The Secret: Show Up

September 25 | Sunday

I haven't spent much time on the platform for the past two days since my day job consumes almost all of my energy and creative juices. If I have any. (lol) It's just today that I came back. I figured I needed to reconnect so I would feel alive.

The first article I read about was doc @LykeLyca 's second-anniversary article. Two years. She's writing for the platform for two years already. I wonder what I did for the past two years. Anyway, I'm glad I have found my way through this platform. I'm writing for more than a year and I admit there are times when what I write is not something of value and not inspiring.

I'm guilty of posting just for the sake of posting every day. Most of the time, I post my articles unedited. Some days I don't even proofread. I just hit publish button to beat myself and prove that I can write every day. I can write but it's not always inspiring.

Inspiring

After Supertyphoon Odette hit our province, I can't go back to online teaching. I was devastated too since I can feel the pressure of worrying if I would have something to eat for the next day since almost everything was ruined:roads, cars, our livelihood, and mobile signal. Everything has an issue. The price of goods didn't even help in easing our worried hearts.

As a Filipina, I still smiled even with the uncertainties that I have faced. I have romanticized resilience thinking that it would take me to another level-somewhere that life is easier. I have sent applications for various job hiring posts that I could see on social media those days. There was a time when we travelled to the city- me and my work mate to try our luck in the field of BPO. Unfortunately, we didn't make it as they opt to hire those who have BPO experience. We came home hopeless. My earnings here became my resource to live by. This platform has helped in during the days I'm processing my papers for my application.

Two weeks later, the university nearby posted a job vacancy. Writer and multimedia editor. I applied for a writer immediately. But I wasn't called for an interview until a month later. I was drowning in the pool of hopelessness until the university called and asked me to come for an interview. It went well except for the fact that the job entails pressure, stress, and a lot of responsibility. 'We'll work with the president, the woman wearing glasses said. As we're on our way home, my fellow applicant and I laugh at how daunting and challenging the job is.

We intended not to submit supporting documents that HR required as we are scared and overwhelmed with the job description. I tried forgetting that I applied for that job. I intend to look for another opportunity. However, after a week, HR called me and informed me that I was the one they deemed fit for the job.

Fast forward, as a newbie many times I felt insecure thinking that I don't belong in the office. My workmates are equally excellent in their field of work. There are instances when I feel like giving up and informing my boss that I would resign. But I persisted. When I feel like giving up, I would talk myself out of it and trick myself. 'Stay for another week'. 'Give yourself a week to adjust. For a month that was my mantra. Every night I would feel pressured yet I slept early thinking that I have to show up every day at work despite my insecurities and my feeling of being pressured. Eventually, I get used to the pressure, the stress, and the feeling of always being in a hurry.

I will be clocking my eighth month as a writer at the university. Time flies fast when you love what you do. My workmates? They became family. The very people I genuinely can't get through life without. They are my second family now. My work entails pressure and more work hours but I love it.

My takeaway? Keep on showing up. Show up at work. Show up at every opportunity that scares you.

Thanks for reading!

Until the next read!