Self Discovery.

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We are all on a journey to self-discovery. No man seems to have attained everything in a single swoop because we live and learn as we grow and go through life. Life will happen, situations would threaten us but we must not forget who we are because we don't know who might be hurt by it.

There are so many people whose well-being depends on our dreams. Some find themselves only when we find ourselves. Our lives are intertwined whether we like it or not. So, when we fail to realize who we are, we are making it harder for others to realize themselves quicker.

As humans, I would suggest these 5 things for us to do on our road to self-discovery and self-actualization. No one can do it for you. I can't teach anyone anything but I can make us think...that's what someone once said and it is the truth. So, we can have people that would point us in the right direction but we are the ones to walk the whole length of it. Life is about our experience while we also learn from the experiences of others.

1. Self Image:

How do you see yourself? Always remember that who you are is greater than what you have because what you have is a result of who you are. How do you see yourself? How you see yourself determines what you do with yourself. Your perception is important and what you think of yourself goes a long way to make or mar who you are.

Your self-leadership counts. A lot of people see themselves as a failure which makes them shy away from fulfilling their inherent traits which is why they can't stop failing. Always remember that your projection matters and you cannot feature in a future that you cannot picture. As a leader, you will make mistakes but the ability to learn from them while not blaming another for your own mistakes count too. Take responsibility for your actions but never let them rob you of seeing yourself in a positive light. You are not your mistakes, you need to detach your person from that.

Your source determines your identity. No one can define who he or she is except by the permission of the person you see when you stand in front of the mirror. If you don't know who you are, you will live anyhow. When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable. Always seek to know who you are and be intentional about your growth.

2. Self Integrity:

A lot of things would threaten you as humans. There would always be temptations to test you but you don't have to do things by how you feel others would do but by holding yourself to higher standards. Adherence to values outside yourself, having bold and personal wholeness would require you stepping outside the natural norm.

I remembered when my former place of work credited my account with a month's salary despite paying me my normal entitlement. One voice told me to ignore it and count it as a 'blessing' but another voice told me to do the right thing. I knew this is a test of integrity even when I discussed it with my former colleagues, they were congratulating me for the 'blessing' but I knew it wasn't a blessing. I told them that this is a test of integrity.

I reached out to those in management directly and told them what I received. I sent the money back to them and from my friends, I heard they were impressed that someone can still have that integrity especially with how Nigeria is right now. There are some things I can never negotiate and integrity is one of them. It involves boldness and truth and your circumstances don't determine whether you have integrity or not but it is a matter of choice. Your environment shouldn't determine it either. We need to stop doing things for the sake of survival.

Having integrity is not determined by title but we need to be true to ourselves. We need to be whole in both public and private views.

Making sacrifices for others can also give you integrity. Embracing an attitude of giving also increases your integrity and we need to employ honest communication. As humans, we need to value transparency, not double standards and others should be able to see through us.

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3. Self Starting:

As individuals, we need to take initiative. When people have to explain to us everything that we need to do or have to do, it is a sign that we lack self-leadership and something is wrong. We need to fix that. We need to think outside the box and we should be trusted with things.

Reading about other people's lives even their stories would help you to know what to do at certain times. Yes, we are all different. Some like things being done the way they asked while others want someone who can use their initiative to get things done. We can initiate things and then bring the future into our present.

4. Self Cultivation:

Someone mentioned on noise.cash that after most people graduated from tertiary institutions they have not even opened a single book afterwards. The sad reality of that is that it is true. Most people just want to get by but there is a place for personal growth where everyone should focus on. We need to be intentional about it.

We need to expose ourselves to growth and personal development. Your environment will no doubt facilitate your growth depending on your perspective. Your exposure to things will also facilitate your growth. So, what you train yourself with or how you equip yourself will also facilitate your growth.

We need to always find a way to learn at all times. We are used to filling our heads with the things that are of little or no significance - even things that demoralize us rather than the things that inspire us. We need to consistently learn because the world is changing. The things you thought you knew might not be relevant again in few years to come. We need to unlearn, relearn and continually learn.

5. Self Discipline:

This is about having self-control that regulates our focus. There are distractions everywhere and as earlier mentioned, it is easy to lose focus these days. You have to master yourself by upholding yourself to a certain standard. You have to deny yourself things for the greater good. You cannot always do the things you just feel like doing but you need to ask yourself if the things you are doing is right.

The truth is, we all know the right thing to do but we sometimes try to find a rationale behind it just to excuse ourselves so we wouldn't have to deal with the guilt. This cuts every aspect of our lives and you need to speak when you are required not because you also feel like it. Silence is golden when you cannot think of an answer. Most people answer even before they understand the question.

Thank you for your time.