The End of The Unlabeled Love Story: Final Goodbye

Oh well. Look who's writing a farewell letter again when the last time I wrote about this unlabeled love story that initially started through a dating app was when I was asking if Is He the One already? I guess, some things just don't work out the way we want them to be.

So this is me again publishing the letter I wrote for someone whom I met through a dating app that I fell too hard for.

I usually write letters to every guy I fall for. It's my weird but creative way of moving on. I get to write down everything I didn't get to say and also explain my side of the story.

I actually haven't sent this letter to the rightful receiver yet but I'm planning to send it when I'm already ready to say goodbye to this chapter of my life.

Well, I guess love, relationships, and commitment aren't really my thing. So I'm wrapping up my thoughts and emotions through this letter so that I could move on from it already and focus on my priorities and goals.

So this is now the end of the unlabeled love story: Dating app version.

Dear Andrew,

I promised before not to write any goodbye letters anymore, but I guess, promises are just really meant to be broken.

As much as I don't want it to end and I just want to keep holding on to the thought that maybe, there is still a chance, I think it's really better to accept that it's not really going anywhere near the end game that I want and that I should move on already.

I'm not writing this letter to beg you to come back to me, although that's what I wish for. I'm writing this to collect my thoughts and emotions to somehow bid goodbye to them as well so that I could move forward to the next chapter of my life.

To start, I just want to say sorry for the times when I hurt you, both intentionally and unintentionally. I'm sorry for throwing banters and jokes during the times when they weren't that necessary. I'm sorry for doing the same mistakes over and over again even if I knew they were going to hurt you. I'm sorry for the words I didn't mean to say that ended up getting your heart scarred.

I'm sorry for being too insensitive that I didn't care about how you felt, and for being too sensitive that all I cared about was myself. I'm sorry if ever I made you feel not good enough because you are more than enough and any woman would be so lucky to have you. I'm sorry if I had high expectations when all I wanted was consistency.

I'm sorry for being an overthinker that I always had negative things to say. I'm sorry for having trust issues that I always doubted every word you said. I'm sorry for constantly pushing you away and expecting you to stay still and not let go. Surely, it wasn't an effective way to keep a man, and never will.

To be honest, although I was quite doubtful, I was excited when you mentioned that you were saving up to eventually have a trip to the Philippines. I thought it was a perfect opportunity to show you who I really am. I was excited I thought I will be able to show you the amazing beaches here in our place that I call home. I thought I will finally get to introduce someone to my parents.

You didn't know but I actually told my friends about you. They were against it at first because they thought you were too old for me and that you already have a child, which is probably a deal-breaker to them. But when I explained to them that you were a great person and a gentleman, they eventually became supportive. I even told them that they'll get to meet you someday but it's so ironic that it ended even before they got to meet you.

I really thought we were a good match. I thought I already found the one whom I will explore the world with. I thought I already found the one with whom I will go hiking the highest mountains and swimming on the beautiful beaches. I thought I already found the one to watch the sunset with. I thought I already found the man of my dreams whom I will build a life and family with. I thought I already found someone to create dreams and goals with and achieve them together.

Unfortunately, our being a good match didn't transcend through chat. Maybe because at this point in my life, I'm still too immature, toxic, and full of insecurities for a mature man like you. Perhaps, I'm not yet really ready to face the reality of being in a serious relationship because I'm still living in my own fantasy.

Nevertheless, I'm still grateful I got to know you. I admire how you were so honest and straightforward about the things that made you feel hurt. Maybe, you were the lesson that I needed to learn so that I will know how to handle things better when I'll be put in the same situation again.

So thank you for being my happy pill and stress reliever even if I probably only brought stress to you. Thank you for trying to put up with my immaturity and complicatedness. Thank you for the smiles and laughter you gave me. Thank you for taking some time to talk to me even though I know how busy you were.

Thank you for the good things you said to me that made my heart warm and flutter even if I failed to reciprocate them. Thank you for the amazing songs you introduced to me. Surely, they will remind me of you when I get to listen to them.

Even though I only got to know you for a short period, I really think that you are kind, and sweet, and caring, and romantic. I wasn't so generous with compliments but I just want you to know that you are really cute, and handsome, and good-looking.

Know that you deserve nothing but the best in life. So I hope that you will find someone who will be there to cheer you up whenever you feel down, someone who will make you smile and laugh, someone who will take good care of your fragile heart. I hope you will find someone who will push you to be the best version of yourself, someone who will stay by your side and believe that you can do and be more.

Now, do me a favor. While she's not around, please take good care of yourself. Learn to take enough rest whenever you can.

Albeit it was only for a short while, it was so nice meeting you.

Love,

Florie Mae 🥀