My friend told me some time ago that she doesn’t want to have children. Her decision was final and has been growing since her childhood. As a teenager, she had to take care of her younger sister when their mother became seriously ill, and her father "took refuge" in constant work. At that time, she became a "surrogate mother" when she was too young, and today, as an adult woman, she only wants freedom and independence for herself, she explained.
My friend Kim is far from the only one. Despite the majority (and erroneous belief) that every woman still wants to become a mother. More and more of them are consciously deciding not to have children.
Their reasons are different. Some come from childhood, others do not want to give birth to a child in an uncertain world of global climate change, environmental challenges, economic crises and current pandemics. The third attracts independence, freedom, travel, the fourth builds a successful career, the fifth never really felt the "maternal instinct" ...
And no, they don't necessarily like children. They may adore them, they just don't want their own.
I read in magazines that just during the covida-19 pandemic, even more women and even couples decided not to become parents due to growing uncertainty.
It is now easier and more unreserved for them to speak in public, as society today understands and accepts them more than it used to. Yes, in ancient history, childless women were often persecuted, convicted, even murdered. In the Middle Ages, a woman without children (though for infertility, not even of her choice) was generally persecuted for witchcraft and association with the devil, and in ancient Rome, a husband could separate from his wife because she did not bear him a child. He discarded her and kicked her out of the home, and then church dignitaries tried to “cure” her.
And no, women who choose to be childless are not selfish. Just like in 2015, Pope Francis preached in his address to the faithful. "The decision not to have children is selfish. Life is rejuvenated and gains new energy through reproduction, enrichment and not impoverishment," he announced.
American pop singer Miley Cyrus is one of the celebrities who has publicly said they don’t dream of motherhood. She revealed to Elle magazine that she will not have children due to climate change. Until I can give birth to a baby in a world where fish will swim in the sea, I don’t want to be a mom, she said. Actress Cameron Diaz admitted to Esquire that she did not want such responsibility. "Life is easier because I don't have children. But that doesn't mean I made the decision easily," she stressed.
Actresses Helen Mirren, Renée Zellweger, Jennifer Aniston and presenter Oprah Winfrey are also without growth. Croatian singer and musician Ivana Kindl is also among them. "I adore children and children adore me. I thought about it a lot and in the end I decided not to have children. You just know that," she said in an interview with Slobodna Dalmacija.
By the 1960s, Europeans had already changed their minds about families - postponing marriage and parenthood, more women without children, more frequent divorces and more common extramarital affairs.
The world has become more friendly to people who wanted to live on their own and who crossed the boundaries of ancient norms.
Women who consciously choose to never be mothers are often the targets of smarts in the sense of “oh, that’s what every woman wants,” “motherhood is a natural given,” “you’ll change your mind,” “since you’re still young, you’ll see , when your biological clock starts ticking "," you will regret when you get older "...
In reality, however, you should hear “it’s just your decision,” “you’re not obligated to explain or explain anything to anyone,” “I respect and accept your decision”. Because the decision is hers and not yours. But who are you to be able to judge her and - even worse - condemn her?
Thank you for reading my article.
Greetings from @Teji
Everyone has the right to their decision and life!