days before our defense by our adviser, so we only had five days to finalize everything, so we did everything to support our thesis. We're done with the survey and everything the day before our defense, so we're basically all ready with our thesis paper. My group mates even suggested that we volunteer to be the first presentor. We're all excited and ready to present. We are confident that we can nail it off during our thesis defense. Our confidence level was so over the top. 

Our adviser then gave the numbers of each presentors, and we were the second ones to present. When the first one presented their thesis, they were kind of off. Their thesis paper was unfinished, and they were literally not ready yet, so they were given another week to finish everything. Then our turn was up and we started to present our thesis paper. I was the one who opened and welcomed the presentation. I was so confident and presented everything in our power point presentation. When we were done presenting our PowerPoint, we then prepared ourselves for the questions. But, we didn't expect what happened next.

After our presentation, the first sentence that we heard from one of the panelists was, "You'll need to go back from the start," and we were like, "WTF?!" What was that? Are you freaking serious? We were dumfounded about what he said. My jaw literally dropped when I heard it. He even said that everything in our thesis paper was  literally the same from the last time and nothing had changed. We didn't do anything. He commented that our survey questionnaires were not even aligned with the SOP and that we should avoid using "Yes or No" questions. Like, WTF we're using an agreement type of survey questionnaire, we're not using a fckng Yes or No question. We all wondered where the hell he got those. 

We couldn't even defend ourselves or talk about our paper because he wouldn't let us talk. He's the only one that keeps on talking. He sounded like he was against us, like he hated our group. Then the other panelist commented with a positive comment that at least lessened our negative mood because of the previous panelist. The second panelist said that our PowerPoint presentation was good and all the information was there, but he gave us notes and corrections about our paper, and he then said that we should avoid using Yes or No, and we were like, "Why do you guys keep saying avoid using Yes or No when we're not even using that?"

We were so disappointed because we really did our best and we were confident that we could pull it off, but then all of a sudden it turns out like that. We began to wonder about their comments, so I checked the Google drive where we had submitted our paper and ppt, and there we saw that the paper that they had reviewed was our old research paper. It was the freakin' old paper! That's why they're saying that our paper was unfinished. We're so mad because of what happened. I don't know if they meant it, or if they just didn't notice the new paper that I submitted, or if he just hated us that badly. 

We approached our professor and informed him about it, saying that the old paper was the one they had reviewed and not the new one. So then our professor informed the panelists, and the first panelist was, "yeah, maybe" and then they ended the meeting. There are only two groups that got their thesis papers passed, and I can tell that we're all the same. We did the same thing to our papers as they did to theirs. So we were so mad, literally! Our professor informed us through messenger that they would just read it later, our new thesis paper. WTF?? 

It's so unfair! UNFAIR! It's like we're being played around. We didn't do anything to him, so why is he like this? I don't know him and I haven't met him, but why is he like this?? He sounded like he hated us. 

I invested everything in our thesis paper. I invested my time, money, and effort in it. It feels like our efforts were useless! Our sleepless nights and everything. We're being played here. It's not an accident or a misunderstanding that they reviewed the old one instead of the new one. Don't they know how to look at the date and time?? Are they blind?? 

Now, who's at fault here? 

It's literally his fault because he didn't double check the paper first before commenting! He makes us looks so dumb and lazy asf! He literally had no idea how much effort we did to our thesis paper. And just like that?? Back from the start?? WTF???

If you're still here, thanks for reading my rant. I really appreciate your presence here.