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Well, I don't think self-pity have ever helped anyone niether did it make anyone happy . Although it might only give you a fleeting moment of solace which ofcourse when dwelt in for long would definitely make one fall deeper into the pot of misery.
Just like anger and frustration, it's not bad for one to feel or vent such emotions once in a while. But it's always advisable not to remain stuck. Self pity shouldn't be encouraged just like any other negative emotions.
It's ok to feel bad about what has happened to you at one point or the other in life either by your own making or by the deciet of others. In such a mood, we would be able to reflect upon our previous misdeeds or mistakes and learn the lessons therein. Then move on and be more careful next time.
But perpetuating in such a frame of mind could affect one psychologically and one would always feel inadequate or inferior when they compare themselves to others.
What is worse is that this could degenerate into self hatred and one begins to curse himself at any slightest disapointment or mistake. This would lead to a feeling of demotivation and the fellow would always believe that life is and would always be unfair to him. Sure, they would always have a convincing reason to believe that everyday without realizing that life owes him nothing, it was here before him. Same goes for everyone else.
Self pity always creates this mental image in a person's mind tht they deserve an easy life based on some unpleasant circumstances that they might have passed through. But in reality, that's not how it works. You have to do something to improve your condition, you have to put in the necessary effort.
Although people might empathize with you when they get to hear the story of your abuse but believe me they would definitely get tired of you one day especially when they come to realize that you are deliberately and continually using it as an excuse to court sympathy and seek for favours. Infact they might even begin to hate you.
The truth is, you are not the only one that is has been in a rut, as a matter of fact, some people are still stuck in a rut while others who have been in similar situations like yours but they came out stronger.
So, instead of lamenting and blaming others about your misery, pick yourself up and take little steps on how to improve on your condition. It is the decision that you make tody that would determine how far you would go in life, it absolutely does not matter what you have had to pass through. As long as you still breath, you would always have the opportunity of recreating yourself. Don't be lazy, start building a new life now!