I always kept reminding myself everytime I've been in this situation. I felt this feeling last year, but by Gods Grace I conquered and won that battles. It's been another battle that I am with right now, but same God who I called a help. Trials are just part of life, it's a test of life for us to know that we are capable and able. I never forget on what happened to me last year. I was almost quitting from studying from being loaded with so much activities. I thought I can't go to 2nd year college because of so many things bothered in my mind.
I always felt so empty, I always felt so worthless. It's seems like everything will be ended up, so as my life also. Only one prayer that I always ask to God, is to conquer and finish all the activities on time and before the deadline. Today, it's been another struggle, a struggle for don't have a laptop for doing my Programming codes. I felt so insecure for I can't be with my classmates because of having no laptop. I don't know if I can pass on this major subject, especially our professor is strict in terms of our work.
Our midterm examination is fastly approaching but some professor pushing to have a quiz this week. He wants to conduct a quiz face-to-face, maybe to measure us if we are really learning. This subject is more on mathematics but related to coding. But, this professor is more convenient than other subjects. This professor always give a good vibes, where the students would not be afraid to ask questions if we have questions.
This hectic and busy schedules that I've been right now is blessings. After all of this test and problems that I am dealing with, I know that there would be a good future ahead of me. I just want to find and get a motivation to face and conquer this subjects. I want to learn but my mind don't want to cooperate. If I only have own laptop to make all the activities quickly, maybe passing my activities on time would not be a problem.
Having no laptop and can't participate and can't able to learn in programming. Being passionate in training in the varsity every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Making myself mentally and physically prepared for the upcoming Battle with other school and selection for the big Event will be held in Mati City. Being a student who always ask for favor to people that I knew to sleep in their houses, even though it feels so ashamed. Being a good son, tito and sibling. Being able to stand in front of many people that I am strong and I can.
Despite of all the battle's everyday for doing my best not to fail the people who believed in my skills and in myself. I am thankful because God always renew my strength for me to win the Battles everyday. This would be a test of faith, God checks me if I still there believes in Him. This shall to pass and conquer because I have God who is able and holds everything.