Do you have insecurities in life? in your body? How does it affect you? What did you do to overcome those insecurities?
Good day folks. This day is a wistful day for me. When I woke up this morning, I suddenly had this melancholic mood. I don't understand why I had this feeling today. But I tried to ignore it. I worked my daily routine like taking care of my daughter, and do some household chores. When afternoon came, my daughter took her nap. I decided to write an article but nothing really came up my mind. So, I decided to take a bath to freshen up my mind. After taking my bath and changing clothes, I look up my reflection at the mirror. I stared myself and ask silently. How you doin self? What makes you lonely? I stood in front of the mirror for a couple of minutes. I looked at my face and my body. Then I realized that I already forgotten to take care of my body. Insecurities hit me. Some parts of my body that I used to be taken care of was been neglected.
Body insecurities is not easy to deal with. According to Jodi Jaspan, a therapist, insecurities are related to standards set by the people we interact with, such as our family, friends, and peers, and societal expectations that may be legitimate or perceived. Insecurity is a product of comparing ourselves to others. We tend to comply other people's standard. Maybe this is what happens to me now. I always minding what other people might say to my body.
My body insecurities because of motherhood.
Before I became a mother, I used to shape my eyebrows. Since I have a thick, messy eyebrows, I plucked it every once a week. But now, I forgot to take care of myself. The tiny hair above my lips became more visible. My face and skin became dry. Oftentimes, I forgot to apply lotions to moisturized my skin because I always prioritize the needs of my daughter. Motherhood really hits me hard that I fail to remember that I also have to take care of myself. I often go outside because I'm not confident of myself anymore. If there's a chance that I have to buy something in the store, I will cover my body. Good thing that we are required to wear mask this days. It helped me cover the insecurities in my face. But everytime I go outside, I cover my body with a towel to hide my fats in my belly ( bilbil sa tiyan ). I also have many stretch marks on my waist and in my thighs.
The worst insecurity that I have right now is my oxster. My oxster haven't recovered from my pregnancy. It became so dark. Before I got pregnant, my underarm was not so dark. I can wear sleeveless dresses and feel comfortable and confident with myself. But now, after I gave birth, I can't wear sleeveless dresses outside the house anymore. Every time I see my underarm on the mirror I feel so frustrated. I already watched videos on YouTube tutorials on how to whitens the underarm area. I only managed to follow the remedies that can be found at home. But nothing happened. There are other products they advised but I can't afford to buy those. I need to prioritize my child's needs first especially now that I have no job and we are only depending on my partners' mother.
CLOSING NOTE
Maybe it's time for me to accept the changes in my body. Time to embrace my flaws because it is part of my journey of motherhood. I know it is not easy but I will try my best to accept this changes in my body. I think I need more time to recover in this motherhood stage. I remember what Kisses Delavin said, being beautiful is knowing that you are imperfect.
Pasensiya na po kayo kung hindi maganda ang gawa ko ngayon. Wala talaga ako sa mood magsulat pero nasasayangan po kasi ako sa time. Dalawang araw na din kasi itong nakatingga sa draft ko kaya pinablish ko na lang. Pasensiya na po ulit. Sana hindi nyo ako ijudge sa shinare ko.
PASASALAMAT CORNER
A big and unending thanks to all of you who keep on supporting me. Thank you for your generosity. I hope I won't disappoint you guys. God speed all of you.
You don't have to feel bad. Giving birth to a child is a blessing, so everything that comes after it is secondary. Beauty is carried on the inside, not the outside.