5 Foundations Of A Healthy Relationship

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Avatar for Peter-Molnar
3 years ago
Topics: Life, Relationship

Sometimes a relationship can feel so poor and you can't pinpoint its origin. We've all been in the difficult position of figuring out how to determine if we're in a healthy relationship and what we can do to fix it before we're ready to take the next step and break up. A solid foundation is the key to a good relationship. Without a clear understanding of how to build a flourishing, sustainable, and balanced relationship, you may feel afraid to venture into difficult conversations, scared of what might happen to the relationship.

This article is about the foundation for a good relationship. It starts with understanding the origins of the fear, that may be holding you back. The goal is to make sure your and your partner's feelings are always taken into consideration.

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Trust

Trust is a key part of a healthy relationship. When trust is broken, communication becomes difficult and it's difficult to make decisions. When you don't trust someone, it's very easy to assume the worst about them. This causes conflict and can ultimately destroy the relationship.

Trust is built by consistently doing things, that you have agreed upon. These agreements can be things you have spoken about before or they can be implied things, that you both know. Having trust means, that you have faith, that your partner will do the same thing, regardless of the situation.

Common agreements include kindness, honesty, and willingness to compromise. If one of you always has to win or be right, then you will not build trust in the relationship. Compromising is important, because it shows, that you are willing to work with your partner instead of trying to beat them down.

Trust can also be built by being careful about what you reveal about yourself. This can be in the form of information, thoughts, feelings or desires. It is OK to have some trust and then also have some intimacy, but if you have no trust, then there will be no relationship.

Something that you should know about trust is that it can't always be fixed. Sometimes you can build more over time, but sometimes it's gone forever. Even if you no longer have a relationship with someone you still trust, you should still maintain some respect for them. In turn, they may have some respect for you as well.

Communication

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Conflict is part of any relationship, but how you approach the conflict and how much communication you actually do is what makes the difference between a professionally friendly relationship and one, that is constantly at each other's throats. Effective communication is crucial and it can only happen if you respect each other enough to tell the truth and have an open mind when it comes to ideas.

If you feel comfortable enough, be completely up front and tell your partner everything. This may not always be possible, but in these cases it's OK to withhold information. It's OK to avoid the question and change the subject. Sometimes information, that your partner doesn't need to know should be kept from them.

You can't build a relationship on lies, so having an open mind to new ideas and not automatically dismissing them is important. It's OK to ask questions, consider the evidence, and change your mind about something. Don't forget though, that you may be wrong sometimes. Your partner isn't obligated to agree with everything you say or do.

When you are having a conversation, avoid attacking your partner personally. Even if they are wrong or being unreasonable, don't take it out on them. Your goal is to work it out with them, not drive them away. Try to find the common ground and areas of compromise. The best way to do this is by asking questions and listening to them. If you're not interested in what they have to say, just tell them so.

Respect

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Respect is not necessarily what you have for someone, because of something they have done. Respect is how you feel about them regardless of anything. Respect is a feeling and it's how you are able to work with someone despite personality differences. It's knowing, that you will put up with their faults along with the good.

Respect is earned through actions and shown through your words. It's important, that you show your partner, that you respect them in a multitude of ways, such as manners, thoughtfulness, helpfulness, etc. The way you handle disagreements is very important. If they see, that you are disrespectful in these situations, then how can they respect you?

Respect is not just one way and it can't be forced. It's OK to disagree with your partner and point out their flaws when necessary. Never belittle them though, even in a joking manner. Remember though, that even if they are worth respecting on some level, they may not deserve your complete respect.

Respect is a two way street and the only way it can exist is if you really put forth an effort to think about it and understand.

Honesty

Honesty is probably one of the most important traits in a relationship. Honesty is telling the truth and being honest. It doesn't matter if you are being honest to lie, but lying is still not OK. It's important in a relationship, that you can tell when your partner is lying. Lying implies a certain degree of dishonesty within the person and they may not be able to be trusted in general. This is not to say, that you can't trust them, it just means you cannot fully trust them.

The best way to handle lying in a relationship is to not lie. This may seem easy to say and not so easy to do. There are many situations in which it is appropriate to lie, such as a job or when dealing with people you don't know. No matter what the situation, it is important to think about how you would respond, if your partner was lying to you. It would be best to not respond at all, but if you were to do so, you should respond with a question. This way they would have to give an honest answer and not be able to lie about it.

The best way to deal with lying in a relationship is to always tell the truth. This may seem like it can damage a relationship, but the reality is if you are always telling the truth, then you know where you stand with your partner. If they are capable of being honest with you, then the relationship is strong enough to withstand it. Telling the truth also shows respect, because your partner will have more of an opportunity to do so as well.

Forgiveness

There will be times, when your partner may do something that you really don't like. You may even get mad at them, but that doesn't mean you have to hold on to the anger you have. It's OK to forgive. Even if something is unforgivable, it doesn't mean you can't still be friends with your partner.

Forgiving someone means, that you realize, that they are not always going to act the way you want them to. Sometimes people are just going to be selfish and do things, that aren't in your best interest. This doesn't mean, that the relationship is going to fall apart and you'll always have to put up with it. There are ways in which you can deal with these people in a respectful manner.

Sometimes you'll get angry at something your partner does and it's perfectly natural. Sometimes you're going to be mad at them even if it seems like they made a small mistake. Don't hold on to that anger though, if you can, somehow let it go. Never try to intentionally make them feel bad about something, that they have done. This is called emotional abuse and it's a big no-no.

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3 years ago
Topics: Life, Relationship

Comments

In my opinion , these qualities are necessary and important not only for building a strong family . But also for communicating with other people. And maybe then the world will be better .

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3 years ago

The things you have mentioned above are really the most needed in a strong and well founded relationship. Thanks for this. We should learn how to listen to them and not just ourselves 🤗

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3 years ago

A lot of people want to be or already in a relationship and they don't know why it is not working out for them. Once you are in a relationship you have to maintain it to last long.

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3 years ago

Trust and Communication, that's the thing that really need in a relationship above all. If you don't have trust, then your relationship would just be fall into destruction it can become so ugly to the point if destroying each other, same woth communication 💙

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3 years ago

I agree. Well said Ruffa.

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3 years ago

All of this are really important to have a good relationship. Trust must be there always and don't dare to broke because once it broken the relationship is not healthy anymore.

This is the main source on having a good relationship with our partners. To become totally build which stays longer and stronger..❤️

Thank you for this Peter.. God bless you.🙏😇

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3 years ago

Yes once trust is broken you cannot trust in the peson anymore. Not fully anyway.

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3 years ago

totally agree with these... i calls it 5 ingredients of a good relationship. trust and respect should go hand in hand and because not all people have all those ingredients one or the other should fill up for the missing ingredients though this can cause weariness if the other side will not improve itself.

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3 years ago

That would have been a really good title for this article. :)

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3 years ago

Communication and trust are very important in a relationship. If you fight, you can talk, but don't lose communication when you're upset, because that's when the break up starts. 

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3 years ago

Fights must be talked through after calming down. Yes very important and also to close that fight and not mentioning or blaming the other weeks or months later.

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3 years ago

This you name are the pillars of a good relationship if this is the same in both people it is a perfect relationship that every friendship wishes

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3 years ago

Yes these can be applied to other relationships too.

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3 years ago

No matter what happen, on how big your fight is. What we only need to do is to forgive rachel others accept everyone's mistake.. it's always the communication a and trust that will make the relationship stronger, also the loyalty. Well all in all if we love our. Partners we must show them how much we do. Appreciate their efforts and show your love

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3 years ago

Communication is important too. We don't want to just live next to each other we want to live together.

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3 years ago

All the qualities and virtues you mention are so important in a relationship, but if the person as an individual possesses them, any relationship he/she starts will be good, of course he/she would have to get another person with the same qualities.

It is difficult but not impossible.

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3 years ago

Yes that's true.

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3 years ago

I totally agree with you

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3 years ago

😉

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3 years ago

Oh I watched a video about psychology facts that the relationship is healthy and true if a man kisses a lady on the forehead rather than in lips, kissing a lady on his forehead means genuine love in which the man truly loves a woman specially is he kissed the girl he loved in forehead privately. While if the man kisses the lady on lips always, there's a possibility that it's not love but pure lust. Just sharing what I've watched.❤

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3 years ago

Oh that's true. See the photo I attached to this article as well. :)

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3 years ago

Never better said. You touched on the fundamental issues for a relationship to stay alive over the years, honesty and trust in the partner is essential.

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3 years ago

Yes there are so many things that we have to focus on to keep a healthy relationship, but if we do it right it will last long.

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3 years ago

I believe that all you have mentioned is what we have with my bf for us to reach this long 4 years of relationship. Though we have so much differences but with this 5, we keep each other.

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3 years ago

Differences will bee always there in a relationship, since every person is different, but if you maintain your relationship, it will last long. Potentially life long.

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3 years ago

I hope and pray dear 🥰❤️

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3 years ago

When I and my husband are still GF/BF before, we're LDR for more than 5 years. And all of these 5 foundations you have mentioned is what we have to survive that LDR (take note: no cellphones during that time yet). Now, we're 11 years marriage already after of being BF/GF for almost 8 years :)...so all in all, we're already together for more than 19 years (going 20 years this coming December).

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3 years ago

Wow. Thats nice. My wife and I have been 10 years since we met. And 6 years of marriage. And indeed, to achieve this, what is stated here in the article is essential.

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3 years ago

Congrarulations. You know that unfortunately long term relationship is not so common especially at younger generations. My grandparents and my parents have lived together in marriage for several decades. In your case it means, that you have a very healthy marriage.

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3 years ago

We're trying too :)..We often fight as well but I guess that's part of growing up :)

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3 years ago