Always a Softie

I have always been a Softie. Well, maybe now better than before. Life has taught me a lot and made me braver but it did not change this one part of me–a Softie. Are you someone like me? Or do you perhaps know someone like that? Someone that easily give way under pressure? My kind of person made me believe that no matter how strong we try to act, our soft side will always surface.

Let me explain my definition of being soft: someone that ends up being calm in arguments. I won't say such person is weak rather soft, cool and sometimes a crybaby. They always appear to people as if they are trying to play the victim which is not always true. These kind of people let their emotions get through them and since they can't keep it in, they express how they feel freely and openly, not minding who is present with them. Their voices give way and tears flow.

Well, this is me. I have always been a Softie since I was a child. Tears flow easily from my eyelids at the slightest provocation. I hated harsh words. I couldn't withstand it. I talked back whenever I had the chance to. I try to spill the truth and call a spade a spade which would most likely sound rude which most times is to an elder one and will result into me receiving hot slaps, punishments or undeserving words. I know this is bad. I guess I was wrong. I should have been more respectful.

I can remember growing up as a Softie was not that easy. I got easily tormented or should I call it teased by those I call family. They knew my weak point and they used it against me. It was not funny then but now talking about it made me realize how childish I was. I counted every single thing. I held wrongs of people in my heart which made the tears unstoppable whenever I cried. They would beg me to stop crying but that would only increase the volume.

But I feel better now. I hope all softies out there will feel better too. You don't have to cry on every occasion. People can speak hurtful words to you but they can't control how you feel, only you can do that. Yeah, there are times you just have to let it all out, to breathe but remember you are strong. You are strong lady! You are a strong guy! You are a strong father or mother. You are trying your best. Others might not see it now but keep pushing. You will come out better, you will soon be celebrated.

Do not forget to be a listening ear. We live in a world where everyone is talking. Only few are listening. An attentive listener is appreciated by people. Be someone people can talk to and share ideas with. I won't say I am a great listener but I try as much as possible to be quiet yet active.

I have a cousin that talks a lot. She talks more of herself, and her family. She talks about a lot of things—her experiences with guys, praying even in hard times and a whole lot of things. It was my sister that got to know her first. She said she liked that she is expressive but she talks to much. On knowing her, I held onto my sister's opinion of her much speaking. I gave little attention to whatever she was saying and truly she talks a lot. She doesn't care whether you are listening or not. I disliked her for that. But later, I realised that I was only acting based on what my sister told me. Now, I find her to be an interesting person who is willing to share her mind, plans and of course gists. From here I learnt that we should learn to listen to people and not act rashly based on sentiments.

Also, don't let what people say get to you. Have a high self- esteem. People would always talk. Don't let it affect you only if what they are saying is the truth then you might need to readjust.

Just like when I was in the University, 100 level to be precise. It was in the first semester and I had an exam that money. The school I attended has a dress code which students must abide with. So on that day, I prepared to write my exam and dressed up for school. I wore a v-neck top with a leggings. The v-neck cut was not too much and it was not exposing at all. I checked the mirror before I left for school and it was okay. My mom also saw me before I left. But these dress code officials refused me from entering the exam Hall. They said I had to go home and change. I would have to spend about thirty to forty minutes before I could reach home and another thirty to forty minutes to get back to school. The exam was just for two and a half hours. I didn't know what to do. I tried explaining, begged, did all I could but all to no avail. I became frustrated and I started crying. Serious one ooo😂 to the point that they had to console me. That was how I scaled through and later pardoned. Thank God!

But there was this particular girl that was also caught but acted differently. She didn't see anything bad with what she was wearing. She was just talking anyhow. She stayed longer than I did. She became angry and raised her voice at the officials and they, in return, abused her.

What I am trying to say here is that we would face things like this and what will say matters here. It can affect us. Don't respond angrily. Don't let it get to you.

I hope you enjoyed reading? I did not intend to make this article a story time but they kept on flooding my mind and I thought sharing them wouldn't be that bad. So which are you, a Softie or a Hardie?

Thanks for reading 💖😊