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Who is an introvert just like me? What qualities do they have? Let me list some of them before I continue my interesting article. Trust me, you will find it fun.
An introvert is shy.
An introvert loves to be alone.
An introvert do not find fun in socializing.
An introvert is gentle and keep things to themselves.
They are silent, calm, passive, rigid, reserved, reliable and quiet.
Now, let's talk about their worries and how anxious they may be. I was opportuned to stumble on an article about the six worries of an anxious introvert and going through all, I could see it was pointing at me because I would be explaining with my experiences to understand this points. You can disagree with me if you think they doesn't point at you too because whether you agree or not, these worries are found in all introverts.
An introvert getting ready to socialize, mingle or associate with people, you will see they find it difficult to do unlike the extroversion type of people who finds it easy because they are used to it. So, should we start?
In a scenario where I am being invited to somewhere or to talk to people, instead of being positive how it would turn out but I am trying to be pessimistic and would start thinking of the worst case scenario, how it will go bad at the end. Introverts look less at themselves and with this, they believe if they should attend a meeting or gathering, they will be shun at or disappointed by people.
This has always happened to me on many occasions. I don't feel comfortable when I am invited or trying to go to a venue I have never been before. Of course, every introverts would be worried especially thinking People would look at them and talk about them and they think they are been disgraced or humiliated. When it's my first time visiting a particular place, I'd rather go in the company of someone or two people to make me feel comfortable.
Many times when I am walking alone, I would just focus on the ground especially when passing in the midst of people. I won't be comfortable until I pass through them. I can even pick up my nails and start biting or concentrating on something I shouldn't have with my body, clothes, hair etc until I get out of that place. It's always uncomfortable for me unless I have people I walk with then.
When you invite me somewhere, I prefer going there early so that I would have sat down before other people comes in. Unlike when I attend a gathering late when others have arrived, I would instead sit at the back to avoid People gazing at me while entering to sit in the front. I hate it when I walk in the midst of people and all attention is on me, it feels like the ground should open and swallow me up. I feel embarassed (let me use the word).
So, an introvert would rather want to go early than being late and become centre of attention.
This is another worry of an introvert. This is why I said I am comfortable walking in the company of two or more people to keep me good. Going for a social event, an introvert would ask if another person is going so he or she can find someone they can walk with and when the offer is turned down or the other person isn't going, they feel worried and likely change their mind of going.
Another example is going for an event where you do not know anyone there. You are new and it seems no one cares, how do you feel? You rather change your mind instantly if you ever noticed you do not know anyone and it's difficult to make friends there because of who you are-an introvert who is shy
An introvert needs someone who he or she can lean on, talk to and create that "woohoo" "ermm" conversation with, so standing alone in a social event will definitely cause anxiety.
Just like I said that introverts would prefer going to an event early to avoid all eyes on him or her. Getting to the event at just the right time is decisive to your introvert comfortability factor.
The author of this article talked about her experience too that whenever she goes to an event early and no one has arrived, she would sit in her car and await others and when she sees people entering, she quickly walks in their midst into the event as this would make her feel comfortable without anyone looking at her.
Let me make mine too. Whenever I go to church, and they call those who are paying their tithes or coming out to drop offering, I will have to wait for people to stand up and then walk in between them to the altar and do the same while going back to my seat. I feel nervous walking alone😣
How do you feel when you invite someone as a guest speaker and didn't show up, sad right? Same thing with someone inviting you to attend his or her party and made you the important guest of the day and while at home, your mind is racing if you should go or not. The truth is no one knows if you are there or not, everyone minds their business and it's your mind rationalizing. So face it and do not make such person feel bad that you didn't turn up.