To Stay or To Let Go

Last night, I really don't want to do anything. I just want to lay on my bed and sleep early but my best friend message me. She said that she have some chikas on me. Of course, I'm so excited because I know that her chikas is so much fun because her mouth is really unstoppable. 🤣😅 Yeah, as in unstoppable because every time we've talked she doesn't give me a chance to speak and I love that because I don't want to talked too. There is also a time that we didn't notice that we've been talked for almost 10 hours. Because of that, my auntie thought that I had a boyfriend hehe.

So when she called me , I'm so energetic and said " Hey girl! What's up". Then suddenly, I saw her crying. At first , I thought that she just pranking me. I even said " Don't put some act on me. Remember, I'm much better at acting". But she cried even more. She said that " Girl, Help me ! I don't know what to do". After that , I realize that it is a serious matter.

So here's the story.

She has a suitor for almost 2 years. I know personally the guy because he is my friend and I can say that he is really a nice guy. He even courting my best friend almost everyday. Before, my best friend admitted that she already fallen for him but she is afraid to tell because her parents doesn't allow her to have a boyfriend. So, they remain as a friends or better to say that they are in no-label relationship because they are aware that they are in love to each other. But my best friend also said that there is no assurance for their relationship. The guy can freely stopped that courting thing because she can't assure on how long her feelings last towards him. Sounds complicated right? But they choose to continue that kind of relationship. Their relationship turned out well and I am one of the witness of that. I can also say that they are become more inspired on their studies because of that. (Sana ol Diba😅🤣) Sometimes their sweetness is so annoying especially when they are flirting in front of us. But honestly speaking , I'm so happy for them.

But because of the pandemic, everything has changed. They don't talk much to each other. My best friend also said last night that she was so confused on her feelings to him. She could no longer feel the kilig unlike before. What's even more is that she's not sure if she is still in love. Apparently , she said it to the guy and the guy didn't respond anything. She feels that the guy ignores her feelings. She really don't want to let go that guy but she is also afraid that they hurt each other even more. She really don't know what to do , so she asked my advice.

I'm so speechless actually because I can't imagine that it might happen to them. I was supposed to say " Why me? I don't know anything about love life because I'm NBSB but I also realize that maybe I am the only one that she trusted the most." I just said that they need a heart to heart talk. They need to tell all the feelings and the things that they want to tell each other. For me love isn't only about kilig but most important is the communication behind it. Because if you only looking for kilig , maybe she didn't ready for that relationship. I don't want to say that she should let him go because once she do that decision, she can't take it back anymore. On the other side if she choose to make him stay even she knows that it might be painful to them , maybe the best option is to finally let him go. I also said that maybe they need some space to think thoroughly about this matter because at the end of the day, they are the only one who can make a decision about it. No matter what her decision, it has an impact and consequences that she needs to face.

Honestly, I also end up crying because I know the feeling that you want to fight for something but sometimes letting go is the best way in handling it. It's just you mind and heart has an opposite opinion about it. Maybe it is also one of my reason why I don't want to enter to a romantic relationship because it is become more stressful if you can't handle it properly. When I woke up earlier, the guy also message me and he also asked for my advice. I just said to him the same advice that I said to my best friend. I also told to him that he should be a man this time. If he wants to say something , say it to her because nothing can be fixed if no one will speak about it. He should tell the girl if he wants to stay or he is tired of waiting anymore. He even cried because of what I said. I can't also judge the guy because I know that it is also hard for him to enter to a kind of a relationship that has no assurance at all.But it's their decision anyway before. I don't want to be biased to him or to my best friend because I am aware on what they feel. I want to become rational with regards to my advice to them.

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Final Thought

Love is really complicated especially when it comes to no-label relationship. That kind of relationship is like the accounting principle " Don't assume unless otherwise stated". You have no rights to demand or to assume because at the first place, you are aware that is has no assurance. But sometimes, you already know the answers that are you looking for but you are afraid to admit it. Staying or letting go? For me it's the same thing, you will need to bare the consequences whatever you choose. You should also weigh the possible pros and cons on choosing between them. Reminder, not all the things is worth it to fighting for, sometimes it is better to let go just in order to you to become happier. When it comes to love, we should know how to balance our mind and hear.