Yesterday I read the article published by @HappyBoy titled "My choice". In the article, he discussed the issue of parents trying to influence their children's choice of career and the effects of such actions on the children's future. My comment on the article is what informed the title of this article.
Looking at it, there are several reasons why parents would want to influence their children's choices of careers, but the obvious among these reasons is the fact that most parents think of their children as their retirement plan. It's kind of odd to me to see parents thinking about their children as a kind of asset or investment that will yield dividends for them in the future when they retire from active labor.
It's common today to see parents who want their children to stay in their shoes by fulfilling their lost dreams. This is a battle in most families leaving the children helpless and powerless in choosing the careers that they are most passionate about. But I ask why do most parents want to be at the driver's seat for their children's choices of career?
While it is one thing to want to influence your children's choices of careers and shape them into their dreams, it is a completely different thing to want to steer them to your ideal career without you getting any of the returns. Most parents will do that simply because of the influence of the feeling of retirement on their lives. If you ask your parents why they want to steer you to their chosen profession, chances are that they will tell you that they do not want to suffer lack when they retire from active labor. In this sense, it is clear that the parents consider their children as their retirement benefits which is a total error and an unlearned decision.
It is the responsibility of parents to train their children to the best of their abilities, not in the sense of getting payback in retirement, but just being the best they could be. A good man leaves an inheritance for his children and their children's children. Your children are not your retirement plan. If your children are the blessing of your lives and you are looking forward to meeting them as long-term guests, then they are the ones responsible for how they choose their careers. You can also influence them but you are not in the driver's seat. Do not force your children into doing what you want.
Unfortunately, most parents today have been failing their children in their choices of career and end up being disappointed when they get to retire from active labor. Ultimately, our children should be the responsibility of parents not the responsibility of children to parents. Genuine children are the children of their parents. They will always come back to appreciate their parents' efforts for being there for them when they need them during the time of their training. The children of these parents who know about what it takes to become the best will come back to their parents to give their due respect and gratitude to their parents for raising them well. This is a good way of building a strong relationship with your children.
The ultimate duty of a parent should be to have something to leave for their children when they depart to shore beyond life because they are the reason why they are alive. Your children don't owe you anything, you owe them everything including your life. The parents who leave an inheritance to their children have demonstrated that they had the means to earn and they know what to do with what they have. This is the way it should be.
As parents let's have a better orientation about parents and children relationship, work for your children because they are yours and not for a reason seeing them becoming your bank accounts when you retire. Be the best parent you can be for your children and provide them with the best tools to get what they need for life. That is your responsibility, and remember, your children are not your retirement plan. So, don't force your children to do what they don't want, they can't live life for you.
Conclusion
Therefore, parents, it is time you took back your right to form your children, and even if they choose to be different from you as they grow up, they are adults and you have to respect that they are living their lives on their own ways. Seeing your children as your retirement plan makes you put unnecessary pressure on them and could lead to a bitter experience should they fail to meet up your expectations from them.
Life is not a picnic. So, it is important to know that our children do not owe us anything but they have to respect us for being the most responsible and great parents we could ever be. That way, we are able to demonstrate the fact that our children are the blessing of our lives. This is the reason why I conclude that our children are the only responsibility of the parents. Let's give our children the best of our ability so that they can have a better life than we did.
Many parents has ruin the life of their children, there was this video I saw on the media months back, a man saw his brilliant high friend and he was shocked on the kind of work he does, so he asked him how he ended like this and he said that, he wanted to an engineer but the parents wants him to be a doctor, to cut the story short, he became a wheelbarrow pusher all because of his parents.