A year with ArtPark and digital arts!
Hello hello! I’m back and in light of the recent ArtPark activity on noise.cash, I kind of just wanted to expand on the idea. So it has been one year since I went fully digital with my arts. Although I still do traditional here and there, I do think I gave digital arts so much of my focus since I got my drawing tablet.
I started out as a traditional artist and I used to write about my art progression here on read.cash. It was fun since I could get something out of my hobbies. My hobbies weren’t just hobbies anymore. They were slowly becoming a daily activity and I could see my passion for it returning. I also noticed my old drawing style coming back. If not, it was improving little by little. I was also getting my old drawing speed back. From 3 hours of drawing time, it was back to 2 hours at most then my sketching and drafting time went from 30 minutes to 15 then 10 minutes. I still can’t do 5 minutes of sketching. I never did reach that level but I’m happy with my 10 minute sketching time since I know not everyone can do that.
Anyways, Based on my gallery, I joined ArtPark in March of 2021. I think I found them in February? But I didn’t join right away because I wasn’t all that confident in DTIS (Do this In Your Style) because they mostly used anime characters (I honestly cannot draw anime characters for some reason) and characters I don’t know XD
I mean, I tried, but since I wasn’t really that adept at drawing characters, I kind of kept skipping days XD Some @ArtPark weeks I skipped were mostly because I was extremely busy ;;-;;
Also, I was trying a few things on my own. Primarily, I was trying to adapt to the digital brushes and put my traditional art style in a digital setting. Like my friends recognize my drawing style and it kind of amuses me, but when I went digital, I remember they would make fun of it for a while because “Maybe digital ain’t for you” because it felt like my art skills kind of downgraded. I blame that on having the wrong brush settings at that time and my lack of knowledge of the software I was using.
Luckily I’ve pretty much mastered my software now and I’m kind of expanding the software I use since paint tool SAI 2 is good for beginners, line arts and for the base of your drawing, but eventually I do want to try out effects that only certain software has. I was trying out medibang a while back but it’s still kind of hard for me to adjust to. I love the symmetry features it has though since it offers a vanishing point and guidelines too. But right now, I think I’ll be practicing perspectives on SAI first before going on more object study for that.
Anyways… I think these are the only art park entries I have that were drawn traditionally?
Then the rest was digital XD
You can definitely see the improvement, but for my art goal this 2022, I want to polish up my style more and maybe expand to different kinds of styles… or at least, what my art style will allow? Because I tried cartooning and cell blocking (anime style shading) and I really struggled with that. I also kind of struggle with line art because it comes out so rough despite the fact that you can edit it on SAI. Maybe I’ll try art with line art too for my personal satisfaction.
Also more art challenges in the future! Right now I’m on a 60 day watercolor practice challenge and I’m on day 16. After this, I was planning to do the 100 heads challenge too where you have to draw 100 heads. I’m still not sure what medium I’ll use for that but I’ll find out when I get there.
Boring writer
This is semi-fiction since I am writing and I have written countless characters already, but I have no interest in writing about my life much 😅
Okay, this came out pretty boring while I was proofreading it.
This is the effect of my head being in my sketchpad and with the lack of caffeine for… almost 2 weeks! Caffeine fuels my imagination OnO
[WP] "If I were to write a book about my life, would anyone read it? If I were the reader, I'd pretty much say no..." As a famous writer, you've written countless lives, and read numerous of them, yet the one life you don't ever want to read is your own.
At 60 years old, life had very little excitement to offer me. I glanced at the bookshelf lined with some of my best sellers and ones that have made my name worth remembering. These works of fiction… How could such creations come from me? I asked myself countless times, and I’ve been asked the same question with every interview
“How did you create such masterpieces?”
The answer, I have no idea. Perhaps handpicking words, perhaps meticulously thinking that I’m the character? It helps to think in such a way.
“If you were to write a book about your life, do you think anyone would read it?” I laughed internally at that during my last interview. It was a humorous question and I bluntly answered no. My life lacked the excitement most authors experienced. I did not struggle with my writing, nor did I come from rags to riches background. No severe childhood trauma nor any vices and addictions that became evident in adulthood. Nothing except the caffeine dependence that I seemed to have acquired through the years. But who was ever safe from it? There was no romance or heartbreaks either. No love life, no company left. I was just a lonely old man who had nothing left. I was simply writing about all the chaos and wars wreaking havoc in my head as the years progressed. Although, I do think I made good use of the loneliness I’ve felt ever so often.
I was simply writing for my own amusement and it amused me that other people shared the amusement I had in my works. Recognition from the people turned to admiration and before I knew it, my small blog turned into full-blown novels that spread like wildfire.
There was no publishing company rejecting me in any way. I simply wrote and wrote and poured my world onto paper until some publishers discovered my blogs. It was a fascinating experience, yes, and perhaps the highlight of my life and career yet it was just that. After a few years in the limelight… I did consider writing my autobiography. I still attempt to do so every now and then. And now, as I take a look at everything I’ve written, and it would probably never see the light of day. Judging my own life from a reader’s perspective. I would definitely just stick to my novels. Still, I safely tuck everything I’ve written so far back into the drawer of my working desk. Maybe one day, when I’m long gone, some people will find something in the way I’ve lived my life.
Not my best piece… But I am in pain from the booster shot I had this afternoon ;;n;;
Also, I was drafting some science articles since I’m trying to include my industry knowledge into my articles again XD It feels like such a waste to not put this knowledge to good use even if it scares people. I call it awareness and appreciation of the micro level and not scaring people UwU
And another also! My life isn’t so boring UmU I’ve caused a few explosions in the lab to make my laboratory life exciting enough.
The great reset!
And so, we're back to December 31 again. This year has been such a long one for me with so many things happening. Depressing was the best way to put it in the first half of the year because I swear, I struggled so much with my mental health then. And I'm pretty sure it continued until August? Or so? It only got better around September for me. Like... After I passed my board requirements and after I actually passed the board exams, it's been pretty peaceful after and it gave me a lot of time to see different perspectives, talk to more people and generally just enjoy the freedom window I was given before I signed my contract for work 😅
I'm not writing to dwell on my horrible mental health though. Today, I'm here with new goals and a newfound resolve to actually push through with it. This will be a long-ass personal reflection...-ish but if you read through it til the end. I greatly appreciate it UwU
First on my list is to stay active here, actually 😅 I think people have noticed that when I get busy, I tend to just go missing altogether. I don't really like it because my notifs keep piling up and I feel bad that I can't thoroughly enjoy what people write. Plus the amount of articles I publish has greatly declined ;;-;; and I feel bad about it. I'm aiming for 2-4 publications per week ;;-;; since it's proven that I can't write every day no matter how hard I try because I value my writing quality so much.
Second, I aim to expand my reaches and my portfolio more. So far, I'm deeply invested in BCH and SmartBCH and this year has been a great year for BCH! But it wouldn't hurt to expand to hive and steemit. It's pretty late, yes. And I might need assistance on those platforms too but I'll do my best to keep up with things once I've adjusted with my work schedule.
Third. The need to change my lifestyle and eating habits. I want to eat healthier since I'm really not a fan of eating out or getting take out. Unless they're made to order food, I really can't appreciate it sometimes. Right now I'm investing in my mini herb garden which I hope will reduce my grocery expenses in the long run (herbs and spices are so expensive here, okay) also I would prefer home grown and home processed food stuff UwU what's the point of me being a chemist if I can't use my knowledge for better food alternatives.
That's my herb garden now OwO it's not much yet but I'm working on it! I'm slowly adding plants to it and I'm installing a wire wall to make a vertical garden.
These are my most recent additions to my garden. After the new year, I'll be setting up my wire wall then I'll be getting hanging pots. Also, on a side note, gardening is so calming and so satisfying. So I don't think I'll mind spending this much on my happiness in the future too.
Fourth goal, to make more art! Yes, I think this is a given but goal 3 and 4 are there to cultivate my soul, self expression and my overall happiness UwU
Since my grandfather already blessed me with a supply of paintbrushes, I aim to buy more paint for my traditional art. Maybe gauche paint because I love the blending capabilities it has and how fast it reactivates! For my digital art... I have no idea but probably a better drawing tablet in the future 😅 So if anyone wouldn't mind getting one... 👉👈😅😅😅
Okay I'm semi-kidding on that one but pretty paint though OwO
Fifth goal is to save up! Since I'll be having a regular job starting on January 10, I'm positive that I can finally start saving regularly! And I'm hoping I won't need to touch my crypto assets anymore so maybe I can get my 1 bch? I'm not sure how much my bch is now in the smart bch because I stopped monitoring but I'm still sure that it hasn't reached 1 bch yet 😅😅😅
Goal six. More travels! This wasn't supposed to be on my list because I'm not even that familiar with my work schedule yet but my best friend told me that it would be nice if we can travel somewhere out of town monthly. I wasn't opposed to the idea since in a few years, we might not even be in the country anymore so we should make the most out of it. Backpacking and group tours are becoming a thing again so traveling would be cheap again! So yes to more mountains to climb, to more waterfalls, beaches and lakes to swim in and yes to meeting new people along the way!
These are all of the goals I have on my list for now! I never want to pressure myself so I'll always go with vague ideas but as for setting goals, go with things that will give you long-term satisfaction! This is me with a somewhat optimistic outlook for the year! May 2022 be a good year for everyone here!
The fictional hanahaki disease
No storytelling for today, but I found something rather interesting among my commission requests OwO As a lover of lore and anything aesthetic, I just couldn’t stop myself from dwelling on this idea because it’s the most unusual fictional disease I’ve ever encountered. Also one of the most poetic.
I usually do receive weird commissions when I do, but this one was one of the prettiest kinds of aesthetics I’ve encountered as a commission artist. This one has based on a fictional disease called hanahaki disease, which literally translates to throwing up flower petals (Hana = flower, haki/hakimitsu = throwing up).
This disease was first described in the Japanese manga, hanahaki otome, or the girl who spits out flowers (published in 2009) by Naoko Matsuda sensei. Sadly, there are no available scanlations anywhere (I’ve tried looking;;-;;) so I guess I’ll have to ask for someone in Japan to find this for me one day XD. This manga series has 3 volumes and has 15 chapters all-in-all. The manga is in an old japan setting and covers the romantic genre. In the story, the hanahaki disease was described to be a disease one-sided lovers experience so yes, platonic/friendly love is safe from this disease.
It was described in the literature how the protagonist started feeling immense pain. From there on, the other symptoms followed: roots growing from the heart and lungs. None of the literature searches I did indicated how to stop the spread (like prolonging or keeping the disease at bay. I don’t think the manga even indicated that either. No prevention was also stated, but I don’t think crushes can be stopped anyways). What I did find though was when it stops spreading.
To stop or “cure this disease, you would need to get an operation to have the roots removed, but along with the removal of the roots, your love for that person will also be removed. It’s kind of sad because you won’t be able to love that person again.
Another way to stop get rid of this disease was if the person they loved would love them back in a romantic sense. I honestly wouldn’t mind the later option XD I don’t like getting attached to people that way, I swear, crushes and one-sided love feels like a waste of time.
If you chose to just leave the disease untreated… well… it’ll be a bitter end for you. You’ll just end up coughing up flower petals and blood until you either die from blood loss or from suffocation (the roots and flowers will block your airways). It’s a kind of beautiful and bitter-sweet death that looks way too aesthetic in my perspective as an artist (as gruesome as the disease symptoms sound).
Whether this kind of disease had earlier adaptions or versions though, it’s unsure. I don’t think there is since I also can’t find anything but other east Asian countries have adopted this kind of fantasy idea. Like the Korean webtoon “Spring in the heart” by webtoon artist Bboong. Sadly, this webtoon was taken down because there copyright of the idea is strong XD.
It didn’t stop artists and poets from creating wonderful art from this trope though. That includes me who’s currently still working on my pretty hanahaki boy. Maybe next, I’ll make a boy’s love story about this genre because a number of literature I’ve been seeing that tackles this trope is mostly same-sex romances. It makes a lot of sense because if it came out in 2009 where people were so close-minded to the idea of same-sex romances, then I can imagine this as one of the unique genres to go about.
This is all from me. I still have to finish this piece and add in bloody vines and flowers everywhere XD
Unexpected travels + rushing to Noche Buena
I may have mentioned before that I was going on a trip with my best friend and her boyfriend’s family. She informed me on the 19th? 20th? Then without much mental preparation, she told me that we’d be driving to the destination on the 23rd. I spent a lot of time bugging my mom about the stuff to bring on swimming trips because I was told that it was gonna be a swimming trip but boy was I wrong XD turns out, it was also a hiking trip and I was not ready to hike, nor did I have any experience on actual mountain climbing, but I’ll go about the trip per stop.
On the 23rd, I left the house at 8 pm because we agreed to meet up at their house at 9 pm. I actually got there early and I was dragged along to their last-minute food shopping. It wasn’t so bad because I got to visit an old mall I haven’t seen in a while.
By 11 pm, we began our drive to Dingalan, Aurora. That was a 4-hour drive (much faster cuz we left at night) The boyfriend was driving for the entire trip there and we felt bad for him so we just stayed up with him to keep him company and to talk his ear off because I have no idea what he finds amusing with me and my best friend’s conversations but it amuses him too much.
At 3 am, we got to our sleeping cottage his family rented. At 5:30 am, the tour guide they hired came into the cabin and woke us all up. It was pretty much a headache when you barely got any sleep but the good food at the cafeteria made up for it UwU
They had these amazing lucban sausages and they were so good!!!!!
By 6 am, we drove off to the feeder’s port where a boat was waiting for us. Of course, we had about… 20 minutes to look around and enjoy the views. I think Albert (the boyfriend) Made good use of his camera since he is a photographer. I’ve yet to see our photos though. He said he was gonna edit stuff first.
So we traveled to Dingalan Island for 30 minutes and I really enjoyed the views there. So much, sea, sun, and wind! The most outside exposure I got since the pandemic started and it was nice.
The first destination was supposed to be this cave of wonders but I think the entrance wasn’t big enough so we ended up going to the rock formations instead and we had a mini rock climbing practice there because we seriously had to climb the jagged rocks to get up to the first lighthouse. As to why we couldn’t take the trails, I have no idea XD
(I was still climbing when they were taking pictures XD I'm a slow climber, yes)
The next destination was a 30-minute hike up a mountain. It was mostly for sightseeing and I was on a 50-50 in deciding whether the hike was worth it or not. I mean, the view was great but the 30-minute hike made me feel like giving up halfway through. I guess this is what they call the mountain climber’s satisfaction when we reach the peak?
Anyways, when we climbed back down, we were greeted with food!!!!!! It was my first time to experience a boodle fight despite being a native to the country.
After the small feast, we were given an hour and a half to swim in the beach. It was a beautiful beach with white sand and really clear water ;;w;; The water wasn’t too salty too compared to most beaches I’ve been to so it was a really enjoyable swim for me. At that point, I stopped keeping track of time and we just followed the tour guide XD
The last destination was actually this waterfall called tanawan falls. It was a 40 minute hike uphill and at the summit, you get greeted with this amazing waterfall. We were actually dared to do cliff diving and being me who likes dares, I jumped 3 times XD
That was basically everything we did for the whole day but it was all laughs and bullying each other. I’m pretty surprised I can get along with strangers now because I used to struggle with that.
We left the falls at around 5 pm because everyone still had christmas eve/Noche Buena plans and that included me XD
We drove so fast yet we still got back to our city at 11 pm, almost midnight.
I was pretty amused that I came home to tipsy sisters and cousins and very needy dogs.
I finally have work! + art update
Okay, I finally got to write here again! The recent updates gave me trouble writing because all I got was a white screen and no matter how many times I refreshed, the writing space wouldn’t appear but now I am back! And with a lot of things to say OwO
First and foremost, I finally have a job! I can finally put my laboratory skills to good use. I honestly gave up on the whole idea of job hunting for this year because I was pretty sure companies were just trying to avoid recomputing the bonuses of new hires and also to avoid giving bonuses altogether. That’s why I said I would resume the hunt in January. What was surprising was when I received a call from this company I applied for last November. They asked me to have a final interview with the laboratory head. And me, someone who currently only had arts to distract me, said yes to the interview.
I was pretty sure they wouldn’t consider me, but when I got a call some time this week, I was extremely pleased to hear that they will be holding a virtual meeting to discuss my employment and contract.
The following day, I signed my contract and had a virtual lab tour! Ahh, the lab looked so pristine and clean. The analysts were already on Christmas break so there wasn’t anybody in the lab, but I already fell in love with the lab!
It’s also a plus that the company follows international standards and not local standards so even if they send me abroad, I will survive! And speaking of abroad, the company provides its employees the opportunity to go to their labs overseas and work there. It’s a really good deal so I’m just hoping I last long enough in this company to be offered to go abroad.
On a different note, I’ve gone back to traditional art recently! I met someone on noise and it turns out she owns an online shop for art materials! So far, she’s mostly selling sketch pads/watercolor pads, paint, and a few watercolor materials. I tried getting the smallest booklet and I decided to fill every page with a watercolor painting. I have seen on social media how some artists decided to draw something every day. It’s just that I decided to do this with watercolors.
I was supposed to do anatomy study through these, but then decided against it when I noticed how much I lacked skin colors. So I thought I’d go for sceneries and objects first.
I also lacked subjects I wanted to draw so I kind of relied on a prompt generator to help me decide what to draw for the next 62 days XD
Day 1: Dock and Day 2: Crystal Ball
Day 3: Seaside at night and Day 4: House on the side of a cliff
Day 5: Honey wand and Day 6: Wizard staff
Right now, I'm working on 2 paintings because I will be going on a trip later and I don't think I'll be given a chance to draw
Of course, I still had a few digital projects. I can’t disclose some But I can at least show a few of them.
Here is my slowvember entry for artpark OwO in slowvember, we draw things that are cozy and comforting to us. Weirdly for me, it's very comforting to get food I like. I also tried a different art style her XD and I swear, the urge to not blend completely killed me, but it came out pretty good and pretty accurate to how I look like
Then this is my anthromorphed Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer 😅😅😅 MY sister said I made it too divine looking and while doing this, I wasn't so sure how I wanted it to come out... but yeah, it looks divine ;;w;;
The next time you hear from me will probably be after Christmas so advance Merry Christmas and Happy holidays to you guys!
somewhat normalizing
Hello ^w^ I'm back after a while. I swear, I'm not disappearing on purpose, I've just been going out for errands way too much. The Christmas season is fast approaching and I've been running more errands than I usually do.
Recently, it feels like things are slowly going back to the pre-pandemic area because I'm seeing so many kids around. In the market, in parks, in malls, and in public transportation. It's a bit concerning but I guess it's one of the steps to return to the former normal where kids got to get around with their parents. I'm still not in favor of it but it's what people want. And from just watching the kids going out, I see 2 visible outcomes. It's either they don't want to go back inside, or they just want to go back inside as soon as possible. Sadly, my little sister belongs to the latter group XD
Can't blame her though, she spent her entire high school life on an online set up so now she's more anti-social than I expected. I'm concerned when she starts the face-to-face classes because she might not manage.
Despite that, I convinced her to go to an anime convention with me ^w^ It was just a small-scale one. Something to test the waters before I start taking her to the big conventions that will start opening up next year.
So far, she can't handle the outside world for long. But she had fun UwU that was for sure.
So this was on the bus to the train station. The people on the bus made her hide for a while and she stayed like that til we reached the train station. It's her comfort blamket/ convention costume. It's the blanket of an anime character called Umaru-chan and she uses it all the time, the convention was no exception.
On the train... she hasn't experienced buying train tickets and getting on the main trains yet so just buying tickets really tired her out 😅 so I think I might get her the stored value card next time I take her anywhere so she doesn't end up like this again. I'm pretty sure that if it wasn't an anime convention, I wouldn't even succeed in getting her out of the house.
She was pretty preppy at the actual venue though. She couldn't stop looking at the cosplayers and at the merchandise that was up on display (mostly bootleg displays) I was planning to take her to the anime merch mall but... maybe when she gets more used to people and outside. As of now, I can see that human interaction either makes her tired or cranky.
Sadly, we didn't stick around for long since the number of people was really stressing her out. She enjoyed the event but I guess she was mentally shocked with the change of environment where she only had to handle 4 people and 2 dogs, then suddenly, the people around her went to 100+ (the number of convention-goers I estimated when we were there. So after 2 hours, I took her to the food places near there. So yeah, 2 hours of convention time then almost 3 hours of staying in this almost empty cafe so she could recharge for a bit.
The ramen was a take out from another store XD But yeah, 3 hours here while we waited for rush hour to end and for the people density to lower so it doesn't tire her out more. Sad to say, she doesn't hold back when I tell her to "Order anything she likes" So my wallet pretty much cried that day but hey, she came home happy and she knocked out as soon as she saw her bed XD
After this little social experiment on my sister and the limits of her introvert tendencies... I think I need to take her out more. Maybe on a once-a-month basis so she eases up to people again because she definitely needs to learn how to ease back into this new normal.
This is all from me for a now. The next time I return, let's see if I make a more... contentful article. For now, I'm just writing down my observations with my sister and with going outside because she's been cooped up indoors since the pandemic started so I was pretty curious how she'd handle outside now.
Lady Frost
“We’re in the negatives again! And on that note, make sure to prepare your thickest coats and some firewood because the local weather center has announced that there will be colder days ahead…”
As the radio broadcaster fell into blabber of technicalities, Harold got up from his cozy sat and turned the volume down.
“It’s gonna be cold for a while? She must be in a bad mood” He muttered to himself as he paced around his small cabin, hoping to find his thick coat and his walking cane. “It should be about time I paid her a visit,” He said whilst gazing out the frosted window.
Once done dressing up, he looked out the window once more before opening the back door of his house. The wind had a bite to it that could send anybody running back to inside for warmth. But no, there was no better time than now to go meet her.
Slowly, he made his way deep into the forest that was not so far from his home. It was fortunate that the trees somehow acted as windbreakers, else, he would be taking this trip much longer than he would have hoped for.
In his youth, this would have taken him merely minutes had he rushed to the center of the forest, but being 64, his knees were growing weak. The biting cold was making it harder for him to move and much sooner, he would have to stop altogether. But while he can, he will.
While lost in thought, the sight of a blue-skinned woman shook him back to his reality. “There you are frost”
The woman merely stole a glance before turning on her heel to head deeper into the forest.
“Where are you going? Are you mad at me? ” Harold asked despite the exhaustion and dryness in his voice.
“You’re late,” She said quite sternly.
Her tone was befitting of her character. It always has and probably always will “I’m not as youthful as I once was” Harold motioned to himself as she turned to steal another glance at him.
“I’m aware. Yet it wouldn’t hurt to visit more often” She said as she settled in a pile of rocks that seemed fitting to be sat on. “It’s been lonelier with each passing year” She motioned for him to sit beside her. And without question, he gladly did.
“It has been for me too, Frost” He breathed out a hum and settled beside her. “It wouldn’t hurt if you came to visit me for once” He traced as he pulled out a small box from his coat pocket. “Like you used to before…”
The downcast gazes didn’t escape her, yet she knew there wasn’t anything she could do to comfort him. “Won’t the people fear me?” Curiously, she took the box from his hand. For a moment, she gazed at it and gave it a shake, hoping to get an idea of what was inside.
“Just open it,” He said with impatience and a slight hint of amusement.
With a bit of a huff, she pulled off the ribbon on the box, then slipped open the box lid. “It’s a ring?” She said as she raised it to what little light seeped into the forest “Why are you giving me a ring?” She glanced at him yet he was already off his seat and was kneeling in front of her.
“If you would allow me?” He asked for the ring back so he could slip it onto her ring finger “I wanted to do this on the day you became like this.”
“But you stepped on the wrong side of the lake,” her tone was heavy with sadness. “You seem better as a human though” The corner of her lips twitched up, hoping she could force a smile.
“I know… but if you would allow me to. Let me join you in this curse of yours as I should have all those years ago”
“I don’t want to be lonely anymore, but I also don’t want you to have this life I have now. It was lovely to watch you live as you promised me when I saved you from the lake and it would be lovelier to have seen you with a family we never had” Gently, she caressed his cheek and he couldn’t help but press her hand more against his skin. The coldness pricked and numbed his skin, yet it was still the hand of the woman he loved all these years.
“I won’t be taking no for an answer this time, frost” He flashed her one of the brightest smiles he could muster before he stood up and offered his hand.
Together, they walked deep into the forest and stopped at the edge of the lake that had turned frost into what she was now.
“This time… I promise that we’ll be together”
He walked further ahead alone while frost watch. With one final look at her, he pierced his walking cane into the frozen layer and allowed the ice to shatter. In a matter of minutes, he was already sinking deep into the icy cold water.
Another few minutes passed and there was stillness in the lake once again. At first, Frost thought it was a failed attempt. But when a feathery touch was tapping on her shoulder, she knew that he wouldn’t be alone for the succeeding winter to come.
Another series of shameless self promotion of my juungle account again 😅
But we have to do what is needed to be done. As usual, she's just right there in my collection :") and it would be cool if you could check it out
https://www.juungle.net/#/collection/ca495aa47f95e6f2c2a661f49ec17eac9534ebe792b66a93d93adcc0149594c4
My last winter
Still fiction, but I found this playlist that was on a dark academia theme, and I kind of got ideas from it. Still kind of sad, but not everything about December is happy. Or maybe I’m just too enthralled by this playlist.
Also, I'm waiting for the day I get my research motivation back because I have a list of things I want to discuss yet I can't find the motivation to get started on them.
The winter air seemed chillier these days than ever. It was something I thought to myself as I watched the delicate flakes kiss the earth’s surface. Had it not been for the recent events, I would have joined them in their dance. I would have twirled and glided as if I were one with these flakes yet I couldn’t bring myself to. Not anymore.
I stare down at the sketch pad on my lap. Still empty and partially ruined from the melting snow that had made the ink bleed into the pages. Yes, the black, blue, and red seemed to have melded together in such a way that even I couldn’t decipher it anymore. Much like my thoughts that seemed to be filled with the very colors on this pad.
I browsed through the ruined papers once more, like I’ve done so with much enthusiasm weeks ago. Yet this time, each turn of the page only leaves me with bitterness.
On each page, I could still faintly make out your image. The graphite I used for the initial sketches had still not faded. Such as my last memory of you before you left. You were still smiling as I saw you out of the house. Dressed sharply in your business suit and your slightly crooked tie that I always had to fix.
Yes, I should have stopped you from taking that overseas business trip. I should have checked when I heard that faint whisper in my ear. I should have recognized whose voice that was right from the start instead of spending the night listening to the directions it gave my hands and body. I should not have put my sketch pad right beside our bed, nor the bottles of ink next to it, that night.
The whispers of late nights were something I always had to live with yet this last one felt the most chilling… yet, so tender at the same time. The indescribable feeling of something being so foreign, yet so familiar at the same time. That was what that night was to me. And that was what the image came out to be once I had taken a step back to see what my hands had created.
Denial immediately took over until I heard the phone ring.
“Hello, is this Mrs. X? I regret to inform you that the train your husband was in got derailed and crashed.”
The train crashed? That was the only thing that registered in my head.
I waited for days. Hoping for his return. And he did. As an urn and as ashes that now sit in his favorite spot in the living room.
While I sit outside, at the very park we met. And I still recall the first few conversations we had when you found out I was an artist.
“I know you’re an artist because your works inspire me. They make it so hard for me to take my eyes off of the pieces you make.” It was what you said before asking if you could take a seat beside me.
And I jokingly answered back “Then maybe you’re a piece of art? Because I find it so hard to take my eyes off of you.”
Yet now I sit alone, reliving the memories while waiting for the frost to take me, like how I wanted it to before you came into my world.
Caged
“Help…. Me…”
The voice echoes through the dormitory halls once more. The cold, hollow voice reverberated through the silence of the night. It was always a question of whether it was only Scarlett, who could hear this voice. Every night, the teen would toss and turn in her bed, hoping to get as much sleep as she could get, yet each attempt would always lead to another sleepless night.
This night was no exemption. It seemed as though each night became worse. The voice grew more desperate. And so was Scarlett. She was growing exceedingly curious with the origin of the voice.
One night, after finally giving in to her thoughts, she snuck out of her dorm room. With silenced steps, she listened intently to the voice.
“Help me... Please… I’m burning,”
Burning? That was new to the words she often heard. The voice led to the end of the hall, yet there was nothing there besides a wall and right next to it, stairs leading to the storage room. Was there a fire in the storage room? With that realization, she hurried upstairs.
Nothing, nothing greeted her, but silence.
“Hello? Is anyone up here? ” Scarlett said in hushed tones as she looked around the dark room. Had it not been to the moon that illuminated some parts of the room, everything would have been pitch black, so she was thankful for what little light she could get at least.
“Help…” The voice was near the stairs, but when she turned to the surrounding area, there was nothing but the same concrete wall that greeted her a floor below.
“I’m in here… Please help me,” Upon further inspection, she was sure that it was just a wall, but when she tried knocking on the wall, it didn’t make the sound a concrete wall should make. That wall sounded hollow. Again, she knocked to make sure. Yes, hollow.
“I’ll come back for this tomorrow” Scarlett muttered to herself before turning back to the stairs. Just as she was about to make her way down, she heard a knock on the wall she was just examining. First, it was just one. One knock that made her linger. The next thing she knew, it was one knock after the other. They came faster and harder as if the person behind the wall was frantically trying to escape.
“Stop it- Stop it, please!” Scarlett pleaded as she covered her ears, yet nothing seemed to stop the knocks.
“Let me out, I’m burning” It was that voice again. The owner of the voice was burning behind a wall? Would breaking the wall make this voice go away, she thought to herself as she scanned the room frantically to find anything that could break the wall. Anything to stop the voice.
A hammer. That’s it! She spared no time in picking the tool up from the box. As soon as the pleads turned to wails and cries, she knew that if she doesn’t end this now, she will never find peace. Bang. One hit after the next, she frantically banged the hammer against the wall until pieces of the wall started to crumble and fall from its place. It’s working.
When she finally got through the cement, what greeted her was a rusted gate that seemed to be like those old elevators.
“This is the thing driving me crazy?” She muttered to herself as she dropped the hammer. “All this for a stupid elevator? What’s with this elevator?” Her tone was that of frustration. It didn’t make sense to her and she thought that it would be better to just leave it be for tomorrow. That was what she thought of doing, but when the elevator lights came to life, and a figure appeared before her, she stood affixed to her spot.
“Thank you for freeing me… as a reward…” The pale figure, then lifted her head to reveal her burnt face “I’ll let you burn in hell with me!” A maniacal laugh echoed through the room.
“Burn? What-” Before Scarlett could even make a run for it, a hand dragged her by the collar and she was dragged into the elevator. The gates instantly slammed shut and the elevator fell. That night, everyone in the dorm heard the most chilling scream, they ever heard in their life.
Okay, this was kind of just a promotion prompt again because I thought it was needed for this piece. Anyways, feel free to check that piece on my juungle account. Thank you for reading!
**https://www.juungle.net/share/ff4fd5d8a72652f3cd293ebbae30ade91845bd0fdf231fb8fd2bfb85fb2b6bac**
Things to settle: I'm a demon
Chapter 1 https://read.cash/@Hanzell/things-to-settle-9d494764
**[WP] One day the person you're dating reveals to you that they're actually a demon from hell who was hired by someone you wronged in a past life. They were supposed to kill you but fell in love with you instead, and now another demon is coming to kill both of you.**
**[WP] See, the thing most people don't realize about coffee is that the way it freshens up a room and neutralizes odors by binding with any sulfur in the air. That's why coffee shops are the perfect place for demons to unobtrusively meet & mingle with humans... And why there's one on every corner now.**
January 28, 20XX
It has been two weeks since I and this demon started our little game of cat and mouse. But right now… I’m not sure who’s the cat and who’s the mouse. All I know is that this demon cleans up his trail pretty thoroughly that it’s terrifying. I can sense nothing and I can trace nothing. I’m starting to think that maybe that encounter at the cafe was something like a greeting of sorts. The kind of greeting that felt like a hard slap of reality. That I was hired to kill Jason and if I couldn’t do it, Lilith will find someone else who will. But to go through such lengths, what could Jason’s soul had done to the great mistress.
That’s something else to worry about. I think it’s slowly becoming obvious to him that I am not human. I can’t tell whether fatigue is finally taking a toll on my skills or if his exposure to my kind is making him more oblivious to a demon’s shapeshifting. Whatever it is…. I should assure his safety first before I leave him behind.
I was startled when my phone rang. As expected, it was Jason and he’s coming over. This is fine, he’s safer when he’s under my watch so I hurriedly agreed and cleaned up the apartment I’m using. It’s only been a week since he’s last visited but my paranoia really made me forget that I need to maintain the material things too. With a snap of my fingers, My shadows came out from the dark corners an with just a look, they understood that things in the apartment needed to be organized in a matter of minutes. And so they did. Shadows flew around, dragging dust off the floor, rearranging the mess I’ve created while also fixing up the furniture and anything else that seemed out of place. I was pretty sure a few minutes would be enough but when I heard the splash of liquid, my attention was immediately drawn to the door where a dumbfounded Jason stood by the doorway.
Shit. I forgot he had an extra key.
“W-What are those things?!?” Shocked was an understatement. He looked like he was ready to faint.
The spilled coffee on my carpet didn’t really matter at that moment. I gestured a hand and a shadow pushed him forward before shutting the door.
“Jason, I need you to calm down first” I was trying to reach for his hand to lead him to the sofa but when he swatted my hand away… It saddened me but he needed to calm down.
“And what the hell are you??? Are you like them too?” His gaze kept going back to the door that was now blocked by one of my shadow creatures. I know he wanted to find an escape route because I noticed that he looked out the window but since the apartment is too high, he might have reconsidered it.
“I own them.”I said bluntly as I summoned a few of them back into my shadows. I didn’t summon back the ones guarding the door and windows out of fear for any violent reactions he might have “Okay, Jason… I might not have been completely honest with you”
“No shit-” He snapped and with that tone, I can tell that he’s close to going into a fit “All this time, the girl I’m dating was something else. So what the hell are you?!?”
“A demon, Jason. I’m a demon”
I'm sorry for going MIA again for a while ;;-;; I was on a drawing spree and I really wanted to make the most of it while I was in a creative mood. Anyways, a few finished works was attained while I was away
This was among the few things I finished and you can check that out on juungle here: https://www.juungle.net/share/ff4fd5d8a72652f3cd293ebbae30ade91845bd0fdf231fb8fd2bfb85fb2b6bac
I might make a story for her one of these days too. When I find a good prompt for her or when I think of a better concept for her besides horror XD
There's also professor Heimerdinger. An Arcane character and also a game character that I really like. It's a huge contrast from my usual art style, but hey, it's still me. I'm pretty shocked that I could draw something this cute though- the art style doesn't feel like I drew it at all. But yeah, you can check that one here:
https://www.juungle.net/share/fca481e70cfeac5952c71a813fa9877ebc801e9258c7a6373a30d58e184cadee
This is me signing off for until I have the writing motivation again XD
Things to settle
**[WP] One day the person you're dating reveals to you that they're actually a demon from hell who was hired by someone you wronged in a past life. They were supposed to kill you but fell in love with you instead, and now another demon is coming to kill both of you.**
**[WP] See, the thing most people don't realize about coffee is that the way it freshens up a room and neutralizes odors by binding with any sulfur in the air. That's why coffee shops are the perfect place for demons to unobtrusively meet & mingle with humans... And why there's one on every corner now.**
I know I’ve erred in this mission of mine. I’ve been finding ways to make it look like I’ve died in a tragic accident for months now. Unfortunately, it’s too late and my employer has found someone else to finish the job off, and that includes finishing me off as well. I let out a deep sigh as I survey the area again. The cafe I and my beloved frequented has a new demon regular and the way it eyes me like its targets… I hope my suspicions are false.
“What are you looking at, Mara? Mara!”
I was snapped out of my train of thoughts when I felt a tapping on the back of my hand and the voice of Jason, the person this new demon is eyeing. Also, my current lover.
“Nothing, I just think this dude is eyeing you funny” I play it off as a joke but I don’t think he believes me
“Are you into him? You’ve been staring at him for a while now” Jealousy was heavy in his tone as he pointed at the man on the far corner of the cafe.
I grew a little flustered as I frantically shook my head “What are you talking about- why would I be into someone else when I already have the perfect fit for me” I reached out and poked his lips that were now curled to pout
“Just making sure,” He said with a huff, and I would have teased him more, but that would be bad when we’re in public so I settled to just mouthing the words “I love you” and with just that gesture, his face instantly lit up.
I still have my suspicions about this man, but that will have to wait until Jason’s walked me to the apartment I reside in here on earth land.
That very night, I made a full search of the city. I passed through every alley, every street, and every building within the city. By 3 am, I had to use all my energy reserves. I was growing more and more desperate with my search. No information could be gathered, even from the demons that have settled on earth land. I came to the point that I had to summon my shadow creatures in order to find this new demon. No such luck. At 6 am of that day, my questions were still unanswered and if it meant having to go to the cafe every day, I would do so. If only the nights were longer, my shadow creatures would have more time to gather information, but for now, I’ll settle with keeping them hidden from plain sight. The fact that I’m a demoness still can’t be known. For my safety, and Jason’s.
Chapter 2 https://read.cash/@Hanzell/things-to-settle-im-a-demon-03035f04
Ack- I was supposed to do at least 1k words on this today but heck my laptop started getting buggy and I think that's from all the updates windows 11 is bombarding me with. I hate it but I'll have to be patient with it since I can't downgrade back to windows 10 anymore. But this much crashing is getting annoying and I am losing my momentum in writing right now
I knew it
**[WP] For some reason, you always suspected that your high school classmate can read minds. Determined to trip her, you keep cracking jokes in your mind, hoping to make her laugh, to no avail. One day, while idly thinking about how it would be to date her, you see her get flustered.**
Peculiar. That was the best way to describe the girl that sat in front of me. Junior year wasn’t anything remarkable, but having a transferee come in and having said transferee be seated in front of me was somewhat the highlight of my school year. Why? Because I don’t think I ever needed to ask her for anything. It was like… the moment a thought popped up in my head, she was already reaching back to hand me a pen or a piece of paper. It was seriously spooky and after a few months of continuously doing so, I tried asking her something strange.
“Hey, Edna-”
“Sshh I’m reading, Gabe” Her tone, although irritated, was still soft as she spoke to me
“Are you a mind reader?” I asked bluntly as I looked at her expression for any changes
She looked at me with an annoyed expression before shaking her head, “You need to stop reading those comics, Gabe. They’re giving you weird ideas”
“They’re not weird! Then how do you explain why you always know when to hand me a piece of paper or a pen?”
“Because you’re too forgetful for your own good. Plus, you tend to shake your desk too much, trying to find something to use. It gets annoying, you know”
And with that blunt reply, I grew flustered and never bothered with the idea again, but sometimes I would Think of the weirdest jokes and hope that she would react to those. I even tried looking on the internet for ones that even I would laugh and for the rest of junior year, I came to class, determined to remember the jokes and see if she would laugh. Nothing, no reaction. She would just keep reading and studying like how she’s always been since she came to my school.
By senior year, everyone got serious with studying, admittedly even I did so I lost time to do my usual joke hunting. Yes, I haven’t given that up despite her lack of response and despite the fact that she sat not in front of me now but a few seats to my right. She was still within view, though.
Actually, I had a better view of her from where she sat now. And it took me that long to really observe her features. She was beautiful, no doubt about it. Her light brown hair, which almost seemed golden from the sun’s rays, her hazel eyes, and her plump but small lips. They all suited her so nicely. I have no idea where the thought came from but I suddenly thought “What if we dated?”.
I was surprised to see her cheeks burning a bright red as she pulled her book higher over her face. Was she thinking of something? But even I couldn’t stop my thoughts when I saw her get that flustered. In a matter of minutes, I wondered if she would get that flustered if I kissed her. Or if we were alone. Even I grew flustered with the thought. I was already thinking of possibilities, like what if I held her close to me. Of what would happen if my hands were to rest on her hips.
It was fortunate that my train of thoughts came to a halt when the bell rang but I wasn’t quite ready to be dragged out of the room by Edna who was already as red as a tomato. I was suddenly shoved into the utility room then she locked the door. Before I could even ask, the plump lips I was just thinking about came crashing against mine. It was needy and burned with yearning. Was she perhaps thinking the same thoughts I was until the bell rang?
“Answer my question first. Were you serious about that dating idea of yours?” She grinned at me, and that teasing expression seemed to tell me that my guess was right. She was a mind reader.
“Do I even need to answer that now?” I muttered under my breath before I pulled her as close to me as possible. And let’s just say… we both skipped the last class
Hi hello! I'm just trying to see if I can still do prompts cuz I swear, I feel so out of practice so I'm just working through basic ideas before I dive back into the more action-packed ones that I used to write
Job hunting Vs. the introvert
So I have mentioned that I am now officially a Licensed Chemist of the Philippines and it is a huge achievement to have passed the exam, especially when the number of examinees was only 384 and that’s not even a sure statistic because I believe some people backed out on the actual day. Anyways, out of the 384 examinees, only 134 passed the exam and I am one of the fortunate people who was included in that. It’s something I am now proud of but then the exam was one part of the challenge.
The day the results came out, people then started emailing. And by people, I mean HR people from people who are hiring the newly licensed chemists. Yes, for the first week, I was flooded with emails from companies in the far parts of the country. It would be an honor to travel far, but the only time I want to ever relocate because of work again would be when I finally migrate abroad. Right now, I am aiming to work as close to home as possible. Based on my last laboratory experience, we get overworked here and when we finally get off work, the only thing I ever wanted to do then was sleep and draw. If the same thing were to happen, I would prefer that I work as close to my house as possible because it’ll be hell to readjust to traveling every single day. This is the reason why for one week, I was mostly responding to emails and interview requests with rejections. As much as it pains me to actually reject a good offer, I just want to enjoy the comfort of home.
For this week, though… I have had nothing but emails and interviews around my area and around the cities right next to mine. I was sadly rejected for the laboratory closest to my house, but I still have final interviews for laboratories that are right next to my city. I honestly have no idea where I’ll work with so I’m just seeing what they’ll offer on the final interview before deciding. Either way, I asked to be given until the 22nd to decide. And this is something I asked from all the laboratories that are interviewing me now. I also asked for the same pay grade and I’m happy that I don’t need to negotiate hard for my salary.
As of now, I’m pretty sure that it’s always safe to ask your seniors who have been to those labs because they give you good insight on what to expect. And right now, I have a full idea of each company and I honestly don’t want to work anymore because of these horror stories 🤣🤣🤣
Each lab has its perks, yes. But right now I am still weighing things out while checking if there are better and closer laboratories to my house.
I gotta say though, job hunting with a very introverted personality is a huge struggle. If you follow me on noise.cash, you would probably see how much I complain about how tiring each interview is, well, I’m not lying. The HR are persistent and they ask way too many questions. They are also way too high in energy and my low energy self does not know how to cope up with perky and preppy people. I hope I can finally make a final decision so I can have a really long break from all these HR people.
For now, this is my life and it kinda explains why I barely have the energy to do art now. My social energy is so low;;-;; it drains up all my other energy reserves. And I do think this will continue until I settle into a laboratory or something.
Extremely eventful days
It's been a while (again) since I last dropped by UmU
That was mainly because I went to visit my grandmother for the past few days. I had to rescue her from boredom and I was thinking that traveling would be a great way to distract myself while waiting for the board exam results. So on Thursday, I traveled north to where my grandmother's house is. Getting there took about 5 hours of my life (in which 2 hours of it was spent dozing off in the bus). I tend to sleep a lot when I travel because it is extremely tiring plus cars just make me dizzy in general so I usually sleep it off.
While there, I had a house tour and the repairs were extremely overwhelming, everything was so dusty. Luckily I met a cat that kept me company.
Her name is Miles. I think my grandfather mostly takes care of her but still. She's a sweet cat that has a thing for clinging. The following day, me and my grandma traveled down south. We went to my uncle's house in cavite. At 5am, we got up, packed up and booked a cab because I swear, she had way too much stuff she wanted to bring again. It always feels like I'm running away when I travel with my grandma. Always so tiresome.
The main reason we had to go there was so that I could receive an axie account and a few axies which was enough to start a team. I'm pretty sure they aren't strong ones but at least it's a good start? Anyways. Me and my cousin both have accounts and axies now and we're trying to remind each other to play because that's still extra income in a sense and I'm already a fan of games anyways.
I also took my sweet time exploring out back where I found the banana tree that always gave us yummy bananas.
Also.... Another cat friend 😅😅😅 I have a feeling I'm an animal magnet in one way or the other. Sadly we only stayed there for an entire afternoon. By evening, we traveled further south to my cousin's house because my cousin promised we'd go on a date after my boards and there's this soup shop I wanted to visit because it has an amazing view
Yes, I've had too much traveling in just a few days. By evening of the same day, we were actually just trying to figure out the axie game more. Trying to look up card combos and whatnot.
The highlight of that Friday night though was when my review school sent as a chat regarding the board exam list of passers. I honestly didn't want to open it at first but after a while I went ahead and checked.
On the very last page of the list, there I found my name! I swear it took me at least 5 minutes before I could process it. When it finally sank in, I was basically scream6amd shaking my cousin who was just next to me. Then I told my family and my friends and I have never received so many messages in my life! I WAS A CHEMISTRY BOARD PASSER! I AM NOW OFFICIALLY A REGISTERED CHEMIST OF THE PHILIPPINES AND I NOW HAVE THE RIGHT TO OPERATE IN A LABORATORY
A year of waiting was worth it. We couldn't celebrate much though so once I was updated with the status of my batchmates who also took the boards, I went to sleep 😅😅😅
The next day though, my cousin and I went on our date still. We originally went to visit that soup place I call "pares with a view" because I really wanted good soup whenever I experience something good. Idk it's a weird craving with me. Sadly it was permanently closed so we just went to the mccafe which had an overlooking view of Taal lake.
So my whole Saturday was basically spent there and with my cousin's dog, sunny. Coffee and dog, what would be a better way to enjoy passing the board exam ;;w;;
And now it's Sunday and I made my way back to Manila because I still have some business to attend to tomorrow :") I also need to update a lot of my work related accounts because now, I can proudly put R.Ch right beside my name. Ahh yes, the Filipino pride of having a title right beside your name is really something else.
As for my story that I left hanging.... I should really update that. But this will be my update for the day. Sorry for this pretty long rambling but I'm just proud of finally getting my work title and I'm happy with how these past few days were despite how tiring it was
Sitting pretty
**[WP] “And you!” he snapped, “You sit still and look pretty, that’s what I pay you for!” Fine—for the moment, she thought. His words had no sting. Her plans had been laid long ago. Now she smiled and watched as his works came apart.**
“Ladies and gentlemen! I welcome you to the house of oddities! Come ye! Come ye! As I present you with some of the world’s rarities and oddities! ” Repetitively, those words echoed as the ringmaster enticed people into what he calls “The house of freaks”. True to his words though. The contents of the attraction are nothing but rare and downright odd. Simply because none of them are truly humans.
The traveling carnival which has been gaining fame across Alluthero started with a few people. Simply the ringmaster and a few of his loyal followers. They first targeted small towns along the country's borders… as to why nobody knew. With each passing town, their numbers grew. As to where their new members come from, nobody knew as well. All people ever hear about is that with each town they visited, a new “attraction” would come up.
As they traveled into more populated regions and known trading routes, the odder their routines became. Everything seemed… more twisted in every sense one would look at it. How would I know this? Because I’ve been following their trails since the young mistress became a “member” of their crew. A crew would be far from it. I would say every member of that carnival was of supernatural origin and demonkind was no exception to their list. Many of my kind has been put on display, sitting idly for the ringmaster to give them a share of nourishment each day. Had it not been for whatever power this ringmaster had, I doubt any of these creatures would be working for him willingly. He just gives off this aura that would seem to frighten anyone.
“You lot! I believe I told you not to frighten the humans!” The ringmaster’s voice was booming, and it echoed even to where I hid “How many times do I have to tell you that if you make a threat towards the humans, you get punishments”
The next thing I heard was pained screams and yelps of who knows what creature it was that he was straightening up this time.
“I do believe demons can survive without nourishment for a few days? Isn’t that right, dear Estelle?”
My teeth gritted as I heard the young mistress’ name being mentioned so disrespectfully. So it was one of our kind again. This has been going on for far too long. As much as I am aware of the expanded lifetimes of supernatural beings and of the regenerative abilities, there is a limit. I hope the mistress’ plan and my intervention would all be worth it.
For hours, I lay in wait until the ringmaster finally retreated to his cabin on the far end of their campsite. The man had always valued his privacy, or maybe it was in those times that he did his dark arts. I could care less because soon this will all be over.
I took one last glance at the cabin, then I snuck into the tents where the demons were held. Filthy and bloody as always. I see he grew more merciless with his punishments. On one side of the tent, I see the bloody cage where Goliath sat with his back behind the magic imbued bars.
This was actually to continue to promote my drawings because why not? I've been meaning to give this pretty demoness a story of her origins and now I finally have the time to OwO this mini-series will probably be like...2-3 chapters long? We gotta build up her escape, after all. But I do think sitting pretty while silently plotting is perfect for my demoness since she has that really mysterious air around her
https://www.juungle.net/share/44ac4de861b280cbe799f3525ff62f1d8e0327a12aa070be444fc824e3faa4eb
And for anyone interested, she's still in juungle UwU she's still sitting pretty there too
Feel free to check out the rest of my collection too OwO
https://www.juungle.net/#/collection/ca495aa47f95e6f2c2a661f49ec17eac9534ebe792b66a93d93adcc0149594c4
Cuz right now I'm working on something vibrantly red again and it's pretty much hurting my eyes looking at it for so long XD
Back for good!
Hello hello!!!! I know I’ve been MIA for a while again, but as I have said so many times before, the boards really took up so much of my time, energy, and focus. You see, here in the Philippines, we have licensure examinations called board exams. A Diploma is not enough if you take up a highly technical course, like engineering, accountancy and a few other courses including chemistry. There are only a few courses that don’t need board exams. Those would be the vocational courses, the technology-based courses (like I.T. and other computer-related courses).
Honestly, diplomas don’t really mean anything sometimes unless you’re a board passer. You can say that it’s also investing in yourself but then it shouldn’t be made as a job requirement. That’s the thing with Asian countries like ours that is still far too reliant on the background than on skills.
Anyways, for the boards… well… my board exam preparation honestly was a bit stressful. First, because I handle food budget and menu planning at home and it was hard for me to trust my sisters with doing that because they tend to overspend when it comes to buying foodstuff. And they didn’t follow a menu so it kind of added to the overbudgeting.
Aside from that, I was pretty sure my mom was trying to fatten me up when she was around because she fed me food I loved (it’s mostly veggies though). So in the end, I did gain 4kgs from all that eating I did while reviewing.
As for my reviewing focus… well we had these international standard questionnaires: The American Chemistry Society (ACS) olympiad questions, and the GRE (which is for people trying to apply for masters). These two are well-known test banks the boards often took questions from. They both have so many editions and so many questions that anyone could use to supplement the 500 questions included in the board exam so the main goal was to understand why the answers were like that because it wouldn’t be unusual to see the exact question but with different numerical values for the given. So I answered all of those and each time I finished answering a booklet, I would immediately look up the right answer for the questions I got wrong because I learn faster from my mistakes.
This was basically my setup for weeks and it worked pretty okay for me because it focuses on more relevant topics instead of what I did before where I would read book after book of each subject.
2 days before the exam, my college roomy and I agreed to just book a hotel room since I doubt any of us could have woken up at 3 am just to meet a 6 am call time. It was way too early for night owls like us. So immediately after discussing that, we had a room booked for the duration of the exam. And it was a pretty good room for like $20 a night since we had AC, a fridge, a stove, microwave, and WiFi.
That's the hotel entrance and my college roomy XD I don't have a picture of myself, it's just weird for me.
Immediately after checking in, we just got our review materials out but I was more surprised that she bought gin with her XD so yeah, at 10 am, we were drinking gin to calm the nerves while we solved more questions for the 1st day subjects. We actually used to do this before major exams back in our college days so it was a nostalgic feeling to me. But it is weird to say that we actually have better computational abilities when we have a bit of alcohol in our system. And no, this is not a regular thing and we are not alcoholics but it has been months since we last drank together.
Aside from the gin when we checked in... we just relied on fast food for the exam days since neither of us had the energy to actually cook the food we brought with us. I am now still recovering and I've been trying to eat more fibrous foods to cleanse out my colon cuz I am really not used to fast food ;;-;;
This is the floor where my room was. The exam was held at a local college and in each room, there were only 12-8 people inside. Alphabetically arranged, I was in the last room XD and there were only 8 people in there, including me. The rest had 12 people in each room, I think. Anyways, for 2 whole days, I was freezing because my seat was directly under the AC and I was literally drained of brain cells because nobody imagined the board exam to be that bad.
Because of that, my batchmates who took the boards with me dragged me to nearby churches with each passing exam day. I honestly do not go to church so it was new to me and they even teased that I might melt if I set foot in a church (luckily I didn't)
So yeah, we lit candles. One candle per board subject and I knew I should have lit more candles because by the end of the exams... I wasn't even sure if I would pass that. This first church is Saint Jude's church
This was at Saint Sebastian. I was honestly just hoping for the catholic belief that is you enter a church for the first time, you need to knock on the door to make a wish
That basically sums up my exam days then immediately after, I was dragged to a spa then I just went into hibernation because I was pretty sleep deprived in the whole month that I was preparing for the boards. The next time you see me, expect an update on my juungle account or a short fiction again. For now, I just wanted people to know where I've been.
Where have I been?
Okay so I know I keep going MIA but I think most of you already know the answer to the question 😅 So where have I been? I've been cooped up in my room, trying to finish the 2,000 questions my review school sent. That while trying to look up the explanation as to why the answer is that way on the questions I'm unsure of or I am completely clueless on (which is honestly a lot 🤣🤣🤣🤣)
Good thing is, my scores are getting better with every 100 questions XD so that's a good thing to what I'm doing. I am now positive that I learn more from my mistakes than from my actual classes. and I have no idea if it's a good thing or a bad thing but as long as I'm learning, I think it counts.
Anyways, what else have I been doing besides studying? I've been trying to complete the board requirements such as the swab test, the prescribed attire, pencil, etc. I'm still planning what I'll eat for those 2 days too because we won't be allowed to leave the room so I'm serious;y considering packing a liter of coffee so I survive 2 days of hardcore examinations.
But that's not all I've been doing ;;-;; I'm still trying to find at least 30 minutes to an hour of drawing time because I need sanity breaks. I think I have more WIPs than I'd like to admit now but I'm trying to see this on a brighter side... And that means more stuff I can put up on the juungle when I get drawing time again.
This was supposed to be for my day 2 on the goretober prompt I was following ;;-;; but oh well, I guess my participation for artober will have to wait til next year or I try to catch up on November, who knows?
This one.... honestly needs a revision. But I do like the concept I had going here. I just lacked the execution power to pull it off. And maybe the imagination? Cuz I've never seen a bee hive before so I'm not sure how it should look like. Anyways, that one is a pending
Another one to add to my very dark and red collection. It's a guy smoking. I really want to work on this soon too because I think it would look really good as a phone background but I also think it would complement the kind of appeal I've been trying to pull off on juungle 😅😅😅
I don't know but I'm into real world scenarios and stripcore/grunge aesthetics so most of my digital art now comes off as sensual
This one... I'm still thinking if I should add it to my collection since It's a bit too cute for me? but then cute isn't all that bad when it still has my art style to it? Idk, maybe I'll play with this and make a few other variations for it? I'm still not sure but I'll look into it when I have the time and when I finally get the idea to face this again
Oh, I definitely need to finish this lady. She's a great fit for my collection approach but I might replace that blue caterpillar with a guy??? Still not sure but let's see where boredom and free time take me
And right now, this is where my free time goes. I'm pretty proud because of the low lighting ;;w;; and I can really make solid shapes that don't look so blurry now!!! It's a huge improvement to me, considering that I only started digital last year!
Have I been selling the stuff I draw? I actually do UwU I'm proud to say that this week, I sold 3 pieces from my collection!
These are honestly variations and I was surprised that people would actually buy them. But the reselling price I saw them have was the biggest wow of my life- the original soul is getting resold for 25 BCH and idk if I should be happy or not since I don't really get royalties from it???? but it feels like it's warding off other people when you put something up with that price-
And this one- it's getting resold for like 12.74 BCH and I have no idea why but I never expected that my traditional art would get much attention. Anyways, that basically concludes my activities as of recent. I will try to get back to writing regularly when I have another sleepless night. I'm pretty sure I had too much caffeine today so I'm struggling to sleep but writing helps
Artober is almost done
October 18, 2021 is today’s date. 18 days since Artober started and sadly, a few days since I could last focus on anything art related ;;-;;
It kind of makes me sad that I can’t put my all into art these days because my focus is shifted to my licensure exam reviews (We call it board exam here). It’s only 9 days until I have to walk through the exam halls to take the exams. Nervous is an understatement. More like… I know I’m lacking since I know I didn’t give this exam as much focus as I should because I mostly relied on continuously answering test banks, questionnaires, and quizzes my review school sends my way.
I’m not sure if it helps, honestly. But I do mostly learn from my mistakes, and yes, that applies to the wrong answers I choose with multiple-choice questions. I feel highly unprepared and disoriented with the proceedings of this exam and how to go about it. Like do we still follow the old protocols regarding attire? Do we still have to do what the previous examinees did? Just thinking that I may forget something makes me highly anxious but the fact there’s still so much I can’t remember makes me more anxious XD
I kind of regret not reading up earlier but I doubt I would even retain a majority of that information in my head. But then, I also greatly regret that I couldn’t follow a routine at all. I try but then my brain does have its limits. Right now, I’m just trying to squeeze time into everything and I’m kind of looking for time to draw but I really can’t manage to do that because my tendency to open up a new reviewer or a set of questions gets to me now. As much as art and drawing helps keep me sane, it’s a bit time consuming right now so I can’t give it as much time as I used to ;;-;;
Priorities right now peak at getting that license but I definitely will have a whole day drawing session when I finish those accursed exams. I want my sanity back ;;-;;
Despite that, I did manage to finish a few pieces and I got to post them on juungle, although it’s mostly a variation of one piece… but whatever goes, right?
So at the start of artober, I finished up my soul drawing that has been stuck in my WIPs for months now. I really made use of the layers for this one
Each variation was basically listed on the juungle and I gave the most colorful one to a user here since she’s always liked that piece since it was in my WIPs. I have no regrets about giving it to her ^w^
Then I also got to finish yummy vampire lips. That’s also in the process of minting but electron cash is being a bit buggy so I’m still waiting for the final confirmation before I can finally list it up on juungle. I’m not in a rush anyway so I can wait for that. Hopefully, it doesn’t take days for the confirmation though.
That’s about it for what’s been going on in my life and it kinda explains my absence… everywhere?
I honestly do want to read though but I’m afraid that if I read too much stuff unrelated to chemistry, the information in my brain might get replaced with something else ;;-;; so for now, your articles will have to wait til I have the time to because after this exam, I’m free again!!! Then maybe I’ll go job hunting after UwU
All that was left
I'm back ^w^ I have a bit of brain left from my review to write. Too bad it's another tragedy but I'm kind of working on the romance again
**[WP] End the story with this passage: "In the end, all that was left under the soft shade of the tree was a skeleton, holding on to an almost life-like statue in a gentle and loving embrace."**
In my hometown, there’s this tree that has been memorialized for a few decades now. How it became famous… well, there was plenty of stories and almost every story varied in one way or the other. But the most striking thing you’ll always notice each time you passed by that tree was a statue of a man and a skeleton that was basically stuck to the statue in such a tender, loving embrace. It was poetic in a sense. Almost like two lovers that never want to part. They probably were because I can’t imagine holding someone like that if not a lover or family.
I have noticed that whenever I go into town with my grandmother, and we pass by that tree, she would pause for a while and she would look at the figures with a sense of longing. Maybe grieve. I just couldn’t really tell. Sometimes a few words would slip but her voice was quite faint now to be heard amongst the bustling crowd.
“Gran, we need to go now” I looked at her again and saw that she was still fixed on her spot, staring at the figures as if she was reliving a memory of sorts.
“You two are unfair for leaving me alone. I could have helped you both” Her tone was heavy with dejection and longing that for a while, I didn’t dare speak
“Gran… Do you know those statues?”
Her trance broke and she instantly turned to me “Maybe I did. But they’re gone now”
She then turned in the direction of the house and left without taking another look. Gran just made me more and more curious when she has these moments. At home, we didn’t speak of the topic and the night proceeded as usual with us making dinner together and then cleaning up. Yet this night, Gran seemed to linger longer in front of the fireplace.
“Have something on your mind?”
I was greeted with a soft hum and a short pause as if Gran was thinking of what to say “I was just thinking about my older brother”
“You never told me you had an older brother” I pulled over a stool and settled next to her
“I used to have one. He made a big sin, you see” She patted a page on the photo album on her lap. There was a black and white picture of two kids and I assumed it was Gran and her older brother. “You know that old tree? That used to be an execution spot”
I was taken aback by its gruesome history when it now became a tree for lovers “What’s that tree got to do with your older brother, gran?”
“He’s the statue buried there. And the skeleton was his lover” A deep sigh escaped her as she seemed to be recalling fragments of her memory “My brother’s name was Edward. A happy lad he was. And there was the sacristan at the church, Angelo. He was an orphan yet he was allowed to play with us outside of his duties in the church”
I could faintly see her lips curling up in light amusement. I wish I could have seen the memories Gran had
“Anyway, they got way too close to each other. They started fooling around with each other and with their bodies. That tree was where they met up because no one dared to go to the executioner’s tree, yet they did. Sometimes I followed my brother when he kept telling me no because I wanted to play with them too but whenever I saw them by that tree, they would always be kissing or they would just sit there and talk and they always looked so happy like that that I didn’t want to bother their moment, especially when they just leaned incredibly close to each other. Even as a teen, I knew what that meant”
A smile crept on my lips with how she fondly described her eavesdropping and snooping “But what happened?”
Instantly, her lips curled in a frown “The church found out.” She cleared her throat “One night, my brother hadn’t returned and our parents didn’t think much of it because he was a young man by then. But it was nearing midnight and I was about to look for him but Angelo snuck into my room while crying. He kept apologizing to me while telling me to follow him. I did. We were at the executioner’s tree and there was something new there. A statue that resembled my brother. I asked him what happened but he just apologized and kept hugging the statue. I told him that he should try to get some sleep and that if he was free, he should help me look for my brother because if he was insisting that the cemented figure was my brother, it was a really disgusting joke.”
“Wait… so that statue…”
“It really was my brother. When I went back there… Angelo was gone too. He stabbed himself and nobody dared try to move him. Even the church that raised him. They kept saying he was a tainted child and that a proper burial was not fitting for such a child. In the end, they covered him with cement too when he was starting to decompose but it mostly only clung to his bones, which is why you could mostly only see bones on it. They even tried to burn down that tree but in the end, all that was left under the soft shade of the tree was a skeleton, holding on to an almost life-like statue in a gentle and loving embrace.”
White silence
This is just fiction. What goes on in the head of a madman trapped in an asylum’s solitary confinement. Although It's basically an extended version of something I came up with a year ago. IDK, I think it was good so it deserved more of an extended internal monologue. I just haven't found good reddit prompts I can happily work with again so I'm getting fiction inspiration from whatever piques my interest these days
I wonder if people ever noticed how fearsome silence and white light actually were. Silence in nature would always lead to a storm. As they say, there’s always a calm before the storm. Silence in a person leads to fear that something could be wrong, and silence in one's surroundings leads to madness. It was far too late for me to realize such things. Far far too late.
For the longest time, I always thought that the dark was something to be terrified of because anything could happen in the dark. In a minute or two, you could lose your life in the darkness. You could become something you thought you couldn’t be in the dark
That much was something I was fully aware of after having seen so many deaths in the dead of the night. And at this point, who’s to say that one of those deaths wasn’t caused by my own hands? After all, I wouldn’t be stuck in solitary confinement if I hadn’t committed something so grave. I can’t remember if I did though… I’ve been stuck in this room for so long now that everything that runs in my head had been muddled. All I remember was that I lead a miserable life of fearing the dark cabinet my mother had locked me in while I was growing up. I thought that was the worst place to ever exist in this world.
For the longest time, I initially feared the words “Get in the cabinet” Actually, anything that mentioned cabinet. It stuck to me for so long… But in truth, what I should have feared were the words “Take him to solitary confinement”
My first time in this forsaken asylum, I took lightly the idea of solitary confinement because I was sure it wouldn’t be so different from the cabinet. But when someone placed this constraint over my arms and torso, I knew it was far from that cabinet.
I was pushed into this white room that seemed so boundless, yet just a few paces around and you would bump into a wall. For a few hours in there, I thought I would survive the three-day sentence of being trapped in there. Another thing I never accounted for. I didn’t think I would lose my perception of time so badly in that white room. Now I understood why white flags were used to surrender.
I've only come to see that it shouldn't have been darkness and emptiness that should be feared but the blinding white of silence. At least in the dark, you see nothing but you could still hope that something would be there. There's still little hope that can motivate you enough to try to search for something. But in a white silent room, you see everything, and the agonizing knowledge that nothing is there and that no one will hear you no matter how hard you scream or cry will always be on the back of your mind. It isn’t in the darkness that you should feel hopeless, no. It’s in the white light. The silence will consume you and leave you to your own thoughts where the most gruesome of tortures occur. One quite comparable to a hundred demons whispering in your head. After just a few hours of being stuck here, I already knew that when my thoughts weren’t my own anymore, my madness truly began.
Eating a lollipop
**Media prompt.** Sorry, I wasn’t really in a mood to even be inspired by reddit prompts so I thought of going with media prompts for today. For this trial. I thought of going with something a bit out of character because I’ve been stressed and my eyes crave the color red when I’m in such a state. I have no idea why but I seriously think it’s linked to blood lust
Anyways, onto the prompt
10p.m. Friday night has barely started for me yet with the flashing red strobe lights and the few shots of alcohol already deep in my system, it felt like this night would be ending early for me.
I heaved a deep sigh as I finally slumped over the bar counter. I must look ridiculous by now but clubbing alone was probably a mistake one shouldn’t commit unless they have an incredible amount of self-control, something I don’t have.
“So what’s next for you, Cale?” It was Micheal, the bartender I came to be familiar with. He’s witnessed most of my clubbing moments and I can say that my secrets have been safe with me so far
“On the rocks” I waved my hand dismissively as I sat upright on the barstool.
“You look like you’ve had a bad week” Micheal stifled a chuckle as he gave me a look over
Yes, the dark bags under my eyes, the unkempt hair, and the lack of time to shave would be enough of a sign to say so.
“Congrats for figuring it out, sherlock” I answered sarcastically as I received the glass he pushed the glass of bourbon my way. I muttered a small thanks as I raised the glass to my lips. Within a second or two, almost a third of its contents was already gone and I relished the burning sensation as the liquid poured down my throat. “I needed that.”
“Need another one?” He asked as he wiped the counter clean
“Maybe in a bit. I’m gonna have a look around again” With that, I hopped off the stool and took my drink with me. The club was already in full swing. The smell of liquor and cigarette smoke filled the air. Bodies swayed and gyrated to the rhythm and the beats. Some people have already started the dark corners of the club for themselves.
I passed by one of them and what I saw had stopped me in my tracks. I do think I might have sobered up a bit when my eyes fell upon a pair of the plumpest lips I’ve ever seen. Of course, she was a sight to behold as well. Her ebony skin seemed to glisten under the red light and so did the lollipop trapped between her lips. For a second, I had to make sure I didn’t look like some loser but when her tantalizing hazel orbs scanned me up and down, I knew I should do something.
I was basically a shaking mess as I approached her
“Hey” I greeted awkwardly
A smirk played on her lips and before I knew it, she slowly pulled the lolly out of her mouth oh so teasingly slow. She even gave the round sugar crystal a flick of her tongue “Had a good enough look?” She teased.
“I-i don’t think I have” to stammer at a presentation was one thing but to do so in front of a beautiful woman such as herself, yet the more I stammered, the more she seemed to enjoy my flustered state “I’m mi-Micheal”
“Well Micheal, you’re adorable and I think sucking on this sweet thing’s gotten me thirsty”
Without a second thought, I pushed the cup of bourbon I had towards her and she could only chuckle in amusement as she pushed the cup aside and leaned dangerously close to me
“I was thinking of something else… Would you help me with this thirst I have?”
Her hot breath fanned against the skin of my neck and I was basically panicking upon feeling her soft mounds press against my chest. My primal instincts were already taking over and it would be embarrassing if she could already feel that bulge forming in my pants
“Um... I think… Can I help you with that somewhere else?” My cheeks grew flushed as I made eye contact with her. We stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity before she retreated and held onto my hand to lead me somewhere else. Surprisingly, that somewhere else was just behind the club building. It was hidden, yes, but I wasn’t so keen on doing business out in the open. I was going to suggest my car or my apartment but when I turned to her, I felt a stinging sensation on the base of my neck. She clung to me with her teeth buried deep into my flesh. And I could feel it, the blood leaving my body. The lightheadedness and the numbness that came along with forcing myself to stay conscious.
“I’m sorry sweetie, you were just blushing like a tomato when you saw me. I just couldn’t stop myself from thinking about your blood”
I fell to the ground with a thud, my consciousness slowly slipping. The last few things I remembered seeing were her red lips that once again entrapped the lolly before she turned and left me for dead.
This is semi self-promotion because I'm still in love with this lollipop nft I made
That which you can view here: https://www.juungle.net/share/7bad37e96010a4ec378cea6922b7a1bb23cacf91b8a35dc2f7ddaef8f22d5fdc
And now I'm thinking if I should do this more often because I really like giving my drawings a story behind them XD
Chemistry in life
You must be thinking that “Oh, is this one of her nerd talks about some products she finds interesting”
Partly it is but this time, the product isn’t something physical. It’s more on the intangible. This time I’m relating chemistry to life. Although I have done so when I first started out on the platform, I do think these lessons are much more important now that I’ve experienced more of life. I know not everyone will appreciate it, but these analogies pretty much helped me with my review and with my undergrad studies. And I do think they’ll eternally be useful to me even when I get older.
So what are these lessons that I live by?
The first is that **everything craves stability.** I know this is highly true with people. We want to be emotionally, physically, mentally, financially, and spiritually stable, but then, all things naturally tend to be. Atoms and molecules want the same too though. **They go into reactions just to achieve their most stable forms**. **They know when to give (ionic bonding), when to share (covalent bonding), when to let go and leave because their original bond was either too toxic or someone better came** (there’s something called leaving groups in higher chemistry and we always joke about them being like someone who gets cheated on), **and when to stay together so that they can form more stable bonds/compounds**. **They know when to be selective or not yet they lack the ability to manipulate**. That is something that I think we should learn. Let’s face it, we humans are pretty sentimental and stubborn yet we yearn for the idea of any form of stability. So sometimes it just makes me question if we tolerate the instability because we’ve become too attached to what we have now.
But then I do think that sometimes I lack emotional attachment to anything to be bothered if something changes (I only react with unexpected events like surprises because my introverted self needs a lot of time to process things) But then **it’s also good to stay low in energy.** I mean, I generally have low energy, but then what about other people? I have no idea where they get all that energy, but isn’t it tiring? **Yes, we all have different energies as atoms do and it is quantifiable as well,** but what about those that force their energy? Doesn’t it burn them out? Because **even atoms have their limits**. **Once they exceed a certain energy threshold, they find ways to emit all that pent-up energy and in turn, they either glow or they explode and all that energy comes crashing down fast**. I imagine it’s the same for people because I have seen people explode either from positive, or negative energy so here, you should really **know your energy limits** like how sodium knows that it can only reach the 3s and 3p spectra (it’s lame, I know XD)
Honestly speaking though, I do think atoms know themselves better than humans will ever know themselves. My appreciation for them is pretty much on a different level 😅 because **atoms don’t have the capacity to think yet they can follow trends that build the most amazing things (like the human body), but they understand when exceptions should be upheld.**
Ahh yes, call me a very hardcore nerd, but **to appreciate the smallest unit of life is to appreciate life itself.** I do think this is the key idea that I have and will always follow
Anyways, this is all for what goes on in my head and the very little motivation I know I can share with people XD
Writer appreciation
It’s been a great pleasure to be recognized by so many users I look up to here and I thought that for today, it’s befitting to show my appreciation to some users whose writings deserve some attention too. Sadly, there are many users I often read from here so to simplify things, I decided to go with the fantasy and fiction writing genre for now.
First off is fantasy and fiction since it’s one of my favorite genres to write and read from since I the day came onto the platform. In over 1 year of staying on the platform, I've honestly met and have interacted with some brilliant writers. I continue to do so, but I rarely do explore in these past few months because I have been busy with my board review.
To start off, I'd like to summon @Ozzyy OwO He's definitely one of my favorites even though I prolong reading his articles since he writes in series and waiting for each installment really just gets me impatient XD I like binge reading way too much so I really hold back on reading his work when he's working on a series. It's always worth the read though. Especially since he specializes in action and sarcasm XD
@Leo_kitti is also one of the fantasy writers I really look up to because she has that professional touch to her. And recently, her writing is really polished but that's what happens when you get to publish a book of your own already UwU She's a writer on goodnovel and she already has 3 books out!
Here's a link to one of her books but if you're a reader of the goodnovel site/app, go check out her other books: scorched, Hunter's Chorus, undercover
https://m.goodnovel.com/book_info/31000039026/Paranormal/Hunter
They're all amazing reads and one hell of an emotional rollercoaster so I usually need mental prep if I'm gonna be reading her writing. She also specializes in action but she does have her romantic touch to her work and I love that about her
@Ghostwriter is a fairly recent user ( I think? cuz it's only been a couple of months) he lacks the audience but I swear, you all are sleeping on this awesome writer UmU. His genre revolves around action, gore (sometimes XD I love the gore tho), and mystery. Yeah, he loves his dose of mystery and plot twists in his work and that's what will really keep you on his toes with his writing. Although all of the mentioned writers really make the best of their plot twists, he is the most memorable one to me, for some reason XD
@marcmire This man also lacks appreciation, I swear!!!! He's also been a member for a really long time now and when he first joined the platform, he mostly focused on poems until it just branched out. He's kind of like a mushroom that just pops in and out but each time he does, he leaves a little something behind to read and none of those are ever a disappointing read UwU He has a pretty unique perspective on some things so I really think it's worth giving those a read
@baoxian23 This woman keeps stressing me out with her writings XD
The themes are in no way child-friendly. They're a mix of heartbreaking, angsty, current (in a sense that they're common new-world people's problems with romance). I haven't been reading much again but I still know her writing style. They are so well polished and I do think she's also published a few books already? Anyways, she is definitely worth someone to check out because I do think you will get hooked on her one-shots just like I have. Strong but impactful is definitely the best description here
@gertu13 we met during a photography contest, actually. But then she started to write about the stories and lores of her country and I was really enticed by those stories. As time passed by, her stories branched out from detective and crime stories to some accounts based on her experience as a medical practitioner. Now, her writing tells more about her day-to-day life, memories, and a few fictions here and there. Each story has a lesson to them and these lessons are sometimes pretty motivating to me in a sense (although I really hate motivational writing). And she's really fun to talk to UwU but English isn't her first language but it's alright!
There were plenty of others that really stood out before but it's sad to say that they've been missing. I do hope they come back one of these days
Okay, after this, I’m not sure what genre I would write about besides science-related stuff because I never was a fan of motivation and those teen fiction some users write about. Maybe travels blogs because I do like seeing things from another person’s side of the world. I also like cultural things so maybe I’ll add that to my list, but not a lot of people write about their cultures, they mostly opt for general information and things that are easier to search or things based on their own experiences.
On a side note, I also would appreciate it if you could help out a friend of mine. I met her on noise.cash and she recently got diagnosed with Wallenburg Syndrome. I am not familiar with the disease since I lack a medical background but based on her treatment needs, it seems serious. If you have a noise account, please drop by her profile. She also has a read.cash account @Pachuchay
It would be great if you could help out with her medical expenses. Of course, what this article gets will also got to her since I want to have more interactions with her UwU she's kind of like an aunty figure to me already so I really want to do something for her
This is her info in case but again, you could give it to her directly since she's also a user here:
**Coins.ph** account : 09172594054 **bitcoin.com** : bitcoincash:qqqqyr2809sjrjmplprwc20l9cmn7l68ngca860t8r
https://coins.ph/ https://bitcoin.com/
Pleasant surprises
I've been way too preoccupied with cramming these days and I probably will be until the 27th and 28th of october (my board exam dates). Right now, I just went with something quick since I think all my brain cells got consumed from the 8 hour cram session with my profs from my alma mater. I'll post the 2nd part tomorrow after another cramming session XD I at least owe you guys that.
**[WP] You are a young prince. For years you've been guarded (and sometimes restricted for your safety) by a knight protector in heavy armor who has a hollow voice. One day at a royal banquet a beautiful woman waits for you by the stairwell. "Be cautious my prince, I am limited without my armaments."**
“Come on Alex, let me see what’s under that helmet” Charles whined out whilst reaching for the knight’s helmet.
“I’m sorry dear prince, you may not.” With a slight push, Alex had settled the prince back in his seat so he could continue reading.
Ah yes, reading, lectures, and a few official affairs where he would be summoned to attend. Such was the life of the crowned prince of Adrya. Being the only child, he hadn’t much of a choice with how he would live his life. The only thing that ever seemed to have lifted his spirits was being assigned a knight by the age of 13. Such was the custom of the royal family and for the first two years, he really did try to get close enough to the knight named Alex. Enough that this person wouldn’t be so mysterious to him anymore.
After being pinned down from his sneak attacks, pressed back to where he was seated or even reprimanded by his parents and the knight themselves, he gave up and he just shrugged the idea of by thinking “Maybe he has self-esteem issues or he’s doing it for his own safety” since it wasn’t unusual for knights to disappear or are targeted when people know they are among the higher ranks.
It had been 4 years since Charles gave up the idea of catching a glance of his mysterious knight so to suddenly ask to have the helmet removed, he didn’t know what got over him. Maybe he was hoping to know the face of the person he’s come to like so much. Or maybe he was hoping it would be a kind princess behind such heavy armaments. Whichever it was, the latter would be a better option with the crowning ceremony fast approaching.
“I hope you at least dress up for the crowning ceremony though. It would be nice to see you in a change of attire” His tone was pleading yet it wasn’t the tone that would pierce but the saddened gaze when he was again, denied the chance to see the face of his dear friend. “It could also be a good 16th birthday gift”
“I will ask the mistress to dress me in different armor if that would appease you” By now, Alex had somewhat found a way to tease the prince
“That’s not what I meant- but maybe new armor would be good. Let’s go check out new armor for you!” With a new thought on his mind, he got up from his desk and dragged the knight by the arm “To the smiths we go!”
Before they even got past the courtyard, a few knights came to stop them in their tracks “Where are you going, young prince?” Asked the one in front
“To the smith. Alex needs new armor for the crowning ceremony”
“I’m afraid Alex will have to go alone this time. We were given strict orders not to allow you to leave the premises” Before he could even protest, the knights were already guiding him back to the castle while Alex followed close behind
“Go get new armor without me, Alex” Charles could only smile forcibly as he ushered Alex to go on with the task “You have to show me what you get on the ceremony, okay?” With one last glance, he bid his goodbyes and allowed the knights to escort him back
Traditional art as NFTs
Hi Hi! I'm back after another long break. Sadly, my body's readjusting to a different time frame since I'm going nocturnal just to be able to study better. I have no idea why? But I struggle to study during the day, but not when it's around 2-3 am. I'm pretty sure I was supposed to be born an owl or something. Anyways, I was to give @MisakiLhaine an update for when I mint my traditional art as NFTs in the juungle. It's doable and after looking it up a bit more, I found that even on other platforms, artists also mint their traditional art and turn them into NFTs. The thing is, that minting traditional art is quite controversial of a topic.
NFT collectors value authenticity (this is based on searches I did before proceeding to do anything) I have no idea how valid this statement is now, but on a couple of platforms I've checked, if you apply as an artist and that you'll be minting traditional art, they will ask if you're on other NFT markets or if you sell your traditional art offline as well. This is to ensure authenticity, especially in the markets under the ethereum blockchain. They really value having only one piece available on the internet. I also don't know if people still do this, but sometimes, buyers/collectors ask to receive the physical copy of your art. I know this used to be a thing under the ethereum blockchain. I also read somewhere that some buyers ask for the original piece and any copy of the piece they bought be destroyed. It's a pretty extreme thing, but then you'll see there that they really value the authenticity of the piece they just bought, but I'm still on a 0/50 if it's a good thing or if it's just too extreme.
They also value a single art style. I do think that this is more on making your name and mark as an artist though since a style does define an artist, most of the time.
As for my first steps in minting my traditional art... it actually took me 2 whole days. While the minting process is already tedious, it becomes much more laborious when it's a traditional art. First, you have to scan your pieces or take a good-quality picture of them. I actually spent an entire day on this since I had so many pieces I wouldn't mind minting.
Then there's the editing if the scans came out with such high brightness that it altered your pieces way too much. In my case, since I compared my scans with the pictures I took, I stuck with the pictures so I only had to affix my signature and do very minimal retouches.
Once you're satisfied with your pieces, you have to save them as png. This was also another struggle since ALL of my pieces were over 50Mb in file size when I converted them to png. I had to compress them to 25 Mb or lower so I could upload them on github.
That's all the NFTs I've had to create in just a single day XD
I still couldn't overtake the waifuus and the rats but it's good to see that I have 42 pieces in my collection already. (You can view that here: https://www.juungle.net/#/collection/ca495aa47f95e6f2c2a661f49ec17eac9534ebe792b66a93d93adcc0149594c4)
For now, I'm just gonna keep adding more pieces to my collection while doing a bit more promotion on other platforms such as the mainstream ones. Juungle doesn't have that much exposure all in all so I do think this is a huge need. But then again, even the BCH community lacks exposure. Sure, it's slowly getting there because of Benswap and the SmartBCH network but it's still a pretty closed community so in a sense, this is how I'm promoting BCH, through art and through the juungle. I'm not sure if it will work with inviting more artists (to overthrow the waifuus) but since the minting process here is external, unlike in most NFT marketplaces, I think it'll take a while before the juungle will flourish like what you see on the ethereum blockchain. Still, it's not so bad to try. And through teaching new artists how to mint, I do end up teaching them about BCH fundamentals so it isn't such a huge waste of time on my end when someone inquires
That's all from me for today. I just wanted to rant a bit about my 2 day minting spree because I am never doing that again XD
I think, as soon as I finish a piece, I might have to mint it ASAP to avoid that kind of congestion again.
The cold steep project
Hello!!!! I'm back after being busy again for these past couple of days! Where did I go? Well the usual... Classes, review, errands, lack of brain cells then I also had to mint 36 NFTs in juungle and that honestly took 2 days of my life 😅
But aside from those, I was actually pretty preoccupied with our cold steep project.
I do think I mentioned enough on noise.cash about my and my sisters' coffee obsession. I even managed to write up 2 articles regarding the topic but both articles carry very different subject matters on coffee ( One where I talk about instant coffee: **Getting to know your coffee** And one where I talk about coffee acidity and how to reduce said acidity: Low acid coffee for me) So this time around, I'm pretty excited to talk about the coffee experiments we've been doing these past few days. https://read.cash/@Hanzell/getting-to-know-your-coffee-006fba74 https://read.cash/@Hanzell/low-acid-coffee-for-me-7745fc9d
We actually got a little too impulsive with this project because we ended up buying the coffee beans first and foremost and that was kind of bad since The coffee beans taste the best 10-15 days after it's been roasted. Any longer bean storage than that might reduce the flavors you want out of your beans since organic compounds and oils in the beans will decompose. So that was our first mistake.
We tried this out on 3 different beans first. Mocha (Yes, apparently there are mocha beans now and I still don't have enough research on this), Sagada medium roast and arabica medium roast. I don't like dark roasts that much and the point in this project is to make low acid coffee for my sisters and that includes the acidity in the beans. I also got this cute bag of coffee grinds though so I used that to test for water volume to be used in steeping
According to most courses, the ideal steeping ratio is 1:4 (the volume of the water is 4X the weight of the grinds). So when I tried that with a 20g bean grind sample and with 80ml water in a glass jar, it came out as something like this:
So this is 24 hours after steeping and the color looks so sad to me. I really think that 1:4 ratio wasn't it. But then we only tried this while waiting for our coffee grinder to arrive.
So this is our coffee grinder ❤❤ we call it hard grinder for some reason but oh well, at least it works hard to get the job done. So we have a burr grinder but we based our purchase on this webinar my sister watched. The first grinder we planned to get wasn't that different from this one but it's better to just crush the beans, not have heat from an electric grinder evaporate all the oils you want out of the bean.
This was our first batch trial. We used the mocha beans first and foremost cuz we were all curious about what that would taste like. For the stepping water, we went with a 1:3 ratio since the first trial failed at a 1:4 ratio. Look at that color though! It was a lovely color for that amount of water. And apparently, mocha has this really sweet natural taste to it that's pretty close to chocolate. No wonder it's called mocha. It's still the sweetest bean so far since the sagada beans have this kind of nutty taste to it. The last bean we'll be trying would be the arabica and we're all pretty familiar with that since it's one of the most used beans in most coffee shops.
We've been doing batches of these cold steep concentrates recently and based on the videos and articles we read, cold steeped concentrates can last up to a week in the fridge. For now, we have enough for at least 3 days worth of coffee in the fridge. If the taste by the end of the 3 days is not affected, we'll try to see if we can make a single batch for a week.
That's all from our coffee frenzy at home. Next update is regarding my juungle collection. I remember promising @MisakiLhaine that I'll update her on when I put up traditional art on juungle. On my next article, I'll do a bit of self-promotion again, as well as a few guidelines when posting trad cuz I did encounter a lot of problems so it would be best that other people learn from my mistakes so they don't end up wasting 2 days like I did XD
So this is my updated juungle collection and there's a lot of traditional art pieces in there now so feel free to check them out UwU
https://www.juungle.net/#/collection/ca495aa47f95e6f2c2a661f49ec17eac9534ebe792b66a93d93adcc0149594c4
Micellar water
I’m pretty sure it seems weird for me to be writing about beauty products but this one in particular is a pretty fascinating product to me. It actually holds a lot of basic chemistry concepts despite being such a simple cosmetic product. Plus I’m also fascinated by it because of its origin. You see, micellar water isn’t a new trend. It’s been around for almost a century already. The trend of micellar water started in early france. I’m not sure when exactly it started but the first company that utilized this concept is bioderma. It came out around 1913 and was followed by an American company in 1993. As to why micellar water became widespread was because France’s was mostly hard water. I don’t have much information on their water sources but seeing as they mostly utilized sea water and deep well water, it could be a factor in their water’s calcium and magnesium content. It could also be attributed to the fact that they have chalky soil in some regions.
Source https://maidsbytrade.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/How-to-Clean-Soap-Scum.jpg
This is what happens when soap is used in hard water. It's usually thicker though
**Why is oil mixed with water so fascinating?**
To understand that, we need to look at its individual key ingredients. The water part, and the oil part.
Source https://thethingswellmake.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/283-DIY-micellar-water-what-is-it-7.jpg
First is the water which isn’t really just regular water. And if you’ve worked in the lab like me, you’ll know that water isn’t just water because there are so many types of water. There’s deionized water, reverse osmosis water, distilled water, hard water, etc. For this particular product, although most beauty lines use “purified water” what they actually use is soft water (yes, there’s soft water and there’s also hard water). This isn’t harmful, don’t worry 😅😅😅 on the contrary, it’s actually the kind of water that’s good for people because of the lower Calcium and magnesium content in it (It’s opposite with hard water. Do you know that white stuff that builds up in the bathroom if your water is from deep wells? Those are mostly caused by hard water-binding with your soap molecules and it can be pretty irritating). But nowadays, they use other types of water like essence-infused water and whatnot.
For the oil part. I wonder if they taught this in high school but oils and water don’t mix. If you try to mix oil with water, they form these little separations called micelles. This micelle is the very soul of the product since it makes cleansing and moisturizing possible.
For the basic chemistry of it, we’ll have to look at an oil’s molecular structure. An oil and almost any surfactant molecule (including soaps and detergents) will have similar structures where they have a water-loving (hydrophilic) and water hating (hydrophobic) end.
Source https://labmuffin.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/surfactant-molecule.jpg
On a mechanistic view, these micelles are ingenious since the hydrophilic ends will face outwards while the hydrophobic ends will stay away from water. Despite the ball figure they make, the hydrophobic end will still be attracted to dirt. And this is where the “like attracts like” concept in chemistry comes in handy. You see, the dirt, make up and oil on your skin are basically hydrophobic. Same constituents so they’ll attract each other.
Source https://www.esteem-india.com/images/surfactants.jpg
But the difference between soaps and this micellar water is that it doesn’t make your skin dry like what happens when you just rinse your face with just soap. Also, because of this very gentle formulation, it’s good for all skin types, even the highly sensitive ones. And again, that’s because of the soft water they use for it. Of course, additional ingredients also contribute to the moisturizing properties of micellar water like the type of oil they used, the amount of glycerin, triglycerides, lecithin, and a few other ingredients that aren’t irritating to the skin.
There’s also something funny I found while looking up the ingredients of micellar water. Apparently, it’s not just the product itself that does the cleansing but also in the method of applying 🤣🤣🤣 So cotton pads have a lot of hydrophilic ends in their structures (which is why cotton is so absorbent). That very fact means that the hydrophilic ends of the oil/surfactant molecule have something to bind too. And instead of the oils forming micelles, they leave the hydrophobic ends fully exposed to make dirt/carbon absorption much easier.
Source https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Mdzme6T5W0I/V91ojhXwUOI/AAAAAAAAB-I/eD_QCWcEsZgD38Lu24_vlLo0V54YnE2QQCLcB/s640/Cellulose.jpg
All those -OH (hydroxyl) ends are the ones that attract the hydrophilic ends
Source https://www.bioderma.us/sites/us/files/styles/ultrawide_image_text/public/2020-02/micellar-water.jpg?h=d1cb525d&itok=3l35Tf3V
Sot this is what it essentially looks like on a bigger picture. And this logic kind of makes the surface area in which micellar water reaches larger compared to your soap and water.
It’s funny to me but it does make sense but I’m concerned with the environmental impact of the disposable cotton people use. I hope they do something like inventing reusable cotton pads for makeup.
This is enough of my chemistry rambles for the day XD
**Related article:**
https://read.cash/@Hanzell/chemistry-for-the-day-kojic-acid-vs-glutathione-vs-collagen-24d03cca
Comfort in the moon
I can't seem to find a good prompt or idea to base off today. Probably because I'm still too concerned with my injured thumb and the fact that I don't feel too good because being stranded for 1.5 hours gave me a bit of a cold... So I think I'll be posting something I revised for a lesbian tragedy months ago. It was rejected, of course, but The feedback from them was helpful. Anyways, enjoy!
I never could have imagined myself being like this as a child, but as I grew older I came to trash the idea that love only existed between males and females. Never had I been so wrong in my life. Around the age of 15, I first found attraction to a girl. Or more like… I became fascinated with one at first. Although I, myself, was a girl too, I never perceived myself as such.
She was everything I never was and everything I wanted to be. Perhaps it was just jealousy, my mind whispered to itself. Perhaps I just wanted to be popular as well, but it didn't seem the case because popularity would require me giving up some aspects of my hobbies. And I never wanted that. I simply couldn’t imagine myself ever giving up my artistic side for the shallowness of popularity. But then, being popular could mean that I’d have more opportunities to get close to her. But it seemed too far-fetched with what reputation I had already established in my junior high life.
But I still couldn’t deny the fact that my gaze would always fall upon her, or I would just subconsciously seek her out from the corner of my eye. Oftentimes I stole glances of her as breaks were given in between classes. And there would be times I would look up my friends in the same class as hers as an excuse to see her more. Eventually, I came to ask her to be my model for my sketches. She never replied and I passed it on as a joke, but she did know my reputation in arts and she very well respected that. I was honestly surprised that she even heard about me when I was counted as the isolated weir girl from class B. Yet I was thankful and it spared me the embarrassment of having to explain in detail.
I showed her my sketches, and ever since, we would stay after school and she would choose the best locations where I could sketch her. They weren’t good ones, but she seemed to enjoy the attention. And for the first few times, I sketched her, I was quite embarrassed. Was I even allowed to look at her this much-
She found out we took the same route home so eventually, we fell into the pace of walking home together. The closing distance surprised me more so than anything that's ever happened in that year and I was always left wondering if I should be grateful for it. It also expanded the locations where I could sketch her and each time I presented my finished sketch, she would be ecstatic at how I could capture her in such fine details. If only she knew how I saw nobody but her.
My attraction for her grew as the days passed by. I saw and embedded into memory much more than she would ever hope for and much more than she would ever know. I was positive by then. I was falling for her.
It took me months, maybe an entire year before I ever gave thought to tell her this. Even I was in shock. I needed much more time for this and oftentimes, I would climb up on the roof to ask the moon and the aloof clouds for guidance. It never did help but something about the clouds in the night sky always managed to give me peace.
On the day I resolved myself to admit things that needed to be said, she just looked at me in horror and she was shocked that all that time spent together, such a thing was my motive all along. I was misunderstood and was frowned upon. I consulted to the evening sky once more that night and hoped it would help me this time. It gave me nothing but silence. If silence was the answer, maybe I should stay silent. I nodded to myself and stood on the window ledge. I jumped. And as I fell, I was greeted with the same evening sky that had comforted me in all those times. I'm glad to have seen such beautiful clouds illuminated by the moon before everything went black.
Art update and art block
I just realized that it's been over 2 months since I actually gave people here a view of my art on this platform 😅😅😅 My apologies but A bit of self promotion is needed too and right now we're back to that since I did update my juungle listing. As of recent, I have 12 items listed in my juungle collection (you can check that collection here: https://www.juungle.net/#/collection/ca495aa47f95e6f2c2a661f49ec17eac9534ebe792b66a93d93adcc0149594c4 )
I'm also pleased to say that someone bought my cute little froggo UwU
Although nothing has followed since I'm so lazy at promotion. That doesn't stop me from trying XD I'm pretty sure people will notice us, other artists, up there too, not just the creators of waifuus.
So what's new and what's been added to my listings.
https://www.juungle.net/share/ce001d3e0f46050accfd6469b4d54f7b6f5a4a194baf55e6709b6992987eabbe
A majority of my listed items are actually from the art activities done in @ArtPark And this is one of them. This is Kenshin from ruruoni kenshin. It was actually a huge dilemma on whether I should post any of the DTIYS (Do This In Your Style) due to many legalities but I honestly gave up thinking about them so I ended up adding them to my collection eventually. This piece is also some of the recent ones that I'm really proud of because in the HD copy, I was really proud of the detailing level I've come to achieve
https://www.juungle.net/share/c373293e4d8cfd46413f10c38bc1af6bb0170d581074c86fd69c63e66d25ba7f
Another piece I'm pretty proud of. It's one of the 3emoji challenges that happened up in noise. For its one, I really wanted to practice my monotone shading to still make it realistic. The result wasn't so bad though it was originally nude art. I feared for the safety of my account though so that mist veil was basically an attempt to make it more decent XD
https://www.juungle.net/share/1735aaed3871a765ef26cd66bb2c7c5a8b76551c0ad72cc5c928b8bc9d01007e
I'm also proud of this but kind of disappointed at the same time. I'm proud of how good the shading is but I'm also disappointed because I realized I really have no talent for copying styles 🤣🤣🤣 In the end, it still followed my art style, and it isn't so bad but I was hoping to break out of my style by trying other styles that was pretty close to mine
https://www.juungle.net/share/38bdd5907e0a49528420f5516ad3a9a8b9c88bafc3d9e4101b94025830509741
This one was rather disappointing too because of how rushed it was plus I didn't bother to do any form of clean up before I added it to my listings. It just stayed as-is. And It was actually an attempt at glow art. The glow art wasn't as bad as I first thought it was. But it definitely needs improvement.
https://www.juungle.net/share/0b73cf9bf4311ac1b6b8f1cf83d4147a564e8d70f178670e8183f5d46908cb77
I'm actually more proud of the bottle than the axies tbh. This was an entry I made for a twitter art contest. It was a crazy competition with over 1500 entries so understand why my entry didn't stand out much. The other entries were awesome!!! And I really salute them. At least I have no regrets with my entry so I'm sharing it with you guys XD
So aside from having updated my juungle listing. I'm just stuck in a digital art block. I can't decide if it's because my board exams are really close, which is why I'm way too anxious or because I'm just looking for new inspiration. I honestly feel bad for my works in progress that I had big plans with. But I was talking with a friend and she said it would be better to put them in as a Halloween special because of how creepy they are 🤣🤣🤣 And I'm actually considering that
Like with this one where I planned to have multiple glowing versions of but I'm still honestly still experimenting with layers. For now, I don't know how I'll fix the layers up but I really need to give time to finish this one up.
This one too. I definitely need to finish the main drawing before I play with the glow effect but I just couldn't help myself 😅 The green one looked really ghostly but both of these drawings will get a red, blue, deep violet, and a green version. So I imagine listing 5 items and all of them would be for the same price but I'm still thinking if I should take that suggestion just yet
Then this is one of my recent good ones that I actually finished. I'll put him up eventually. Maybe when I actually finish up the 2 glow art I wanted to sell.
That's all for my art journey these past few weeks. I'm still hoping I get out of this art bock and get over my laziness, tbh
On a side note: you see my art progression here:
https://noise.cash/u/Hanzell
since I usually upload sketches, drawing ideas and the final output here ^w^
Related articles:
Into the Juungle we go https://read.cash/@Hanzell/into-the-juungle-we-go-db33ba69
Images in the sky https://read.cash/@Hanzell/images-in-the-sky-62c8bac2
@Hanzell
