This time we will talk about adolescents without friends who often feel lonely and insecure and in many cases distrust others. Some say that this is sometimes a population at risk for certain mental disorders since feeling lonely can be the root of many problems and maladaptive reactions. On the other hand, friendships are considered necessary for their development. In adolescence, friends provide companionship and a critical context for learning social skills, such as cooperation and conflict resolution.
They also determine a person's social identity to a large extent. Close friends are assumed to satisfy additional social needs such as validation and intimacy in early adolescence. This results in a sense of security and reassurance, serving in many cases as a reference. However, not all young people are capable of creating bonds of friendship. As a result, they sometimes feel that they are "alone".
In that sense, feeling lonely is a fairly common feeling in adolescence, but in these cases it intensifies even more. And that results in social isolation, problems to trust. Often this situation is the result of a chain of aspects that sometimes begin in childhood. These include low self-esteem, feelings of insecurity, the experience of a traumatic situation involving other people, such as a situation of harassment or bullying, or lack of social skills.
In fact, as adults, we are often quick to tell them, "go make a friend." However, any perceived challenge can make a teen more likely to not communicate. For example, it's common for teens to see themselves as a bit off-putting. One of the ways you can help them is for them to share with their parents the sadness that feeling friendless can bring. If there is communication, we can know firsthand how they feel and it is easier to help them.
In the event that the adolescent has not commented anything, the first thing to do is to try to establish a conversation with them. This step is a challenge, especially if they demand privacy or we do not know how they will react. Therefore, the approach must be based on flexibility and understanding. On the other hand, if he shows interest in expanding his circle of friends, it is good news, since it is likely that he can find his place. The teenage years are difficult enough without friends.
Another reason it's hard to have friends is that it takes work to maintain friendships over time. Meeting people can already be a complicated matter for some people. But acquaintances are one thing, having friends is another. People who feel that they don't have many friends should consider the possible reasons for this. To begin with, it is important to know that the rules of the game change over the years.
Finally, when we are teenagers we follow behavioral guidelines dictated by the environment around us, doing what we think we should do. But as time goes by we understand things differently and many situations that we used to accept as valid cease to be. There are certain types of situations and attitudes that make it very difficult to make friends and maintain friendships; above all, the character and way of being of each one. Friendship is a beautiful word and a better feeling. It is that invisible bond that unites us to others. A bond of affection that is born with people who cross our path and thus become indispensable beings in our lives.
In your adolescence did you make many or few friends?
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Disclaimer: I would like to let you know that English is not my mother tongue, I may even make some mistakes in the elaboration of sentences in my posts. Feel free to correct me attentively. It will help me in my learning process.
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When I was a teenager I had one best friend with whom I spent the most time. I had other friends too, but I had a superficial relationship with them. And now I don't have many friends either. I actually have but I am not that close to them.