No: 70-06

October 09,2022

Aaaaah , i don't mean to write sad stories for the whole week but what was suddenly occured makes me really sad. For almost a year now i seldom visit my social media account coz i want to keep my inner peace , away from the toxicity of the social media world. And i should say i love the turn out.

I am an introvert , for those who care to know. Being busy in my own world , my time seems not enough. Partly secluded life makes me more comfortable and at peace with my innerself and focus on my family and love ones.

But did i overdo it somehow? I honestly admit i was not able to check on my close friends lately and i do not know what is happening in their lives for quite some time now. This year i feel like i have found peace and fulfillment in this site that it occupied my free time that i am truly guilty that i lost my time with them.

Not that i lost interest to be with them , i only have a small circle and i truly love them all. We don't meet often nor talk regularly but when we do , it's like we have just continue what we have left from our last get together . No adjustments, no sorries, no insecurities. It seems like only yesterday and we would just continue talking and laughing. Catching up from the lost years . That was always our settings. No sulking or resentment towards each other.

Am i too Complacent ?

Just last night , i was bewildered by the message of a close friend, asking if i was able to go to a close friend. I was clueless, i told her i was not into social media for almost a year now and i don't know what's happening lately in the outside world and yes including my friend's life. 😢

Then i was shocked with her news that a husband of our close friend just recently died due to Acute Leukemia. I was horrified and felt truly guilty coz i don't know what's happening around . I don't even check on her for the past months that i felt guilty i was not there to comfort her or give a hand .

I immediately message my friend and said sorry for not being there when she needed me the most. Believe me, i don't really feel good about my being too complacent. I feel sorry for her lost. I know how hard it is for her , for them.

I guess i enjoyed my solitude for too long i forgot to check on my closest friends. They are going through rough roads that i am not aware of . One of my motivation to survive my covid days was my closest friends. I told them i want to grow old and enjoy our senior years with them. Dining out and enjoy the 20% discount when we reach our senior years.

Realization

• I realized that life is really short. And if it's our time to go we can't do anything about it and no one will be ever ready for our demise. So might as well be kind and good while we still have a chance. Make amends, say sorry , say thank you often and appreciate all the things we have, people around us , mostly our love ones and people who stand by us through our ups and down.

• I realized that though i enjoy much my solitude but my close friends are also valuable to me. They are part of my life that i can't live without. I love them and i want to be with them , in sunshine or in shade. I am not just a shadow that would leave them in their darkest. No man is an island as they say , and it's true. I need my friends with me , i want to share my life with them , my journey , my sadness and happiness.

• I realized that LOVE must be shown , not just being said . We must check on our friends from time to time. We won't know if they need us badly unless we ask. An extra effort will go a long way. A simple " Hi and Hello" may give hope and enlighten their day. I must let them feel that i love them by being there when they needed me most.

In conclusion

Ai , as i fondly called her is one of my bestfriend since highschool. Her late husband was a good man , i know how broken my bestfriend for losing him so sudden.

I will pay a visit to her on Wednesday as it's Pareng Ambet's 9th day. May he peacefully rest in our Creator's loving arms.

That's all for tonight. Thank you for the read. May we all have the chances to catch up with our dear friends.

To all my lovely Sponsors " Salamat po ng Marami"!

Lead image from Unsplash and the rest are screenshots from my convo with my friends.

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