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What Are The Relationships To Cultivate?
Image Source. https://www.pexels.com/photo/women-sitting-on-green-grass-field-4833957/ Intelligence to me means the ability to accept a piece of information, process it and distil it in such a way that it will affect you positively as well as others too. When we talk about relational intelligence, simply put, I am talking about how you relate with your fellow human. It also means that it is the ability to sustain a relationship just the way you can positively influence such a relationship too. A relationship that you hold dear must be mutual. A business arrangement that is not mutual would crash not to talk about having to relate with another human. In a relationship, we have to give as much as we are willing to absorb. We all need the intelligence in relating with others while not losing our ability to still impact lives positively. In a world where greed and selfishness have taken the center stage, we need to carefully evaluate the relationship that isn't adding value to our lives as I mentioned in a previous post, here. We need to know how to relate with another person because the ability to relate with others would either open some doors for you or close such a door. This is an art that everyone should learn. https://read.cash/@Olasquare/know-your-place-people-1c1055e0 The truth is we cannot survive without having to relate to one another. For any kind of relationship, we still need to relate with one another. When you are fortunate with a good relationship, your life will show for it because they can rub off on you the things that work for them while you seek ways to add value to them as well. We surely smell like the company we choose to keep over time. When you continually surround yourself with those who would constantly drag you down and berate you, very soon, you will see yourself doubting the great things you could have done. Your relationship with others - how you add value to others and how you nourish those relationships would go a long way to determine how well you can turn out. Your environment is a huge factor too. This is why it is often advised that we should think continental even when we find ourselves in an environment that can drag us back. Never let your background or your environment be the reason why you won't open up your mind to dream.
Image Source. https://www.pexels.com/photo/group-of-people-standing-on-metal-stairs-3063910/ The truth is, we cannot do without having a third party in our relationships, either directly or indirectly. There will always be those who want to exert their influence but it is left to us to be intentional about how we relate to others. For those in a relationship, you need to understand that your spouse cannot and won't be everything you want them to be. It is not possible...just as you cannot be everything to your spouse too. This is why it is important to treat everyone with some level of understanding. Someone said and I quote ***"I am not thrilled with how you treat others until I have seen how you treat those who can do nothing for you, like the waitress."*** A lot of people jeopardize their relationship with others because they are in a relationship. I have seen those who cut their childhood friends off because they got married and these people played important roles in their lives at some point. I am all for cutting people off though if you feel they are bad influences and they are adding no value to you but you don't shun people because you think you are ***'better'*** than them by the virtue of marriage. It's never a smart thing to do. We need to honour and respect others. Someone said and I quote ***"Don't burn the bridge because you have crossed over. You never know if you might need that bridge again"***. This is why we need to understand how to relate with people so we can spot kings in rags and not just rule people out as though they can never amount to anything. You need to evaluate yourself and your ability to learn from others regardless of their current status would go a long way to determine how discerning you are. Humility is needed in every aspect of life. I am not impressed by how others treat me until I can see how you treat that gateman or that cobbler or that driver. A lot of people don't know my age from the outside because of the way I am always in everyone's face. I am the playful type so it makes it easier for me though to get along with people. Honesty is key and of course, I try to create a respectable boundary. We need to create a respectable boundary of course because we are not all the same. We don't see things alike nor think alike. Balance is important for everything. Your relationship with others would go a long way to give you some level of desired success.
Image Source. https://www.pexels.com/photo/smiling-woman-with-red-hair-1987301/ In as much as you are being intentional about creating a good relationship with others, you have to create a good relationship with yourself too. Self-love is vital for your growth in life. There is no way you would relate with others effectively if you don't even love yourself. You will mirror your crankiness and your lack of love for yourself on others. Stop holding on to your failures and start seeing the good that can still come out of you. You can't control everything, so let go of the things you can't control and stop blaming yourself all the time for your bad choices. You need to love yourself and seek those who truly care about you and those who can see the goodness left in you and push you to greater heights. Many people go in search of love forgetting they are supposed to love themselves first. ***If I ask you to mention all your favourite people, how long would it take before you mention yourself?*** *Thank you for your time.*
18 comments
So far, I love myself because I'm not on a search for love 🤣🤣
😂😂🤣🤣🤣 that's a smart thing to do, Jane the explorer. When you love yourself, it helps you to relate with others better, even in relationship that isn't about love.
Your question got me off guard. I didn't see it coming. Until now, I'm still questioning myself. Yeah, everytime I met this question, I haven't thought myself to be the answer. My always answer to that question is of course my family, but I forgot myself. You cannot give what you don't have indeed. Thank you for this sir. I now have a deep evaluation of myself.
I am happy it helped you to reflect and that's the essence of life - ability to learn and do better. Yes, we can't give what we don't have and you need to love yourself so others can benefit from that love that comes from within.
Your article made me think of a friend here. We both came together into this school and were doing fine until she met a guy who she now calls her school father. This guy though is rich but because she became his school daughter, she cut ties with me and do not relate with me as before. Though, I wasn't hurt but makes me see the real person she is. Though we still greet each other because I made her understand that doesn't mean we should not greet each other. I will leave room for you someday so you will come to me if ever you need my help. There are people of this type too. The truth is we need to understand who we should let go in our lives. The ones adding value to our lives are to be cherished and do away with people who will only ruin our lives. And finally, self love to yourself Should be your priority and never allow someone dictate your life for you.
I love your practical example, dear. I love how you understand and then relate it. It makes the lessons stick easily that way. As for your friend, she is having a misguided priority. Maybe she feels she is better or he told her to start acting 'mature'. It is funny how people think these days but then, you acted mature and that's how to relate with people. Don't force them, see them for who they are and then move on.
Exactly, that is what I am doing. Thank you 🙏
Smart one. ❤😊🥰
Don't burn the bridge because you have crossed over. You never know if you might need that bridge again. First time seeing this quote and I love it. It has a beautiful meaning, indeed. Wanted to mention myself as *one I really love* but I know I am still in the process of doing it. Still kinda proud though that I make a progress everyday. :))
I am glad you love it and I am delighted to read from you. That's life. Life is a daily process where we learn more about ourselves and seek to improve daily. No one can say they have attained it and I am glad you are measuring your progress as well. You are doing well ❤️😍🥰🥰🥰💞
Thank you, my friend. 🤗
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Your last question made me think about myself. I hope my efforts and treatment of others will make an impact.
Of course, positive efforts will always make the desired impact now or in the long run.
Keep on giving me the dose, wouldn't mind if I take an overdose from you..lol Tapped a lot from this mind blowing post, all what you said is nothing but the reality, if majority can view relationship in your own perspective, there's won't any problem for anyone in relationship, but reverse is the case , majority don't view it the way you do, wish this post can go viral so that people will learn something good. A tree cannot make a forest, we need each other in whatever we are doing in life, though the kind of environment we stay matters alot, in a place where they are trying to influence us negatively, it is better we stay away, staying there will be dangerous. But just like the quote you highlighted here ⬇️⬇️⬇️ "Don't burn the bridge because you have crossed over. You never know if you might need that bridge again". When we stay away from those people doesn't mean we shouldn't talk with them, but we just know the kind of thing we share with them, when we move away finally from them, we might need them tomorrow, but a burnt bridge can be very difficult to amend. Creating a good relationship is not easy at all, working on ourselves too will build us to Know how to relate with other. Just like me I find it very easy to associate with people because... winks** My favorite people??? Unfortunately I don't have favorite people, sound mean??? I associate with everyone, everyone is my favorite, if you hurt me, I'll let you know then i move on with life. Just simple . Nice view about relationship and how to relate with others. Interesting!!!
This comment alone is deserving of a five star and should make it into a post 😂😂😂🤣🤣😂 and I am glad you aired your view on it and enjoyed my dose. More doses for you, dear. You are doing well. Thank you so much for this.
Awnnnnn, five stars for me alone..I'm blushing already. quality is always my watchword , so it's part of me, always trying to trying to write to my satisfaction... hehehehe 😆 Can't to have enough doses from you , you write beautifully well, can't wait to be like you. Your Articles always stand out.
Hahaha trust me, you are doing so well. I love your in-depth knowledge of interpretation and how you carefully put your words together. Totally admirable. Thanks a lot, dear.