Hello hello my dearests!!

I´m glad to be here after so many weeks of absence. Lack of time is no excuse, we can always find a spot, a small window of time to take care of all of the important things we have going on in our lives, right? Sadly, other things get in the way, and not always we are able to handle them good enough or fast enough, but a sign of strength is not how fast you get back on your feet, is that you make your best effort and do it anyways despite having all the odds against you.

Since April I believe, I haven´t written a single post, long or short, nor here nor on Hive. My brother went back to Peru with his wife and we were left heartbroken because even if I have said harsh things about him and all the things we have gone through, he is my brother and we love him. The first week after his departure was the hardest, so we dug deep into our work and got lost in it: mom´s social media job with the foundation, my sister´s musical shores, and my administrative and management duties were the theme of all days, and for a while that was just fine.

The days kept going, we developed a new routine for our home and our jobs, one that allowed us to do all, to have all, and not miss anything. For me life was good, so good, but tiresome at the same time, I came home every day so tired, physically and emotionally drained, that I didn´t want to do anything, just sleep till the next day or maybe next month. And without even realizing it, my habit of writing here disappeared just like that, I stopped logging in, even to check if my account was still active or not or to answer or leave some comments on the articles of the people I came to know and love over here, nor to follow up with my sponsorships, not anything. 

So what happened?

Maybe depression, I´ve struggled with it for a long time; maybe it was just my illness, being so busy all the time with a body that on its best day is at 70% of energy, its only natural that I get tired easily and want to use my spare time just resting; maybe it was just that I was ashamed that I wasn't doing very well in my latest articles, or that the BCH price dropped so much that I thought that was it for me. But then I realized that even if I started to write because I needed money (and I still do) I found here a sort of release of all the things that make me happy or all the demons that haunt me, and I made the determination to make a comeback, create content, share stories, recipes, anecdotes, many plans that went to the pooper thanks to Covid.

After two years of immunity, my mom and sister got the dreaded virus, and it was bad, not hospital bad, but bad. Mom developed anemia and at the same time her cholesterol levels went sky-high even taking her medication, and my sister's blood pressure dropped to where the devil left his panties.

Three weeks of diet, tests, medication, one step forward two steps back, remembering when my dad was sick and we couldn´t do much and feeling guilty because of it, dealing with my siblings putting more pressure on me than ever before, the frustration of dealing with physicians that are in the business for the money and not because of a calling and a desire of helping and healing people. 

Finally, the fourth-week mom finally started to get better and I started to breathe, as was getting ready to relax and deal with my body collapsing because of all the stress, but no, I started to notice that my sister wasn't as fine as she wanted to convey. She lost more weight, the circles under her eyes darkened, as well as her skin, but cold to the touch. And my worries started to rise again, and I consulted with a doctor who told me that she might have Hipertoroidsm and that I should do a sonogram and some lab work. I did, and all the tests came back clean, but she wasn't getting better, so the same doctor said, let's check her blood sugar, and it was low, at 3 pm it was at 80 when it should have been between 100-140, so she said, check her basal insulin levels. Low again, my worries intensify, as we got our hands on a glucometer and started to check her glucose; on Sunday it went as high as 155, but then dropped to 75 in two hours. After that the highest has been 92, eating right, right hours, balanced, the whole nine yards.

I don't know what's going on, I'm scared, I don't know what to do, my mom looks out for me to solve this but I don´t know how, and as I was about to burst into tears, I remembered read.cash and decided to let it all out over here. 

My title? It is a comeback of some sort, I can't say it for sure, and I can't say that I'll be as active as I was before, I can't say anything for certain, but for now, I'm glad to be here, and a year after I started this journey, I'm glad to be back.

This is 100% Original Content.

The images are from Unsplash and are provided by this site. 

See you next time.

✨✨Blessings✨✨

@rebeysa85

August 17th, 2022.