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A childfree-Happily ever after

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Written by   286
6 months ago

My friend told me some time ago that she doesn’t want to have children. Her decision was final and has been growing since her childhood. As a teenager, she had to take care of her younger sister when their mother became seriously ill, and her father "took refuge" in constant work. At that time, she became a "surrogate mother" when she was too young, and today, as an adult woman, she only wants freedom and independence for herself, she explained.

My friend Kim is far from the only one. Despite the majority (and erroneous belief) that every woman still wants to become a mother. More and more of them are consciously deciding not to have children.

Their reasons are different. Some come from childhood, others do not want to give birth to a child in an uncertain world of global climate change, environmental challenges, economic crises and current pandemics. The third attracts independence, freedom, travel, the fourth builds a successful career, the fifth never really felt the "maternal instinct" ...

And no, they don't necessarily like children. They may adore them, they just don't want their own.

I read in magazines that just during the covida-19 pandemic, even more women and even couples decided not to become parents due to growing uncertainty.

It is now easier and more unreserved for them to speak in public, as society today understands and accepts them more than it used to. Yes, in ancient history, childless women were often persecuted, convicted, even murdered. In the Middle Ages, a woman without children (though for infertility, not even of her choice) was generally persecuted for witchcraft and association with the devil, and in ancient Rome, a husband could separate from his wife because she did not bear him a child. He discarded her and kicked her out of the home, and then church dignitaries tried to “cure” her.

And no, women who choose to be childless are not selfish. Just like in 2015, Pope Francis preached in his address to the faithful. "The decision not to have children is selfish. Life is rejuvenated and gains new energy through reproduction, enrichment and not impoverishment," he announced.

American pop singer Miley Cyrus is one of the celebrities who has publicly said they don’t dream of motherhood. She revealed to Elle magazine that she will not have children due to climate change. Until I can give birth to a baby in a world where fish will swim in the sea, I don’t want to be a mom, she said. Actress Cameron Diaz admitted to Esquire that she did not want such responsibility. "Life is easier because I don't have children. But that doesn't mean I made the decision easily," she stressed.

Actresses Helen Mirren, Renée Zellweger, Jennifer Aniston and presenter Oprah Winfrey are also without growth. Croatian singer and musician Ivana Kindl is also among them. "I adore children and children adore me. I thought about it a lot and in the end I decided not to have children. You just know that," she said in an interview with Slobodna Dalmacija.

By the 1960s, Europeans had already changed their minds about families - postponing marriage and parenthood, more women without children, more frequent divorces and more common extramarital affairs.

The world has become more friendly to people who wanted to live on their own and who crossed the boundaries of ancient norms.

Women who consciously choose to never be mothers are often the targets of smarts in the sense of “oh, that’s what every woman wants,” “motherhood is a natural given,” “you’ll change your mind,” “since you’re still young, you’ll see , when your biological clock starts ticking "," you will regret when you get older "...

In reality, however, you should hear “it’s just your decision,” “you’re not obligated to explain or explain anything to anyone,” “I respect and accept your decision”. Because the decision is hers and not yours. But who are you to be able to judge her and - even worse - condemn her?

Thank you for reading my article.

Greetings from @Teji

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Written by   286
6 months ago
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Comments

Everyone has the right to their decision and life!

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6 months ago

Birth is an important part of life, if not the most important, still few people focus on understanding it. Kids born in hospitals are not even treated as humans anymore these days. They wear masks, they get injected toxins and get chipped like any other animal. Why would one want to give birth to a world like that? Just to make the family proud? First that family must understand how to respect the miracle of life before it can expect anything to flourish. There are ways to get free children still, but that place is outside of the comfort zone of many.

I find it very natural that humans who are being mistreated so badly do not want to have children anymore. Many enslaved animals that are living under horrible conditions do not breed themselves. It is the natural instinct to avoid the abuse of that child that would take place if it was born. Still I believe that birth is natural and important for survival, because if we do not have any family, we rely heavily on the government, so maybe it might be best to change the conditions and find a place where it makes sense to have a child.

Maybe that woman has many friends that act like a family. Maybe that woman already has a lot of contact with children. Maybe a woman that does not want to continue on her natural survival strategy, has an issue to solve and is busy doing that. Maybe that woman just accepts that the government takes over that role of family. Maybe that woman really knows how to survive on her own and does not need any government. Maybe that woman simply prefers the government as family because it made bad experience with her own family. Maybe she was born into that government family and for her it is the normal.

There are so many ways it makes sense not to have children, still I believe that it is so important for survival of the spirit. If there is nobody to pass on that spirit to, it will disappear. But yes there are many ways to pass on that spirit if other childrends are allowed to observe & talk with strangers (there is that issue that children are perceived as property in many cultures), it must not live on in that own child, it can live on in any child.

It is really a tough decision to have a child, if not one of the toughest decisions of life. It should definitely not be subject to any debate, each individual has to make their own choice and the rest must accept that.

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6 months ago

everyone has the right to decide what they think is best for them.

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6 months ago

I always believe in following your heart and your happiness. We have our own will and we have the right to choose and decide what do we want or what's the best for us. And although we have our own judgment it wouldn't really matter if that's not our life. Your life your rules.

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6 months ago

Thank you for tip!

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6 months ago

I think it's better for women who don't want to have children not to be pressured into having them. Children need mothers (and fathers) who are happy to have them and happy to devote their time to them and love them unconditionally. And it's not like today's society is facing an issue in childbirth rate, at least in most countries.

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6 months ago

Very interesting article

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6 months ago

thank you

$ 0.00
6 months ago

Nice

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6 months ago

thank you

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6 months ago

every person have right to decide how wish to manage his life, and i support everyone if his choice if this choice not disturb others

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6 months ago

right

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6 months ago

Interesting article

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6 months ago

I like this article

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6 months ago

thank you

$ 0.00
6 months ago

You wrote nicely

$ 0.00
6 months ago

Thank you

$ 0.00
6 months ago

You are welcome

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6 months ago

I think it is one of life's decisions that no one has the right to interfere with. My husband and I wanted children, I gave birth to both daughters in the nineties, at a very difficult time, but that was our choice. Now we leave it to our daughters to make their own decisions. We can say an opinion if asked, but everyone has their own life to decide.

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6 months ago

Thank you for the tip!

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6 months ago

yes i agree with you

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6 months ago

So good writing as usual dear.

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6 months ago

thank you

$ 0.00
6 months ago

Nice

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6 months ago

thank you

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6 months ago

I think you should have a child so when you grow old you have some company.

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6 months ago

i didnt write about me

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6 months ago

I know :D

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6 months ago

But every person can not do.

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6 months ago

Yeah, sadly

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6 months ago