Recognition: seek it or let it come to you?
Here's one of many lifelong questions:
Should one seek to be recognized or should one just let it come on its own?
Hello, my darlings! Another day, another rambling article, hopefully, more organized in thought than the last one. But before I get into it, read this: last night there was another theft in my home, this time was the garbage can. But, unlike before, we found it filled with ceiling titles from another house. Seriously, someone is building a brand new home at the expense of some of us neighbors.
Anyways, to the topic chosen for today, recognition. At work, at home, with our families and loved ones, we strive every day to get a piece of validation for our general efforts in the several areas we might perform. Take musicians, for example; some of us study to be in an orchestra as masters in our particular instruments, some study to be soloists and have long and thriving careers, and some like me, actually don't care where or what we are playing, as long as its good music we don't care if we are the leads or have a secondary role.
However, even though many people can say that we musicians are a little bit narcissistic, the actual truth is that most of us are just happy with people coming to see our concerts and appreciate the work that comes with that, which is both for us and for our audience. The real trouble comes when a small percentage of people, inside the group or out, crave public recognition for their work and turn into really obnoxious people who don't care how they get it, they just have to get it.
Now, is that good or bad??
Well, I'm the kind of person who doesn't care if I get a "Good girl, good job", I like to let my music and my work speak for itself. You won't see me ever seeking to be recognized by anyone because the ones that truly matter will do it without me asking or seeking validation and recognition for a well-performed piece or a well-redacted report. My mom thinks differently, not always, but from time to time, she gets mad at me because she thinks I'm being used and I don't claim the actual credit she thinks I deserve for all my work.
Last night, for instance, she got mad at me and my sister after we told her what had happened with the auditions for the regional orchestra. She started to lash out saying that when will it come the day when we stand up and say enough is enough and get credit for our commitment and sense of belonging, to which I replied: "Mom, everything will get in its rightful place at the right time, I don't care if nobody knows every single thing I do or how well I play, the ones that can give me that recognition, will give it in due time".
I truly believe this, it has been the story of my life, I'm backstage, I'm the dependable one, the one that doesn't crumble under pressure and gets things done without too much fuzz. And some people hate me for that, others respect me enough to consider me an equal. And this morning was a perfect example of that: on Thursday we have a concert and the man in charge of conducting it, has been talking to me before talking to the other members of the staff, and today, in front of everybody, he left me in charge of the final details. Why? Who knows, what I do know is that it wasn't because I desperately sought it, nor did I say to anyone "Hey, here I am and I'm the best of the best". It was due to efficient work and fast response to all the requirements.
Does it make me feel good? Of course it does, who wouldn't! But I repeat, I wasn't searching for it, it came on its own. And that's my point, everything that is done with care, rightfully and with a lot of love, will have its just reward, see just have to be patient and let it flow.
The same happened with my brother, actually the three of them. The one that's in Peru believed that he was going to find the house in pieces, but no, despite the thefts, I have managed to keep the house well attended alongside my mom and Gigi. The one that is in Argentina, was thinking we were starving because of the economic crisis, and the one who's in Caracas thought I was exaggerating my dad's illness until he came and saw it for himself (Argentina did that too before leaving). The three of them in their own time and circumstances realized that we are capable enough to keep it together for ourselves and the family, and we got recognition for our efforts, and we didn't fight, we didn't shout, we just let them see for themselves the reality and that alone spoke louder than a thousand words.
Hey, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that seeking to be recognized and valued is bad or that it isn't important, all I'm saying is that it shouldn't be the primary goal, it shouldn't be the reason you do good things, good deeds, a good job, the principle it should be to always do good no matter what reward might come your way.
That's it, that's enough rambling for today, man we have 38°Celcius of temperature and my brain smells like burned meat!!
See you next time!
April 19th, 2022.
I absolutely get that because it's how I am too. I don't want to be recognized. As long as I do what I can, then so be it. Yes, let actions speak louder than words.