HBD to the person I Misses the Most

Happy Thursday dreamers!! I hope that it is really happy at your end.

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We supposed to sing Happy Birthday together and I will be the one who blow the candles for you. I remember before that Mom got mad on me for doing that because according to her, you are the celebrant so you should be the one wishing and blowing it. But you just let me because your wish is already granted, to have the happy and healthy family. It is already evening and by that time, you and friends supposed to have a drinking session. I missed those noises around the house. Those people who is so confident singing in the karaoke even they already drunk up. Nevertheless, what I missed the most is your voice. My Mom said that your lovely voice is one of the reason why she fell in love harder to you. I can't deny that you have a good voice especially when you sing the song " Heaven Knows". It became my favorite song because of you and until now, I still listening to it. Actually right now while I'm writing this one, I listening to the same song.

Aside from listening to your old radio, one hobby that I missed doing with you is having movie marathon, action movie to be exact while teasing each other. I remember that you are the one who pushes me to learned some basic martial arts because you said that you can't protect me forever. That one day even we don't want to, you will need to leave me. Poor me for thinking that you have another girl for that, without realizing that the good bye you are talking about is your death. I know that deep inside you support me when I said that I joined military but of course Mom didn't agree with it since I am the princess in the family. We understand Mom so I didn't push through that dream. It is still clear to my mind everytime we joined force to tease Mom. Her face turns red in madness while our face blushing because we laughing so hard. You said that Mom is the real boss in the house, so we immediately apologize to her but in the next day, we tease her again. Maybe that's the reason why my siblings thought that I'm your favorite child. I didn't feel to ,maybe we just the same level of energy and naughtiness haha. On the other hand, maybe it is also the reason why I can't still move on with you. It is still playing on my mind the moment I rushed you to the hospital until I can't do anything but to watched you how to lost your breathe.

Candle

Deep sigh. 1..2..3... I put candles but this time not on the birthday cake but rather I used the candle to commemorate your birthday. Just like you want, I used blue candles earlier. I remember that you always told that it's okay if you don't have a celebration as long as you blow a blue candles. For you, blue means peace and happiness. I sang a Happy Birthday song but unlike before, I sing it alone with a dramatic tone. I missed my original duo. Somehow, I celebrate your birthday alone since the whole family is in the province. I called them and they are happy celebrating your day. There prepared a lot for foods for you but we all know that you can't taste that anymore. But we're hoping that you can pay visit to us. I promise that I will never be afraid if ever you shown up to me as a ghost. For sure, I will immediately hugs you if ever. You can also visit me through my dreams. You are always welcome to bothered me. I just wandering if those souls in heaven still remember their birthdays. Or they are still celebrating it? I know you, you will laughed at me once I asked you that questions.

Happy Birthday Dad. It's a big celebration if you are alive because you are now 60 years old. An official senior citizen but can swag as a teenager. Besides I missed you, I can't say anymore. I hope you are doing well there. Don't be naughty okay? I missed you. I missed you. I really missed you. I'm hoping that you can still watched me over there. Am I still your princess right? I hope that you are proud on my little progress in life. Please don't let Mom to be with you there because I don't know if I can manage if ever I lost another parent. Both of you are the people whom I value the most. Just chill and watched me okay, I will make our dreams into reality. I will make Mom feel like a queen. Don't worry I will protect my siblings even they are already old enough. I don't want to be emotional tonight so I bid my good bye to you. But you know where to find me right? Feel free to visit me Dad ,even for this night. One day if we'll gonna meet again, I will hug you so tight. No one can change my mind, you are still the coolest Dad in the world. I love you so much Dad, happy birthday again.

I guess that's for tonight. I don't know what you say anymore since there's a flashback running in my head. Hope everyone will get a good night sleep later.