My Weird Behavior

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Avatar for Kelzy
Written by
1 year ago

Have you sometimes questioned yourself if you are normal? That every action you make, other people also do? That everything is not strange and you can be just you. The fear of being judged never crossed your mind not until one day someone noticed that you are not like them. They called you weird or "abnormal" and that confused you about yourself? "Am I not like them?"

Lead Image from The Odyssey Online and edited in Canva

I don't know if it's just me but I have this weird behavior that I'm talking to myself whether I'm alone or even in a crowded place. I just can't control myself to speak out to the thoughts that have a voice inside my head. I didn't think it was weird before until my aunt caught me talking in the mirror.

Me: Pay your tuition later so you can take an exam.

Also Me: Okay (Smiling in front of the mirror)

Aunt: Who are you talking to?

Me: Huh? No one.

Aunt: Why did you say okay in the mirror?

Me: I'm not.

Actually, before I didn't notice that I'm talking to myself. I thought it was all in my head and my aunt was just teasing me. But after several times that she caught me and told me I'm crazy, I observe myself and confirmed it. I heard my own voice saying "Mamaya pumunta kang Maynila", "Go to Manila later". It was so clear. I get nervous hearing myself thinking I'm literally crazy.

Since then, I observed myself so that I can avoid others' comments but at first, it was hard and I can't shut my mouth not to speak out what is on my mind. There this one time I caught myself again talking in a public place. I'm sitting on the bench in the park and I didn't notice there is a woman looking at me. It was so embarrassing! I said "Kakain pa ba ako mamaya? Hmmm. Sige na nga!" (May face reaction pa yan mga dzai na parang may kausap talaga ako) "Should I eat later? Hmmm! Alright!" The face of the woman looked shocked and was about to say something but I stand immediately and leave the park right away.

It was 3 years ago already. I didn't go back to that place again thinking she might recognize me. Geez!

I told my boyfriend about this weird behavior of mine and he said it's normal, especially for me who experience a lot of traumas before, and advised me to think first before saying anything because until now I'm still careless. I can control it somehow now but not totally.

I was thinking what if it will go worse when I give birth one day. Because they said there is a chance that women will be depressed after they deliver a baby and will act strangely. Cringe!

How about you? Do you also have weird side? How do you manage to hide or change it? Does it affect your personal character? If not, you are fortunate!

Anyways, that's all for my blog today! Did you find me creepy now? Lol.


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1 year ago

Comments

Hello there Kelzy, nice to meet you! By the way, nangyayari din sa akin yan, nakakabahala din but para sa akin normal lang yan minsan parang inaaway ko pa ppo yung sarili during decision making hehe.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I think normal lang namam yan hahaha. Ako nga nakikipag debate sa sarili ko HAHAHAHA

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Consciously or not, strangeness comes when feeling unhappy, staring while talking to himself.

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Maraming ganyan, and ganyan din naman ako. Iiyak, tatawa, then biglang magagalit habang nakatingin sa mirror. Kahit sa public, naglalakad ako na nagsasalita, especially pagmay iniisip ako. Yung boyfriend ko naman, sasabihan ko: ha? di naman kita kinakausap. sarili ko kinakausap ko. Siguro yung iba, akala lang siguru nila may kababalaghan nang nangyayari kaya may natatakot din. Di nila alam, sarili lang natin ang kausap. haha

$ 0.02
1 year ago

Hala ganyan na ganyan ako dzai. Normal lang pala tu 😹

$ 0.00
1 year ago

lahat naman tayo may iba ibang behavior....kahit ako man nakikipag usap sa sarili ko kasi kung di ko gagawin mababliw ako hahah...pero yung kung ako lang mag isa haah

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Di lang pala ako 😹

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Hehe hindi ka weird sis , ang cute nga ehh haha para ka lang nasa Kdrama madalas kinakausap ang sarili haha..

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Ang isip ko naman parang sa anime 😹

$ 0.00
1 year ago

May ganyan rin akong side ate hehe pero yung salita ko mahina na haha. Minsan nga tatawa pa ako mag-isa eh haha😂

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Haha oo ganyan na ganyan din ako be pero di ko mahinaan boses ko may nakakarinig talaga 😹 tas may face reaction pa 😹

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Feeling ko normal lng naman un, kasi minsan ganyan din ako

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Normal nga lang dami din nag seshare e 😹

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1 year ago

I also have times when I can talk to myself. Hahaha

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Haha natakot ako sa sarili ko nung may nakapuna e 😅

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1 year ago

Ganyan na ganyan ako sis. Lagi ko kinakausap self ko para bang I am advising myself ganun. Minsan sa isip Lang talaga siya pero di ko namalayan na I was literally talking to myself. I usually do that pag nagdadrive ako ng motor going or back to work.

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Normal lang pala tu akala ko baliw na ako 😹

$ 0.00
1 year ago

yes normal lang yan sis.

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1 year ago

For me langga it's normal. It's part on yourself. It's part on your behavior. Iba iba kasi yung tao langga. May mga ganyan. Kinakausap nila sarili nila like my friend langga. Same kayo.

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Sis same! HAHAHAHA may times na kausap koxslef ko tas bigla aq sasagot, like one time nakatingin aq sa mga pagkain tas kasama q partner q. Sabi ko sa sarili ko, "Gusto mo nyan?." Tas sumagot aq ng, "Ayoko hanap tayo iba." Nagulat partner q eh HAAHAHAH kala nya multo kausap ko 🥲

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Ang cringe eno 😹

$ 0.00
1 year ago