Why i'm cold?

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Written by
4 years ago
In community: Mind Expression(b14e)

Hey,

These past few days was rough for me since, i was having my episodes on bipolar depression. I was very anxious to talk to people, that's why they see me as a cold person. They were apparently avoiding me, just small talks, including my family. I was on a very rough situation since i needed someone who i can talk to but, also i was afraid because they will see me as a burden since all i can talk about is my situation. I just needed someone who can break my barrier, who really just want to see me as a person, not just a human substitute. I know also my short comings since, i rarely open up or talk to people because i have trust issues. But its hard for a person, who was traumatized about being left by someone who was to be on your side. It was very hard to really open up, because people might just want to use you. All i know is that i was all alone, no one cared for me because i'm just a stuck up bitch. No one is really there for me at all. That's why i'm closing myself to everyone.

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Avatar for QuertTheExplorer
Written by
4 years ago
In community: Mind Expression(b14e)

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User's avatar QuertTheExplorer
4 years ago

I've been there. i felt that when i was younger. thought i was all alone and that no one really cared. I used to rebel. i thought no one really understand me and appreciated me. and that was I THOUGHT. it was only in my mind. i was selfish. I was the ONE that never really understand them and didn't appreciate the things they are doing for me. i was the one that didn't noticed they cared, loved and there for me. i was too blinded because i was only thinking about myself, my feelings. so i guess my advice for you my dear, please open up your eyes. you are not alone, never was. open up your heart to your family, your close friend. you have to appreciate the things they do for you. you are blinded by fear i think. and remember God is always with you so you are not alone. I hope you are ok. Just pray and He will surely take away whatever fear and pain you feel. God bless you my dear.

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User's avatar dhona019
4 years ago

You need to get your ass out and talk to me about that if you want. I mean, here, you can mention me in comments. I am willing to listen to your rants. I kind of think we are on the same boat. I have that attitude too, where my family and friends couldn't talk to me because my mood was in a volcanic-eruption-like sometimes. I hate myself too for having that personality, but I couldn't fight it. Even if I want to talk to them, I end up being irritated by just too little things. I feel you, I really do, so you can talk to me. You can open up. You can consider me as your rant-buddy. I'm welcoming you with my arms wide open. 🙃

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User's avatar charmingcherry08
4 years ago

It's good to build a barrier around yourself to avoid getting fooled. The more you let people in to your life, the more you will get hurt. Enjoy the company of yourself until the person who truly deserves your warm side comes.

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User's avatar Kiro
4 years ago
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