Today's a Friday; the day where my brain got fried due to stress and couldn't figure out what to write to mark my writing everyday challenge. I'm so beat in a way that the usual writing inspiration is so far away from me and I can't even write as little as twenty words without having brain freeze. That's what stress does to you; it turns your hobby into a really tough job that you can't handle without experiencing mental stress.
Though I didn't go through stress today as compared to the other days but the accumulated stress for about two weeks is beginning to tell on me; I can't think straight, can't do things without thinking too hard because my brain occasionally freezes; one moment I'm about to do a certain thing and the next I'm trying to remember exactly what I wanted to do because I already forgot. I'm beginning to forget things too easily almost like I went through chemotherapy; I'd rather not talk about this but one of the side effects is that it causes people to forget things easily.
I've been forgetting things too easily these days and I know it's due to me doing too many things simultaneously. I'm doing too many things at the same time which I think I should reduce if I intend to lead a normal life. I basically write articles on read.cash everyday, short posts on noise.cash, play Axie infinity for hours while simultaneously monitoring my crypto portfolio, doing research on PVU (plane vs Undead) and yada yada. I'm beginning to feel I'm not human because if I decided to write a complete list of the amount of things I do at once, you'd definitely tag me crazy; too many things for one person to handle, I need to drop some of them and focus on only a few so I can be normal like everyone else.
In fact I'm considering quitting Axie infinity because I spend too much time on it and its beginning to tell on me via my mental health. I sleep at night and all I see myself playing is Axie infinity arena mode; I don't want these kind of dreams, makes me wake up with a headache because it means I was partially asleep while a part of me was awake and strategizing new means to win PVP arena mode.
I'm considering writing a letter to coach Nazko while mentioning that the opportunity to be a scholar is highly appreciated but I need to clear my head and relax or it will be a total shutdown for my brain if I do not stop myself early. I know he would definitely understand and respect this decision; I've been thinking about this since yesterday and this is exactly what I'm going to do as soon as I receive my first payment which is scheduled for next week Tuesday or Wednesday considering that next Tuesday makes it two weeks since the beginning of my AxieBCH journey.
I will keep the kristoffer | AxieBCH guild alive in case of a latter time where I decide to go back to being a scholar but for the moment I'm considering quitting and nothing will stop me from doing so.
Been writing this article since morning but the inspiration to write properly simply didn't come through; it's now midnight, a brand new day and I missed publishing on friday because of brain freeze. I was writing this article and at some point I completely forgot what I was writing about; had to relax and eventually fell asleep, woke up now at realised it's now midnight. I guess I'd have to continue so I can publish it anyway.
The amount of self inflicted stress I go through everyday is simply too much and I need to do something about it in order to feel normal once more; I'm tired of constantly forgetting things midway, tired of forgetting why I stepped into a room, tired of forgetting what I was about to do, and tired of forgetting the conversation of the previous day. I think rest will help; rest is what I intend to get and there's no holding me back.
I appreciate that you took time to read through my not so meaningful write-up for the day; thank you so much.
Enjoy the rest of your day, don't forget to have fun and rest when you can.
Lead image from unsplash