5 Foundations Of A Healthy Relationship

Sometimes a relationship can feel so poor and you can't pinpoint its origin. We've all been in the difficult position of figuring out how to determine if we're in a healthy relationship and what we can do to fix it before we're ready to take the next step and break up. A solid foundation is the key to a good relationship. Without a clear understanding of how to build a flourishing, sustainable, and balanced relationship, you may feel afraid to venture into difficult conversations, scared of what might happen to the relationship.

This article is about the foundation for a good relationship. It starts with understanding the origins of the fear, that may be holding you back. The goal is to make sure your and your partner's feelings are always taken into consideration.

Trust

Trust is a key part of a healthy relationship. When trust is broken, communication becomes difficult and it's difficult to make decisions. When you don't trust someone, it's very easy to assume the worst about them. This causes conflict and can ultimately destroy the relationship.

Trust is built by consistently doing things, that you have agreed upon. These agreements can be things you have spoken about before or they can be implied things, that you both know. Having trust means, that you have faith, that your partner will do the same thing, regardless of the situation.

Common agreements include kindness, honesty, and willingness to compromise. If one of you always has to win or be right, then you will not build trust in the relationship. Compromising is important, because it shows, that you are willing to work with your partner instead of trying to beat them down.

Trust can also be built by being careful about what you reveal about yourself. This can be in the form of information, thoughts, feelings or desires. It is OK to have some trust and then also have some intimacy, but if you have no trust, then there will be no relationship.

Something that you should know about trust is that it can't always be fixed. Sometimes you can build more over time, but sometimes it's gone forever. Even if you no longer have a relationship with someone you still trust, you should still maintain some respect for them. In turn, they may have some respect for you as well.

Communication

Conflict is part of any relationship, but how you approach the conflict and how much communication you actually do is what makes the difference between a professionally friendly relationship and one, that is constantly at each other's throats. Effective communication is crucial and it can only happen if you respect each other enough to tell the truth and have an open mind when it comes to ideas.

If you feel comfortable enough, be completely up front and tell your partner everything. This may not always be possible, but in these cases it's OK to withhold information. It's OK to avoid the question and change the subject. Sometimes information, that your partner doesn't need to know should be kept from them.

You can't build a relationship on lies, so having an open mind to new ideas and not automatically dismissing them is important. It's OK to ask questions, consider the evidence, and change your mind about something. Don't forget though, that you may be wrong sometimes. Your partner isn't obligated to agree with everything you say or do.

When you are having a conversation, avoid attacking your partner personally. Even if they are wrong or being unreasonable, don't take it out on them. Your goal is to work it out with them, not drive them away. Try to find the common ground and areas of compromise. The best way to do this is by asking questions and listening to them. If you're not interested in what they have to say, just tell them so.

Respect

Respect is not necessarily what you have for someone, because of something they have done. Respect is how you feel about them regardless of anything. Respect is a feeling and it's how you are able to work with someone despite personality differences. It's knowing, that you will put up with their faults along with the good.

Respect is earned through actions and shown through your words. It's important, that you show your partner, that you respect them in a multitude of ways, such as manners, thoughtfulness, helpfulness, etc. The way you handle disagreements is very important. If they see, that you are disrespectful in these situations, then how can they respect you?

Respect is not just one way and it can't be forced. It's OK to disagree with your partner and point out their flaws when necessary. Never belittle them though, even in a joking manner. Remember though, that even if they are worth respecting on some level, they may not deserve your complete respect.

Respect is a two way street and the only way it can exist is if you really put forth an effort to think about it and understand.

Honesty

Honesty is probably one of the most important traits in a relationship. Honesty is telling the truth and being honest. It doesn't matter if you are being honest to lie, but lying is still not OK. It's important in a relationship, that you can tell when your partner is lying. Lying implies a certain degree of dishonesty within the person and they may not be able to be trusted in general. This is not to say, that you can't trust them, it just means you cannot fully trust them.

The best way to handle lying in a relationship is to not lie. This may seem easy to say and not so easy to do. There are many situations in which it is appropriate to lie, such as a job or when dealing with people you don't know. No matter what the situation, it is important to think about how you would respond, if your partner was lying to you. It would be best to not respond at all, but if you were to do so, you should respond with a question. This way they would have to give an honest answer and not be able to lie about it.

The best way to deal with lying in a relationship is to always tell the truth. This may seem like it can damage a relationship, but the reality is if you are always telling the truth, then you know where you stand with your partner. If they are capable of being honest with you, then the relationship is strong enough to withstand it. Telling the truth also shows respect, because your partner will have more of an opportunity to do so as well.

Forgiveness

There will be times, when your partner may do something that you really don't like. You may even get mad at them, but that doesn't mean you have to hold on to the anger you have. It's OK to forgive. Even if something is unforgivable, it doesn't mean you can't still be friends with your partner.

Forgiving someone means, that you realize, that they are not always going to act the way you want them to. Sometimes people are just going to be selfish and do things, that aren't in your best interest. This doesn't mean, that the relationship is going to fall apart and you'll always have to put up with it. There are ways in which you can deal with these people in a respectful manner.

Sometimes you'll get angry at something your partner does and it's perfectly natural. Sometimes you're going to be mad at them even if it seems like they made a small mistake. Don't hold on to that anger though, if you can, somehow let it go. Never try to intentionally make them feel bad about something, that they have done. This is called emotional abuse and it's a big no-no.