Have you ever been bullied?

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Avatar for Eybyoung
4 years ago

We often wonder why some people are too hard, so mean and so bully. Bullying is not new to us, it usually happens when we are still kids. We met bully classmates at school, even now that we are adults we still meet people who are a meanie. They tend to criticize other people below the belt without considering their feelings

We are wondering why they're doing that even if we didn't do anything to them.

What are the factors that cause behavior changes?

  • Lack of attention- in this case, they're lacking attention from their home, maybe their parents are too busy that they can't give time to their kids. It changes the behavior of the person when nobody is giving you the attention you tend to find it in another environment. That's why they try to bully other people to get attention, to get the praise that they are strong to bully naive people without thinking they look more pathetic lol.

  • Peer influence- When parents hardly giving time to their children, these kids will always play with their friends. And friends are always an influencer, as the saying goes "birds with the same feathers flock together" you can never be friends with somebody if it always opposed your actions and opinions, well this applies to young people as their minds aren't that broader like adults do. So if the kid has a bully attitude much likely his friends too will imitate.

  • Been Bullied- well there are cases like this when somebody is being bullied, they try harder to fight back and protect themselves but cannot able to defeat the one who bullies them, so they try to bully other persons.

  • Not well treated at home- broken families are rampant nowadays, kids tend to see their parents arguing or fighting. In this case, the kid thoughts that fighting anytime and anywhere is okay. That it's okay to have a fight with anybody because their parents do it in front of them. And sometimes they are beaten up by their parents so they'll beat up other people to vent out their anger from their home. Or they are left by their parents, that nobody cares for them so on the contrary they also do not care about others' feelings.

  • Stupidity - some people are just stupid they don't think about others as long as they satisfy their stupidity.

I personally have experience being bullied when I was a kid, a grade-schooler. My classmates beat me and pull my hair every time the classes ends, walking going home they'll beat me up for no reason. I was too naive to fight back at that time, I will just do my best to find ways how to escape them. I'll just run but I'm a slow runner so they'll catch me. Whenever I was near our home, they'll leave me alone. That's the cycle when I was in grade 1. I never told my parents because they don't care too. I was often bullied before because I'm always transferring school. Due to my family always got troubled and changes place to live.

When I reached High School my attitude changes, I became bold and blunt. I became a bully myself, I bully and tease other naive classmates. Some people who know me being so quiet when I was a grade-schooler can't believe I'm a bully in high school. They wondered why I have a drastic change in behavior. I don't care about people's opinions and don't care about their feelings. Nobody can hurt me back then because I don't care about anything or anyone. Getting in trouble, and I don't give a damn. Even my teachers are having a hard time scold and understand me 😂 because even if they scold me hundred times, I don't care 😂 to think I'm a girl but acts more than my boy's classmates do. I'm a product of a broken family and being molested too.

But when I overcome everything, I became more responsible and sensible. I'm not like that anymore now 😁😁

Home is the foundation of our growth, our psychological factors will be determined by how we are raised.

To the parents who are reading this article please give time to your kids, give them the attention they need. Guide them and teach them good manners so they will be good citizens when they grow up. Try to listen to what they're saying, hear them out. Don't call them bad names when they do mistakes, it makes them believe that's how they really are and act on it. (I also experienced being called in bad names, what a pity and it's not really good 😒). Being bullied and a bully can bring serious damages so we should look out our kid's behaviors.

To those people who encounter mean people just let it pass, maybe they're just altering their ego. But if they cross the line then, suggest them to visit a psychiatrist. If it involves physical injuries then you have to do legal actions. Don't be scared, fight back. Nobody deserves to be bullied and nobody is entitled to be a bully.

I'm open for additional info about psychological issues just do your comments, this is all facts taken from my experience and I stand to be corrected if I'm mistaken.

Everyone wants to listen, craves attention, and needs moral support so let's give this at home so our kids will not be lost in the wilderness.

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Comments

I've been bullied before and do cutting classes because of that

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4 years ago

Oh, sad to hear that, bullying is not really good esp. for kids it will affect us.

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4 years ago

Oh hidden fact .... Have been bully before back in early college... people bully me because I was short and fat in stature🙈🙈🙈🙈 it wasn't easy though because it afffected my self esteem then

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4 years ago

Yeah bullying can affect our self-esteem, good thing you able to overcome it?

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4 years ago

Yes I was bullied in highschool haha because I don't want my classmates copy my answers especially in exams time 😊😅 and yes I was depressed a bit ,

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4 years ago

good to know that your bullying experience isn't that serious which caused physical injuries 😀 yeah right it's too bothering being bullied.

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4 years ago

Nice. Very well said. I didn't experienced being bullied. Just being called in bad names. But it's not that bad.

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4 years ago

I felt really bad being called in bad name because my mom do that, almost every time. Well past is past hahaha kaya intindihin mo na lang yung bully na write dito 😂

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4 years ago

Haha.. Nabanggitan na naman 🤣 grabe naman si mama mo, siya pa mismo nambubully sayo 🤦‍♀️

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4 years ago

Hahahaha kase nagawa ko tong article na to dahil sa article mo 😂 oo dati pero bumabawi nmn mama ko ngayon, na realized na nya mga pagkakamali nya nung panahong parang ayoko na sa kanya 😁

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4 years ago

Nice. Yun ang maganda bumabawi. Kaya ako nalang bumabawi dun sa isa e. Hahaha. Nilalike and inupvote ko yung article nya e😅

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4 years ago

Hahahhaha ang bait mo nmn 😂 ako nga subscriber ako don kahit ganon mag comment yun 🤦

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4 years ago

Edi mabait ka din pala 😅 pero magaling naman kasi talaga sya magsulat. Very creative kaya deserve nya naman ang upvote and thumbs up 😊

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4 years ago

Oo interesting nmn mga articles nya may matutunan rin tayo, nvm na lang pag mag comment satin..

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4 years ago

Yes. Atleast ngayon naiintindihan ko na sya.

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4 years ago

opo minsan din ako nabully pero tumigil din kagad dahil nalaman nilang pumapalag ako at nalaman din nilang may mga kaibigan akong basagulero.hehe kasama na ako dun hehe..highschool po ako nung nangyari yan first year syempre di pa namin kilala ang isat isa kaya yun nakatikim ng pag gulong sa hagdan yung nambubully sakin, ending? syempre principal hahaha pero di pintawag parents namin warning lang buhat nun iniiwasan na ako biruin ng di maganda ng mga classmate ko haha

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4 years ago

Oo nga uso nmn talaga bullying pag grade school at high school.. tama lang na pumalag talaga pag binully ka kase kung hindi naku araw arawin ka non hahaha. Usually nmn mga bully e mga lalaki hahahhaha nga basagulero peace Hahaha okay lang yan, masaya rin nmn minsan makaranas nang ganyan at Least di naging boring ang life hahahhahaha pero di nmn talaga natin deserve ma bully at mang bully.

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4 years ago

hehe ok lang meron pa pala bigla ko tuloy naalala ibang section naman haha may mga arcade pa sa amin noon sa maliit na mall habang nagaarcade ako nakursunadahan ako ng isang estudyante rin taga ibang section nilapitan ako hinahamon ako haha diko sya pinapansin sige lang ako sa paglalaro ko hanggang sa napansin sya ng classmate nya nilapitan kami at nakilala ako humingi ng pasensya ung classmate nya winarningan sya na dimo ba kilala yan hinahamon mo??yun lang narinig ko umalis na sila hahaha,,,yabang ko no pero yun yung totoo eh hehe

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4 years ago

Hahaha ikaw na siga 😁😁😁 normal lang nmn sa mga lalaki makipag suntukan haha. Bsta di lang serious injuries, iwan ko kasama ata yan sa paglaki nyo 😁

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4 years ago

haha oo natural nang nagyayari yan maiinit pa ang mga kabataan hehe,pero nung nasa tamang edad na lie low na sa mga ganun iwas na hanggat maaari dahil naiintindihan na natin yung kahalagahan ng walang kaaway o kagalit...

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4 years ago

Oo nga tama ka, pag nasa tamang edad na tayo ma realized na natin at nag iingat na na di maka offend nang ibang tao..

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4 years ago

Children can be harsh from time to time. Especially peer presure is highly common while they are growing up. It might be a part of human nature but it's a bit crucial :) We all either experienced or witnessed such bully acts from people around us. I assume this undesired behavior occurs due to unhealty psychological reasons.

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4 years ago

Yeah you are exactly right, it's all related to unhealthy psychological reasons. Our society can be harsh environment sometimes so we should be vigilant to watch out our kids as they grow and guide them properly.

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4 years ago

By the way can I ask you something? Can I post my written articles here on hive? Or not? Hehehehe.

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4 years ago

You can post similar post on hive but not the same because it would be duplication. Just make some adjustments and publish on Hive, as well.

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4 years ago

Okay thank you 😊 I will do some revisions before posting it.

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4 years ago

Yes I have been bullied I felt bad but it taught me a lesson

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4 years ago

Good for you, just keep going 😀

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4 years ago

I have experienced it , during my younger years in school but I have learned to grow a thick skin over it over the years by focusing only on the people that I love and those who love me for who I am period . Bullies are weak and insecure people who are looking for someone to save them and put them in the right path in love .

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4 years ago

Exactly! They're full of insecurities that tend to alter their ego just by bullying others I can tell that because as I've said in this article I was onced bullied and a bully. Agree with the last part, looking for someone to save them to put them in right path in love, because that's what really happens to me, I was happy then I found my saviour hahahha

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4 years ago

I don't like bullies. I haven't been bullied (as far as I know) and I don't intend to be. Bullies are weak actually, they may look like they're strong and whatnot but no, they are weak. If you're a strong person you don't have to belittle anyone just to make you look strong. And I admire those people who stood up for themselves and turned away from bullies. Those people that was bullies and got the courage to stand up. I admire them. They are the real strong people.

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4 years ago

Yeah bully people are so pitiful in real life, they thought bullying make them look strong but it's not, it makes them look pathetic. Well if you dig deeper with their attitudes it has really phsycological issues as what I said in this articles.

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4 years ago

exactly///

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4 years ago

Bulli cant give pain to the person but being the one ho is making bullied to a person is is the person that have an mental or luck of attention

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4 years ago

Exactly that's what I'm saying in this post 😀

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4 years ago

bullies are sad person looking for attention. we just need to understand them at some point.

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4 years ago

Bullying?yeah,i have been bullied before during my school days also and it really affects me especially my self confidence,but now i already forgive them....

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4 years ago

Good to hear that you already forgive them 😀

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4 years ago

I also experienced being bullied because of my nose. At first, it hurts me, i questioned God about it. I lost my confidence to the point that Im afraid to engaged with others. Until I met a set of people who lead me closer to God. From the time, I accept who I am. I accept my imperfections and I never feel pain when someone throws a word to me. I started to gain more friends again. I am confident enough also.

Nowadays bullying is still the problem on schools. I dont know why they are like that. Whos in responsible about their behavior. The parents? the environment or their own insecurities?

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

The three factors you've mentioned as per your question who is responsible for their actions was the answer. When they're still a kid, their parents should be responsible to their behaviors, and environment is also responsible for that, as environment is also an influencer but this goes back with the parents, they're the ones to control it. Environment is a stationary so parents should act on how to minimize the interactions with it. When that kid grow up then that's the time they'll be the one who is responsible for their actions. We cannot control other people so let's be though on dealing with bullies. Learn to fight back in right manners.. sorry for your experience but be thankful it has bright side too as you became closer to our God, in a way maybe it's just a calling so you can seek refuge to Him.

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4 years ago

From my own kids' school: They have the idea that everyone must be included. I told them nobody has the right to be my child's friend. I told my child to treat everyone with due respect, but she doesn't have to be their friend. (Disassociation is always right, and you never have to justify it).

I got a lot of flak for this from the school and other parents, but it is still true.

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4 years ago

Exactly sir, we must educate our child that way. To treat everyone with respect but doesn't have to be so close with them. Thanks for the upvote and thanks for dropping by 😊

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4 years ago

I never bullied but been bullied these days people would call it discrimination. To be honest I do not believe in the reasons why someone starts bullying and talking with a bully will not change it's behavior either. Some people love to see others suffer and what one considers as bullying another calls normal child behavior. (it was what the school doctor said about a kid sexual harassment kindergarten kids).

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4 years ago

Well in that case that's another level of bullying, when the damages involved physical harassment and sexual harassment. There are really deep reason if you dig deeper as per why they start bullying others. Something deep, that kind of people who are doing horrible things is beyond bullying they must see a doctor to seek medical and psychological help. Sorry for your experiences these days, I wish you stand firm and don't let discrimination penetrate your soul.

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4 years ago

Discrimination never penetrated my soul because as I grew up no one used that word. People use it for everything these days to get a right they never worked for or do not deserve. I was told to work, learn, and not anyone stop me because of my gender or the color of my skin. If you start thinking you are discriminated you see everything in the light of discrimination.

It's the same with bullying. Not everything that children or adults do or say is bullying. You have to learn to see things in perspective too but some people do love cruelty and being a psychopath is not triggered by being bullied or a "bad childhood".

I agree with you that what that kid did and probably still does is sick. According to the school doctor, it is normal. If my son would do such a thing I would teach him a lesson he would never forget and for sure not love or help him.

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4 years ago

Exactly, if your child has an attitude Problems then we must be alert to teach them and guide. Love them more so they'll be a better person. Home is the foundation of our traits. Good to hear, you never let down yourself by discrimination we are in a cruel society we must be tougher.

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4 years ago

I agree. You have to learn to be tougher and not to see everything as a personal attack. My kid was bullied it was personal. After we moved and it went to a different school it felt like being bullied again. Perhaps it was but as far as not in the same way. I asked to observe what is going on. If it was the only one or other children were bullied too. It turned out all children we're bullied in turn and it was not a personal attack but more like trying out each other's boundaries. You see the same in the animal world although if we take monkeys for example the young monkeys bully the elderly and are corrected by them. We don't allow that and correct bit tell children to go outside and do such "childish" behavior with their friends.

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4 years ago

Yeah right, you hit the spot. Taking it personal is not a good idea bcoz, we are not the only one being bullied or our child. It's really a natural course in the society that cruel people exist. This will also thought us how to be tough and protect ourselves or so our child.

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4 years ago