Regret not to give a Second chance

Seeing him happy with his new girl is one of the most heartbreaking scene that I've ever encountered. I've never thought that the man that used to be my mine will suddenly hugs another arms. His smile seems so pure when he was with her. But it seems that I am the one who regret the decision that I've made before. I should give him a second chance but my ego is so high that time. I should not blame anyone because I'm the one who at fault. I never give him a chance to explain. What if I listen? Maybe we are still together until now. I'm so fool to let him let go to my life. It is one of the most saddest decision that I've ever made. I only believe on my instinct and guess. Now, I lost my man because of that.

That time, honestly I was supposed to give him a second chance but the jealousy attacks me so deeply. I saw him hugging with the other girl. I know that I'm educated person but that time, it seems that I become crazy. Instantly, I slap the girl in front of my boyfriend. Nate stops me doing that but I didn't listen to him instead I also pull the hair of that girl. He then take me away to that scene and he seems so sorry to the girl and most especially to me. He tends to explain everything but I also slap him while saying " We're over". He begging me to explain but my ears are close to listen to the words that he wants to utter. I don't need his explanation because I witnessed the scene with my two eyes. It's obvious that he hugs her and it is a strong proof that she is his girl. I'm not a girl who will give a second chance especially when I know that there's an evident proof.

Nate was so persistent to court me again. He even go to my workplace everyday just to talked to me but I always refused. He didn't bother to wait for 12 hours outside even sometimes it is raining. He don't care if he is already wet but I am a man of a word, I still not talked to him. I think that maybe he did that because he is guilty. When he tries to approach me, I suddenly called our security to take him away. One time, I saw him lying on the floor because the security pull him. Honestly, I want to help him but I couldn't because I always remember the thing that he did to me. He's a cheater. He repeatedly did that for 3 months. It seems that it is his routine; go to my workplace, tried to talked to me, wait for me , secretly take me home because I saw him following me until I reach my home then he will go when he make sure that I'm walked inside. For about 2years being together until now, I still feel his love towards me. I want to forgive but it is hard on my situation because of my past. All of the man that I have in my life suddenly leaves me because of the other girl. Even my Dad leave me to choose his mistress over us. I admit that I have a trauma with that but Nate proves to me that he is different but it seems that he is like them, he ables to find another girl while we are still together.

But after that night , I never saw him again even his shadow. Maybe he is tired of me but it is a good thing so at least we can move on. Until I saw again that girl that he was hugging that time. She go near to me and tell everything about between her and Nate. After hearing that moment , my body suddenly freeze. I never forget when she said that " I'm excited when Nate said that he will gonna proposed to you. He even asked my opinion about it because he said that you want a beach wedding. He is really excited planning about his proposal to you. By the way I'm Anne, your supposed to be a wedding planner. I'm Nate second cousin". I wanted to cry that time because of that information that I only knew right now. Maybe it is the explanation that Nate wants to said to me. Now, I realize how foolish am I for not listening to him. He did nothing wrong but to love me and to make sure that I'm happy but unfortunately I accused him incorrectly. I asked Anne if she knows where I could find Nate but she said that she don't have an update to Nate since that time. I also said sorry to her for the things that I did to her but she understands because she feels how I love Nate.

It almost 6 months that I'm searching for Nate. I went to his house but their neighbors said that he never comes back for a year. I tried to contact his family and friends but it seems that they also ignored my calls. I searched and stalked all the account with the same name as him in social media but I couldn't find anything. I'm so lost and so down. Where could I find my man? It is really my fault but I want to give a second chance to him. A second chance for us. But it seems impossible. No matter how hard I've tried, it seems that our path was not destined to each other but I've never get tired to look for him. I know that he will able to come back on me again.

I went to the church to pray and asked a sign where could I find Nate. I cried to hard until I saw a familiar face in front. I'm sure that it was Nate. I was supposed to hug him but I noticed that he was with a girl. They are happy talking to each other. I go near to them then he suddenly feel my presence. He was surprised to see me in front of him. He talked to the girl then he take me to the side. I can't help myself to hug him but he immediately let go .

" Nate I search for you for almost a year, I'm sorry because I didn't listen to your explain. I'm sorry if my pride is bigger that my faith on you. But I already know everything. I'm sorry for not giving you a second chance before. I regret it , can we now have that second chance?"

" I'm sorry Vea but the moment I decided to let you go, I promise to myself that I will not bothered you anymore. I tried so many times to explain and you know that but why it seems that you didn't care at all? Do you really love me or you just need someone to talked to? Heaven know how much I love you but it seems that heaven also makes me realize one thing ; that you only love me because I'm the only one who is available".

" No, my love for you is so real Nate. I love you so much. "

" Don't cry Vea, you know that I don't want to see you crying. But thank you because on the moment you push me, I able to find the girl that really cares for me. Thank you for not giving a second chance because by that, I've learned that not all love story is worth fighting for. Thank you because you became part of my past. So please, let yourself move on from us. Just like me, you deserve to be happy". Then he left me and go back to his girl.

I whispered " When the times you asked for a second chance, I should listen to you. When you asked for forgiveness, I should forgive you". I still love him but I'm happy that he already find his peace and happiness. I know that it is a long process for me to move on because I don't want to. I want all those memories with him stay on my heart. He is my " great one" but I'm not his last and only one.

Closing Remarks!!

Sometimes we should allow other people to have a second chance. If we truly love that person, we should listen to them first before make a judgement. Don't let your ego be on top of everything. Don't let that thing be the reason why you lost the person. By giving a second chance , we avoid ourselves from thinking a lot of " What ifs". But on giving it, make sure that this time you also protects yourself because not all people who given a second chance already learn their mistakes. So mindful always dreamers💚