Never gonna go back to that shape.

June 18, 2022

I just read Ropa's article about her "Payat" days and that takes me back to those times when I was really gone into a waistline size I hated the most. I experienced having a waistline size of 23 at the age of 18 and it kinda makes me a subject for bullies. I was not bullied during my high school days or even teased, because my house is just in front of the school and my family is well known in the area because Gramps was once a barangay captain back in his middle-age years.

But, when I went to college, it was another story for I have no parents to back me up and defend me. But I am not the weakling you think I am. It's just that I am so thin before that I was even teased if my boyfriend do me a lot for I looked like a wreck every time I went to school. Yes, I have a boyfriend at that time, the first one, and he's been ahead of me in years. He was already in the second year when I entered college so all the reference books I got were from him for we are under the same course but different majors. The teasing continued for months but not until the acquaintance party that they learned that I am having my part-time job in the morning and attended school at night. I didn't share it with them so that they'll overthink me being so cozy with the boyfriend when in fact we are not even into that level, lol! A classmate saw me serving and cleaning tables in one restaurant and he confirmed that I am really working part-time.

That was me more than a decade ago, I was only eighteen when as per the date stamp, and my waistline at that time so I was always teased. I hate those arms and those cheekbones for they really made me look like I was not properly cared for.

I didn't mind it at first for I thought that they just love to tease me but it goes overboard when I collapsed during our training. They told the boyfriend to take care of me not just for pleasure but to take care of me healthily too, hahaha I already told them at first that he was not like that but they didn't believe so they received a good long lecture from the boyfriend, dasurrrbbbbbb!.

Me being thin and looking malnourished continued to be a turn-off in my work. People kept telling me to eat more fruits and veggies. I did all that but nothing happens, I even take vitamins but to no avail, I didn't gain weight. I am a picky eater as I don't eat those vegetables I hate but not all of them, I like a few only. But I do love eating fruits.

The disadvantage of being thin was that I can't carry heavy things like I can't lift a water container half my weight(42kgs) and I can't win over an opponent who's bigger than me in a fist fight. I can't also donate blood during some donation runs events that were held sometimes at school. The school nurse would mock me as I can't even have a good supply of blood and really thought of donating, I was also told by her that my weight was not even qualified for I didn't meet the preferred weight as I am underweight

The advantage would be, that I can run a long mile without catching a breath and I can do that for longer times, not that I'm a runner but whenever there's an activity I am always active except for lifting heavy things.

Earlier today, I attended a free medical check-up event held by one of the insurance companies that my Boss joined before. She dragged me to join as it really is a great opportunity to have your check-up for free.

Only then did I find out that my blood pressure was quite alarming as the attending medic told me that I need to work on drinking vitamins for my sake, my weight reached 60kgs and I am really happy knowing that. My waistline also become 28-30 that's also the reason why I am comfortable with my sisters.

What's your payat days/?

I hope you are enjoying it too just as much as I am.

Thank you for reading!
@mommykim