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Extended Family

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Written by Β Β 438
1 year ago

Imagine yourself living in a house together with all of your family members or relatives including your parents, siblings, grandparents, inlaws, cousins, uncle or aunts, what a big family right? The more the merrier that's what others said, but is it really merrier?

A family that includes in one household near relatives; an extensive group of people who are related by blood or marriage or who otherwise regards themselves as a large family is what we called Extended Family.

Some people or family practices this kind of family system including my family. Based on my experience living with an extended family, living together is not that happy as you think.

As what I have noticed in living with an extended family it has benefits too.

One of it's primary benefit is that it reduces the family's financial strain. Also it helps in child care support from other adult family members and takes some of the load of the parents.

In an extended family, adults can share their worries, stresses and responsibilities with the other family members forming a close family support structure or bond. Another advantage is companionship because family members can frequently spend time with their loved ones.

Although there's an advantages in living together there's always an opposite side of it, the disadvantages.

I need to share this to you and I can tell why living with extended family is not healthy. Some family members becomes lazy. They tend to exhibit lazy attitudes towards life. They might think that there's someone who's ready to give support, they can sit down and do no work.

This family system can affect negatively in relationships especially on married couples, because there's an open interference in the marriage of the couple.

Other family members can pass comments may it be good or bad behaviours and may sometimes can lead to quarrels. Some may offer ideas about getting a divorce. This may affect negatively a marriage that could otherwise have been successful.

Lastly, leadership can be determined through money, by how deep a person's pocket is.

Some members are influenced by how large amount of money they can get from a certain family member. Therefore the family member who gives more money gains more respect than the natural or to the one who is supposed to be leader of the family.

It's sad but this is reality. I am not against with extended family system. I'm just sharing what I am experiencing living with this family system. I know in God's perfect time we can have our own house too.

Thanks for reading! Don't hesitate to share your reactions and comments below.

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Written by Β Β 438
1 year ago
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Comments

definitely right. Having extended family is very nice and happy though there are lots of disadvantages too. One of them is jealousy that might resulted to insecurities because everyone has a uniqueness that captures relatives attentions then others are ignored but the good thing about it is that I think it'll be easier for everyone to overcome life challenges because his family members are living with him and he can easily ask for help. So, my question to you @eommaZel is, which do you prefer, extended or nuclear family ? 😊

$ 0.02
1 year ago

You got a point dear, and jealousy is the most likely and definitely will develop in this kind of setup. A particular member will feel this negative feelings towards others because he found someone is more prioritized than him. It will trigger laziness too, for some of the members will just depend of the other members, they will not become productive at all.

And to your question my dear, I would rather choose a nuclear family setup. I can say that in that setup, I can give all my attention to my children and my husband. No one is there to tell you that you have to do this or that. You are in control of the house and it is easy to do your works with this setup. It'll be a happier for me, although it is also happy to be with an extended family but the time comes you'll realize how important to have your own house for your own family. Some may think extended family is easy and more of happiness, but the truth is it is not. (based on my experience) 😊 Thanks for joining dear and congrats. ❀️

$ 0.00
1 year ago

If you ask me the same question, I prefer a nuclear family too for I can move confidently when lots of people are at home.haha.

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1 year ago

if given the opportunity I would rather just be independent because for me being in extended family cause a lot of problems as i perceived in my own family i dont know with the others. Such as being lazy because you hope that someone else will do the task for you, costly in everything, noisy especially having many children and various other reasons. If im going to have a family I do not want to have this kind of situation. Thats all dear and here attache the name of my dear friend @Dasefil @Paulmaon and @Jona

$ 0.02
1 year ago

Thanks for joining dear and congrats. ❀️

$ 0.00
1 year ago

thank you for sharing your thoughts about this dear, and you're absolutely right about it. If your in this kind of family tie (extended) some may develop laziness and will be dependent on the other family members. That's just one of the negative side of this extended family. Although, the home will be happier in times of occasions, meal time or gatherings the truth is this family ties is more difficult than we thought it is. I am experiencing this and I can say I want to be free in this kind of set up.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

No one is the same in this world, everyone is different and not everyone has the same mentality. There are some families in this world where many members exist and they feel comfortable in a joint family. They are all mingling and working. Again there are some people who do not feel comfortable in a joint family. They feel comfortable in a single family. For example: a joint family has 10 members. 7 of them feel comfortable in this family and the other 2 do not feel comfortable. If these 2 people do not work well, do violence, quarrel with 6 other people, then peace will be maintained in that joint family? I don't think there will be peace. There are some joint families, if 2 women have 2 children, if another child needs more money for education, the other woman feels jealous! First I say from my own experience: We had our first joint family. We were two brothers and one sister and my uncle had one daughter. We needed more money for education than my cousin. For which my aunt used to feel jealous! Did not have their own freedom. My mother worked a lot but my aunt was lazy. One day my aunt said she would not stay in a joint family, she would form a single family, so she did. Now we are happier than before by the grace of God. Now we are not having the same problem as before. In a single family, I, my sister, younger brother, father, mother are all working and studying in peace and I am very happy.

But I think the problem of single family is to feel lonely. Because the number of family members is low and everyone is busy, the children of single family always feel very lonely and insecure. But it is more so in the city, the effect is not so much in the village because there are many people in the village, as well as other children with whom you can talk at ease. In a joint family, the master is usually centered. Therefore, the decision of everything in the family, big or small, comes in the throw of one master. Therefore, the opinion of the rest is less important here except that one. As the number of family members is high, there is often a lot of quarreling, anger, arrogance, etc. among these members and as a result both the family environment and peace are ruined. In comparison, the social or family responsibilities of joint family members are much higher than those of a single family. On the other hand, single family members, especially children, have a better life, Freedom of decision making and implementation by everyone in the family. Strengthening one's personality and privacy. The younger members of the family feel the touch of improvement in the education system. Economically, it is a great advantage for a single family to be relatively more advanced in terms of money. The lives of the girls in the family are comparatively much improved and the views of the girls are very important in any single family. In fact, it is peaceful and best for those who feel comfortable. However, not everyone has the same mentality. Some feel peace in a single family and some feel peace in a joint family.πŸ™‚ @Sajib, @Cutie_Angel_Mukta, @Rehenuma

$ 0.04
1 year ago

Thanks for sharing your experience with me. I really appreciate that you shared with us your story about this extended family ties. You are right someone want this kind of family (extended) for they can be closer on the family members. But there are disadvantages on this kind of family tie. About the jealousy thing that's right, one may develop a feeling of jealousy once there is a member who is more prioritized than him/her. That person will certainly feel out of place and needs attention. But as you've said we can't control how people will choose what kind of family ties they want to belong. Thank you for joining and Congratulations. ❀️

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1 year ago

Yes exactly. That's I meant. Thank you so much dear again thanks for to give me a winning priority in the first place.😍😍

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1 year ago

Ki likbo ar bujchina, sob e to likhe felchn vai . Amk Kichu boln jdi takhe,Ami aktu likhi.

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1 year ago

πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ€©

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1 year ago

I like extended family because there are many family members and they always enjoy their time and support one another. but i born in a single family

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1 year ago

That's true. Extended families doesn't need to set up reunions all they need to do is to go all together to parks or beaches to enjoy vacations.

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1 year ago

Sometimes some members can be really annoying to bear but the best part of belonging to such an extended family is that they're always there to look out for you when you need them

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1 year ago

Yes indeed, yet it depends on each member's personality. As the saying says "blood is thicker than water" your family will always be your family and they won't leave you behind in times you needed them the most.

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1 year ago

You're definitely right😊

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1 year ago

I like extended family because I was born in extended family where everyone, big or small, encourages me to do anything. I am proud because I was born into such a family.

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1 year ago

Good for you.😊 Im not born in an extended family until I have my own family but when I decided to asked my mother about taking good care of my eldest for a week because I gave birth to my second baby in the hospital but she refused to leave us upto present then everything has change that's how we became extended family. Maybe I'm still not used to it. 😊

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1 year ago

yeah I am so lucky

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Good to hear that πŸ‘

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1 year ago

I don't want to engage with this kind of set up. Because it can lead to unhealthy development. With you build your own family. You must learn how to grow and think about the goods of the family your building up. But if you live in such an environment it could lead you to not care at all because you think there is always someone behind your back. And I also prefer the privacy of my own family. Where I can teach my own child the values that I want them to have. If you are in that setup. Others may intervene. And it can also result in jealousy of something you have and the others don't have.

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1 year ago

That's absolutely right.

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1 year ago

By the way thank you for the upvote. πŸ’—

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1 year ago

Welcome

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1 year ago

it will be very loud but I think it'll be fun too

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1 year ago

Yes it's fun but sometimes privacy is at risk. 😊

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1 year ago

hahaha trueeeeee

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1 year ago