Staying Out Of A Toxic Relationship

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Avatar for Maryjacy
2 years ago

The person will fall in love with might probably not be the person who broke us If life ran like a storybook. But sadly, we tend to be a bit more human than that, we fall in love, we get hurt once and over again and we still stay. People indeed need each other but sometimes the cost is a heavy one to bear. The breakage can be far-reaching when it's a toxic relationship.

Love is addictive, but sometimes the power of this can be self-destructive. Walking away from a relationship that is loveless, dangerous, or hostile is one of the hardest things to do. A bad relationship is that one that will always steal your joy with an undeniable clamor, it's not just about being on the downside fall of the usual relationship ups and downs.

How do you know when to let go?

Majority of time, the sign is always clear, it is now meant for us to see it. Emotional and physical abuse, cheating, emotional starvation, and constant criticism do feel right and sometimes nothing is outstanding noticeable but the sign might lie in the intimacy between you both.

Sometimes there's nothing in your way except you, you get addicted to love with the circumstances that make leaving to be difficult, and some of those things are :

  • Staying because you want more for yourself

  • knowing it's bad and yet you stay.

  • You know that there's an important in you that stays hungry in your relationship, I.e security, love, respect intimacy, and yet you still choose to stay.

  • The pain of leaving always brings you back even when you try to end the relationship.

Hence, when leaving feels as bad as staying, what will you do?

Leaving a bad relationship is difficult, but the power to do so all lies in your hands. It requires strength and energy to stay in a toxic relationship as it does to leave, but you can always channel the strength and the resources you used in staying to propel you forward.

1)Be present: The pull to check the way it was or the way you are and be spectacular. The energy to keep you moving exists only in the present. Try to experience how broken the relationship looks without needing to change it or control it.

However, no relationship is perfect, couples do have grudges with each other, that's a normal part of living and loving together, but the problem is when there's abuse, insecurity, harm, and the grieve of the relationship as it stands, when you remember all this, it will make It easier to move away.

2) Give it a deadline: when you're hoping that everything will be better, try to give it a deadline, don't make it to be too long, it might be six weeks, six months, whichever one that you feel is right for you, during that period, try to give the relationship everything you've got and hern the day finally comes, try to be honest with yourself and act from a place of strength and self-love, right there in front of you, you'll find your answer

3) Fight for you: fighting for what you believe in and what you love is very important and one of those things has to be you. What would do when someone is facing the same deadness and the pain you're feeling? Feel more courageous inside, because a fighter, a Queen, a king and you deserve everything good that will make you feel happy. But first, you have to be fierce, bold, and bravely fight for yourself the way you would fight for anyone you love.

4) Become selfish: Try to recognize what you need and things you can do to meet those needs. There will always be fallout when you allow the noise to shout you down and make you Ignore your needs. You have to understand that what you need matters, which means you'll have to put yourself first on the list and feel too important to stay out of a toxic relationship.

5) Stop making excuses and know what you want: what do you want from a relationship? And what is the difference between what you want and what you are getting? And how long so far? If you are loved, it will always feel like love even amid the storm, the stress, things you do or say, the weariness. A Loving relationship is filled with respect and security even during tough times, but if it doesn't feel good for you, it's not, it is better to move away.

Conclusion

All relationships will pass through make it or break it time, but a healthy relationship will recover no Matter the tough time. They'll become closer and more stronger.

When a relationship is barreled around with a storm, if the relationship is healthy, it might take time to put things together, but an unhealthy relationship will deteriorate from the lack of nourishment and will die off eventually.

You are the only one in the right place to decide whether to stay or go, but you have to be mindful of your reasons, sometimes the most life-changing things do not lie in what we do but in what we stop doing.

The only truth that matters is that, If the relationship feels bad, then It's bad, for you. Fight to keep your relationship but when there is no more fight left out, you'll have to decide what's best for yourself.

Thanks for your time.
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2 years ago

Comments

Relationships are meant to be enjoyed and not endured and the moment endurance is becoming the order of the day, it is a red flag for anyone to see.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Exactly ! How long are we going to endure, we don't have to keep enduring at the expense of our life...for our safety, we have to build the courage to stay away from toxic relationship.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Exactly, if it feels bad then it is bad. I think the best thing to do is as soon as a relationship starts smelling toxic, is to end it asap.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

If relationship is becoming toxic and we are giving it our best to make it work it and it's seems there's change, it's is better to move out of the relationship, they should not be blinded with love...

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I've in a relationship wherein we survived 5 difficult years. I thought, he was already the one for me but things changed and eventually we broke up. I fell inlove again, just months with him but it already feels like forever and now we are expecting our first baby

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Wow! That's an interesting love story, that's why I said, true love will never die, no matter the storm that will come... It's meant to be .

$ 0.00
2 years ago

True, that's what I always say to myself.

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2 years ago

Morning dear Mary... I have always been of the belief that no one is indispensable and we shouldn't be afraid to take strong decisions no matter how tough it appear on the surface. "When one door closes, it's because another is about to open". Love is never and can never be an object of pain

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Good my lovely sis 🥰. We don't have to stick to a relationship that is toxic all in the name of love, staying means you don't even care about your life. We have to be cautious of those violence warning signs, we have to make the right decision for ourselves because we deserve peace in our live not violence.

I appreciate your contribution 😊

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2 years ago

You are welcome dear. Have a lovely day 🤗

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2 years ago