Advantage And Disadvantage

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Written by

Hands-on momma. Still learning, still making mistakes. Bear with it :) ciao!

3 years ago

In community: Filipino Readers(42bb)

Topics: God, Relationships, Marriage

Marriage is not like a hot rice that you can puke when you get scald by it. It is a legally and socially sanctioned union mostly between a man a woman. But I think generation now-a-days doesn't take marriage seriously. But what are some reasons behind a failed marriage?

I remember the story of our Pastor during our seminar for preparation of our marriage. He told us the story of young girl and a boy that married each other at a young age.

There was a girl named Talia who lived next to our pastor's house. They were also member of the church. He witnessed how Talia grew as a woman until marrying a guy who has the same age by her. By the way Talia is just 19 years old when she entered the life of marraige. Our Pastor knew that that marriage will last because he could see the love both in their eyes. But we couldn't really tell it just by looking at them.

One morning, our pastor met Talia on the way to park. He was so happy to see her again. He asked how is their marriage going. Talia slightly bowed her head and smile painfully. Our pastor was confused by her reaction. The only thing that came into his mind was they have a problem. And indeed, after speaking about it, our pastor finally pin point that there was a problem. A big.. big problem.

The pained Talia told him that their marriage didn't worked. The pastor was shookt and asked her why. She just answered "We're too young for marriage. He acts like a teenage guy and everytime he's out with his friends, he forgets that he is a married man.

That sadden our pastor. Uppon hearing what she said, he realized that maybe they're still too young for marriage. The young guy is still not over his teenage self. That's why he's still acting like that. The guy isn't ready for it becaise if so, he should've respect Talia's feelings.

After that encounter with her, our pastor had been so consistent talking with her to make her cope up from their failed marriage.

That story made me scared. A lot of "what if's" entered my mind. What if were too young for marriage? What if we didn't really want this? What if we're just in a hurry? I shookt off the thought.

I noticed our pastor was looking at me. He reassuringly looked at me and smiled.

"I'm not saying this to you to make you feel worried. I'm saying this because I want the two of you to learn from this."

"Look, being married at a young a age is not a problem. The problem is that they can't both handle the pressure of being married. Actually, not the pressure. But the obligations of being a married man and a woman."

That made me think that our pastor was right. It depend on us, on how we'll handle our relationship, our married life.

It's true, there are advantage of being married at young age. They will be able to test the real adult life at a young age. They will know what is needed from what is not. They will learn to appreciate things they bought together.

There are also a lot of disadvantage like, tendency to make compromises, lack of understanding, financial security issues, etc.

But that still depend on the both of them. They can be married at a young age without encountering such problems. The only key to a succesful marriage is understanding, patience, commitment, love and most especially, let God be the center of your marriage. Because a marriage that has Him will last a long time.

In some fairytale, when the lead male marry the lead female, it's a happy ending already. But life doesn't go with that. For me, being married is just the beginning of the story where you can encounter a lot of sufferings, struggles and arguing. It is just up to us. When we know how to handle each other then surely it will be a successful marriage.

Actually there should be no disadvantage on marriage. Because disadvantage on marriage is just something that we can't just do on ourselves. Lack of understanding? Then be matured enough. It's not that hard to understand the person you truelly love. Financial security issues? Then go find work. Support each other. In every problem, there is a solution. Don't be a hindrance to your own succesful marriage.