Do you know how to forgive?

Forgiveness is something you learn. If you think you can't forgive, it's because you simply don't want to. It’s a very strong feeling and it carries a heavy burden.

Forgiving doesn’t mean that you forget the person and the offense he/she gave you, it’s about turning the page so that you can heal from the pain caused and at the same time you let go of the frustrating feeling of having the pain caused by the offense and the offender. You won’t be able to forget the offense unless you set your mind to it. You must remove yourself from the person who caused you enough pain to hate and if you cannot remove yourself from the person, remove yourself from the memory of the wrong done to you.

Forgetting the offense does not mean that you forget where it came from because that will keep you on your toes about the person in question, but by forgetting you forgive and go on with your life without carrying extra weight.

Sometimes we see that life is like a dream and things go by so fast, the important thing is to let go of the bad times, the bad treatment, the bad people, because they will always exist. To continue living with what you have and to know that events can continue to happen to you that will disturb you and also to have the tools at hand to know how to get out of them, will make your path in some way easier to live.

Learning to forgive is not easy. It’s something you must learn by practicing a lot. This means that you must practice a lot of forgiveness, you can start by detaching from yourself thoughts of self-destruction. Eliminate from your mind negative thoughts of how life treats you badly or why these things happen to you. Negative thoughts bring negative situations into your life.

We often ask ourselves “why is this happening to me?” And that should not be the question, because the same thing happens to millions of people, you just don't know it. Worse things happen to millions of people but you don't know it.

I remember once reading that if you want to know how you are doing, ask others what is their personal situation next to yours. When you listen to the versions of others in relation to your own experience, you immediately realize that your bad experience had less aggravating factors than what other people tell you happened to them.

Don't get locked into that question of “why me?” Because then comes the other question, “why not you?”  Are you not alive? If you are, anything can happen to you.

Don't get caught up in feeling worthless, hated, disqualified or any other negative attitude that is detrimental to your self-improvement. Situations that come our way bring us personal growth, they make us more valuable people and we can even suggest to others how to act in adverse situations, if they ask you to do so. You have the experience and you came out of such a negative thing with flying colors.

If the negative events that happen to you in life do not bring you benefits, it is because you are not using the right tools to get out of them. Everything in life brings a lesson. It’s not worth thinking that our life has been a waste because it does not bring us any happiness or any other benefit.

The past is gone, nothing can bring it back or correct it, so why remember something that we cannot correct? Just to feel miserable? No, I refuse to think about all the negative things that happened in my life because now I have the opportunity to solve my present and I will not waste it, and remembering the negatives makes us feel more frustrated with our life. However, remembering the happy moments that could have happened to us makes our mind produce a release of endorphins and it’s as if we were eating a delicious chocolate. It makes us feel happy and isn't that what we came to this life for? To be happy? The past is part of our life but it cannot dominate who you are now.

Stay in the present as this very word means gift. Keep your gift with joy and enjoy the pleasure of the little things that day by day gives you. Isn't happiness something fleeting? Aren't those little moments that we live and enjoy? Yes, happiness is in everything, it’s in a smile, it’s in a play, it’s in a sunset, in a sunrise. It’s in giving thanks with a smile, it’s in a flower, it’s in a scent and it’s in many simple things.

If you are not willing to live with the small details that bring happiness, if you are not willing to forgive and forgive yourself because you are also very hard on yourself… Then you will bring more dramatic moments into your life, because the negative will bring you to even more negative moments.

Life is just a breath, it’s a breath. In that short time between breaths you can lose your life. You didn’t live a life because you preferred to die in life, waiting for a life with perpetual happiness that is a fallacy, expecting everyone to love you without hurting you is a fallacy. Live with what you have, grow with what you learn, live with the experiences that life gives you, thank God, if you are a believer, for all the things he allows you to go through to polish yourself. Appreciate all the negative aspects of your experiences as an important part of your personal and spiritual formation.

When you see all the good that comes your way when you learn to let go of anger, hatred and unforgiveness you will find another tool to enjoy another small moment of happiness in your life.