It should've been me instead of her

Have you ever been so regretful in your life for not letting an opportunity or not letting someone enter your life? You rejected someone but later regretted it, hoping it was you instead of someone else. I have been in that situation many times in my life. I wasted lots of opportunities just because I was so shy and didn't have the courage to do so. Then I picture myself thinking that I was way better than that one. 

Way back a couple of years ago, we were having our acquaintance the next day, and the faculty of our department was looking for an MC for the event. It needed to be male and female. Then this teacher of mine recommended me to be an MC because she somewhat liked my diction, then my other teachers agreed. I was then called to the office for my confirmation. When they told me that I would be the MC in front of a lot of people, I didn't hesitate to back out. I told them that I couldn't be the MC of the event because I have stage fright and might get knocked out if my legs started shaking. But my other teacher insisted and said that I was the one fit to be an MC along with my partner, who is also a friend of mine. I suggested my other friend because she's so confident, unlike me, who immediately hides in my shell whenever there are lots of people around.

Then, when the event started, and I heard them, the toxic side of me then activated. I then thought to myself that I was way better than she was, that I could do better than that. My toxic stupid a$$ immediately activated, hoping it was me instead of her. Pretty annoying, right?

I thought of this topic today because my friend told me about her love problem today; she rejected the guy and is now crying because she discovered he is already in a relationship. I was about to scold her, but then I realized that I was just like her before. But the difference between us is that I didn't cry when I found out my crush was already in a relationship. After all, why would I waste my tears on someone when there are so many fish in the ocean? LOL. My friend literally cried. She regretted why she rejected the guy at first, when the truth is that she also had feelings for him. She's playing hard to get, I guess. My friend is kinda beachy too. She said she's prettier than the girlfriend of the guy. She even said that he and she are more compatible with each other. But if you truly love that certain girl, then you're willing to wait for her until she's ready for a relationship. But you can't just give up easily when you're bored and then find someone else.

But as what they've said, "Nasa huli ang pagsisisi" regret will always be at the end of the line.

But if we knew that they're happy, then just let them be happy and accept the reality. That's what life is, we may lose an opportunity or we may lose someone but we're pretty sure that someone way better than the previous one will arrive in our life.

I told myself that I should sleep early tonight, but guess what? Here I am in the middle of the night writing this one to be published this day. I wasn't able to write this morning because I was busy with our prelim exam.

Welp, still, thank you lovelies for dropping by and reading this super late published post of mine.

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Arrigathankyougozaimuch :>

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